Afraid.

Im scared to live But afraid to die

I want to be happy and laugh, not be sore But afraid that means I don't care anymore

I wish I could try new things and let out a happy scream But afraid people will judge me

I want to be me But afraid that's the worst person I can be

I want to be free, smile, be happy and carefree. I want to be the best of me! But I'm afraid that I can't do that because then I might be considered a selfish brat

If I am afraid to be happy but don't want the sad to get the best of me then what do I do? Don't let fear get the best of me?

Maybe I should be happy But would people just call me sappy

I don't want to get judged or be a disappointment But then when I worry about that I can't schedule my happy appointment

So while I am afraid of happy for what they could say Im not gonna let my fear take away my happy days