My rescuer
My rescuer depression stories

wobalo Community member
Autoplay OFF   •   3 months ago
Sitting outside the classroom

My rescuer

This floor is bloody cold.

I can feel my bones, those bones in your bum that dig in when you're sat on something hard. It's a weird feeling, if I wiggle to the left it gets worse- like rubbing stones together.

At least I'm distracted, or was.

I think I can hear her laughing again, so I count my breaths. 1..2..3.. it's probably not about me. She's probably not laughing about me..4..

She might be though, laughing at how I'm stuck out here on the floor...5... She's probably laughing because she thinks she has won.

I'll be the one in trouble for leaving the room, I'm the one who is sat alone with nobody here, I'm the loser. Alone. She's definitely laughing at me.

This floor is bloody cold.

All I need is the courage to get off this floor. If I can be brave enough to walk back into the room and to my seat, then they'll stop laughing. Stand up, and make 20 steps. I can do 20 steps.

The laughing has stopped, but my bones are still digging in the floor. Why can't I stand up?

What is so wrong with my brain that I'm paralysed here. I should just be able to walk, why is it so terrifying?

I can hear a video starting, some childish song Miss is putting on to distract us from how boring her lesson is.

She'll pop her head out the door soon, help me breathe, give me the courage to walk in.

Now I feel guilty, complaining about Miss when she spends half her lesson sorting me out.

I breathe. Finally, I can breathe.

"Bad day again? Why don't you tell me about it?"

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