Hard to change
Hard to change stories
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tatcat
tatcatSilently felt
Autoplay OFF  •  10 months ago
It's hard.

Hard to change

–confessions of a coward

It's hard, for me to change:

The way I handle my issues. My hurt. The way I Shove it down So deep Where nobody Can heal it.

It's hard for me, To change who I have been:

Broken, Misunderstood, Scared, A liar, And an outlaw In my own body

Broken

Broken by their words By the harshness of this Cold and unrelenting society By the internal guilt that eats Slowly devouring my will to Try to heal and recover

Misunderstood

Misunderstood when I was only trying to help My intentions were good My actions were meddled Bent by my lack of perspective I wish I had not done anyone harm But it's futile

Scared

Scared of the world Of the untiring suffering That calls out and yearns To envelop just one more. Scared of my demons The secrets I hid The things I try to forget Scary things, in my head.

A liar

I smile, "it's ok" *I'll be fine" Finer than the glittery dust of a splintered broken glass, Finer than the sharpest point of a razor Finer than the finest tragedy you've never met. Fine.

An outlaw in my own body

A complete stranger in a familiar place

Nothing feels right anymore

My limbs ache, my head is sore

I run to my room

I close the door

I'm too scared to change

I'd rather dissociate Than feel this pain anymore.

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Eviction Notice
It's time for you to go.

tatcatSilently felt
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tabnash24Silver CommaYou'll know me as you read ;)
5 months agoReply
Oh tacat, how long it's been since I last read from you. You sure have talent for drawing people to your words, it's like the Pied Piper thing. This was wonderful but I hope you're better than before now. :)

vijay19sCommunity member
10 months agoReply
nice

bernardtwindwilGold CommaGranddad & story teller, tomthepo8.com
10 months agoReply
That was magnificent. This poem was constructed in such an excellent manner than it urged the message right along. The wording was so impassioned that it took the reader into the world you wanted to build for us. Great job!!!!!