It's hard, being alone. Believing you have nobody to turn to. Hoping the next day would be better. Always trying to pick yourself up after a hard fall.
For me, I felt lonely when you didn't notice when I stopped smiling. When all I could hear you talk was about yourself. When even a scream or my cry for help wouldn't wake you up from your daze.
For a best friend, you did a really shitty job at taking my feelings into consideration. Everything was always about you and how you could raise your ego up higher.
Perhaps we weren't meant to be. But the loneliness in my heart started to sink in deeper until I felt as if I was drowning. Gasping for air, desperate for you to notice.
I don't blame you. You lived your life. You told me all about it. Even the problems you had. Until you decided that my company simply wasn't enough anymore. You needed more people to see
just what an incredible life you lived. And in the process, you forgot about me. Left me behind. Again.
You isolated me from everybody by being my friend, until everybody was isolated from me.
You made me feel the special type of lonely. When at first you believe everything's okay, you have a friend. But then that friend leaves you for better ones and makes them leave you alone as well
You can't cure selfishness and you can't change the past, but I truly hope that karma exists for people like you.
The hours I spent listening to you, loving you, wanting to be enough and craving that friendship you claimed we had were all a waste. Because once you used me, you threw me away.
And I know about the lies you tell yourself and others. They believe them. They don't stop to think twice to listen to my story. Maybe that's why I'm better off.
I want to tell you, though, about my loneliness. Because I think you feel it too. Deep down, in that cold, bitter whatever's-left-of-that-heart-of-yours.
I want to tell you so you one day know that everything that happened to you, you did to me.
You used me to show people how great your life was. You smiled when I finally got you to listen to my problems because you were happy your life wasn't so pathetic.
You broke me down for fun and left me in times I needed you most because you didn't think I was worth your attention anymore.
I bought you gifts because I thought I could win over your affection with money. Because you were just that shallow.
I needed a friend. I needed someone to hold on to, who was willing to listen without judging or rolling their eyes. You were not that person.
You may have thought I was needy, but all I asked was that FOR ONCE you acted LIKE A FRIEND. Like you CARE.
And it didn't have to be about my problems or anything. Just simple shows of affection. You were my best friend.
Too bad I didn't see how toxic your presence was. You are a devil in disguise.
But there was still something left you couldn't take away from me during our friendship. Myself.
But you, being who you are, managed to slip your way in and twist my opinions, my emotions and the way I viewed myself. You made me insecure. You broke me.
And it was my fault. I was stupid, foolish, idiotic enough not to realize that I deserved better. You made me think I didn't but I do. I deserve better than you.
So after we parted, I felt angry. Not just at you. But at myself. For letting a bitch like you earn my trust and then destroy everything I ever loved.
You broke me and I let you. But not anymore. I learn from my mistakes.
I just hope other people treat you better and leave you in better shape than you did me. Not that you deserve it.
This is my opportunity to finally say goodbye and make my piece with the past. And I'm taking it. Goodbye and I hope to never see you again.