I shall pose you a riddle, On which you may sup. Pray tell, which comes first - The tea, or the cup?
'Ah ha!' do you cry, But then, you will falter. Is the tea the hot meal, Or the tea that's leaf water?
You see, this is the problem, And it comes down to time, With Brits - is it noon, Is it six, is it nine?
Tea time, you see, Is rather bemusing - Being anytime one drinks, Or has dinner. Confusing!
But of course it's not dinner, Oh no, dinner's lunch, The meal after elevensies, (Or what yanks do call brunch.)
Supper is after dinner, The light snack, if you please. A tea and some biscuits, Or crackers and cheese.
(Biscuits, by the way, Are hard and sweet. For dunking in tea, Not gravies and meat.)
And then we have tea, When the night draws in, And if you're still keeping up, Well there's one last spin -
They're all used interchangeably, It's geography that decides, As long as tea's first drunk, To line your insides.
Finally, there's the sugar, The cake, the crumble, But be warned, dear reader, There's a trap - don't fumble.
Is it pudding or afters? A sweet, or dessert? Depends on your class, But you must never convert!
What you call things is vital, 'Uphold family tradition! 'Or else,' Granny warns, 'You'll be caught in contrition.'
And finally, at last, We return to our riddle, Your answer if you please, And no taradiddle.
Oh, I've caught you again, Oh, you poor silly dunce! With meals there is tea, And a cup, all at once!
So is it the meal or the drink? I'll leave that to you, But oh, while you're up - Could you make us a brew?