My, Uh-Hum, Review Of The Oscars
My, Uh-Hum, Review Of The Oscars oscars stories

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by tbanarchy Like the Super Bowl, i didn't bother watching the Oscars last night. (Again, I know. SHOCKER!)

My, Uh-Hum, Review Of The Oscars

by tbanarchy

Like the Super Bowl, i didn't bother watching the Oscars last night. (Again, I know. SHOCKER!)

Though I did happen to catch the "award" for "best actor" while I was channel-surfing.

And the only reason why I didn't go ahead and keep changing the channel was because That Joker Guy was nominated.

And, surprise of surpises, That Joker Guy won!

(For the record, I keep calling him That Joker Guy because he has kind of a weird first name and I'm too damn lazy to look it up to see how to spell the damn thing!)

Anyway, That Joker Guy had to ruin his Oscar win-which was his first-by giving one of the "wokest" speeches that lasted about 4 or 5 minutes.

From what I recall of TJG's "woke" speech was that he hated milk (which he likened to kidnapping). I mean, he REALLY hated milk!

Probably the most interesting thing about That Joker Guy's win was the "reaction" to said win on-where else!-Twitter.

I was expecting to see one "triggered" tweet after another since the "wokesters" on Twatter HATED this movie because "Orange Man Bad" or whatever.

Instead, the "wokesters" of Twatter-from what I saw, at least-applauded That Joker Guy's speech. (Because they hate milk too?)

I guess a little "wokeness" goes a LONG way, huh, That Joker Guy?

Anyway, other "woke" moments at the Oscars-and, from what I read, there were PLENTY!-included actress Natalie Portman-and, no, I'm NOT making this up!-wearing a cape with the names of the "snubbed" female directors.

For those who don't know, the "bad man" who won "best director" was from South Korea. I would have LOVED to see Miss Portman walk up to him and say how a "waman" should have won instead!

BTW, Natalie pulled this SAME "woke" shit a few years ago at the Golden Globes by going off about "waman" directors not being "nominated" while she was standing onstage next to a clearly befuddled Ron "Solo" Howard.

Also, BTW, for all her "woke" talk about supporting "waman" and whatnot, Natalie Portman once signed a petition along with her fellow Hollywoke thespians SUPPORTING convicted RAPIST Roman Polanski.

Not only that, but Natalie Portman is head of her own movie production company and she has reportedly hired only ONE female director herself. And I'll give you three guesses as to who that female director is.

Here's a hint: Her initials are NP!

Which just goes to show how Natalie Portman is REALLY good at showing her ass!

Yet another particularly cringe-worthy "woke" moment at the Oscars was when "hunky"Brad Pitt won for whatever and he said the following during HIS "acceptance" speech (which I got off Twatter):

“They said we only have 45 seconds up here, which is 45 seconds more than John Bolton got in the Senate.”

For the record, John Bolton is one of the BIGGEST war hawks in Washington who not only "advocated" the US going to war with Iraq-and look how well THAT turned out!-but he also recently advocated so-called "regime change" in Iran since that also worked out well for the US. (Google Shah of Iran.)

But, according to Brad Pitt and his fellow Hollywoke thespians, that's OK since John Bolton, like the Hollywokesters, thinks "Orange Man Bad" too (even though he used to WORK for the guy!)!

It's sort of like how all of the "wokesters" are now lining up to kiss Mitt "Corporate Raider" Romney's ass because he, too, thinks "Orange Man Bad" (or at least he does NOW).

However, in spite of all of the "woke" moments at this year's Oscars, which included another Oscar "winner" to quote from the Communist Manifesto, the show reportedly got its lowest ratings EVER.

Man, all that good "wokeness" shot to shit!

But, there again, it's OK since "Orange Man Bad" and shit!

In any case, the Hollywokesters at the Oscars SHOULD have all taken Ricky Gervais's advice and took their award, said their "thank you's" and otherwise STFU!!!!

Which is why my all-time favorite Oscar speech came from actor Joe Pesci-anyone remember him?-who won at the Oscars years ago and he got up, took his Oscar and said simply "Thank you!" and turned around and sat back down.

Hollywokesters, take note!

Oh, BTW, I did enjoy seeing Brie "Captain Marvel" Larson's "woke" cleavage at the Oscars while standing onstage with Sigourney "Alien" Weaver and Gal "Wonder Woman" Gadot.

Hey, maybe they can make a "Wonder Woman vs. Captain Marvel" flick where Wonder Woman thoroughly kicks the "woke" ass of Captain Marvel? I bet there'd be A LOT of people-myself included!-who would pay to go see THAT flick!

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