My Dearest (part 4)
My Dearest (part 4) letters stories
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starry_cosmos
starry_cosmos 🌙 You are a star in our cosmos ⭐
Autoplay OFF   •   4 years ago
Continuing My Dearest as a series of letters received by my grandmother. May her wisdom and experiences shared with you reach you. In this letter, she shared her experience losing her husband.

My Dearest (part 4)

What a busy week! I always feel worn down after a long day. I really didn't accomplish much. I suppose it can't be helped when you're this old. Don't think I'm becoming a couch potato so soon. In my day, everything was made to last. I've outlived my warranty. Ha! Ha!

I find it funny that visiting the cemetery is considered traveling in my case. I suppose it's mostly all the effort I go through to mark the occasion. I dress myself up and get my hair done in the morning, and then I go buy a fresh bouquet of sunflowers and red roses to mark the occasion. Who says you can't look good in your 70's?

I suppose you know why I visited the cemetery today. But in case you forgot, today was the third year anniversary of your grandfather's passing. And it doesn't get any easier as the years go by to live in that house without him. May he rest his soul. I hope he smiles from ear to ear when I visit wearing my yellow magnolia dress with my favorite pearls. I wore them on our last wedding anniversary together.

I did everything I could during his last years on Earth. He had dementia, cardiac arrhythmia, and was bedridden. Having nurses come by the house to check on him was time-consuming when done on a daily basis. I remember when I made yellow cake for those nurses as my token of appreciation, and your grandfather wanted a slice!

I decided that, since I had nothing better to do, that I should learn first-aid, CPR, and take classes at a local community college about nutrition so that I can make a healthy recipe guide for Elias. He would barely eat and didn't like anything but my home-cooking. Trying to get him to eat kale was entertaining. He drank half a bottle of ranch dressing after eating some. Ha!

I wanted to learn because I thought it would be useful in case there was ever an emergency. I feared he would have an emergency one day for whatever reason and I would just stand there helplessly watching him suffer. Oh I couldn't bear the thought. I had prayed that if he were to pass, that it would be in his sleep. Instead I was blessed to have been right by his side.

When they had to come take him away, I thought to myself how that day was the last day of his life, and he spent it smiling with me. I tried to revive him three times as I waited for help to come. He left very peacefully. I was so sore the days after from all the effort. I told you about that before. Since then I've had so many visitors, family and friends alike, coming to keep me company.

I asked them that when the of his passing came around, that I would like to be left alone with him. I still bring my little plastic chair, sandwiches, tea, and his flowers and just sit by his grave to read, write, and pray. He spent his last day with me, and now I wish to continue spending that day together with him. I've been doing this for three years. Sometimes your mother will take me if I need the help.

She's so helpful. Despite his passing, I never feel as sorrowful as I expected. When someone passes away, I like to think they are always with us, and that they would continue wanting us to live our lives to the fullest. I desire their peace. So many people pass away so soon. It can be upsetting and unfair.

But if you live your life to the fullest every day, find peace in yourself, content with what you've done in your life no matter how small the accomplishments were, you will find yourself only sorry for the inconvenience of having people miss your presence and the sound of your voice. And your legacy will be in the impact you made when you were still here.

I hope you live every day of your life to the fullest and by doing everything you possibly can. Don't ever rush. Things take time to accomplish. Your grandfather accomplished being a wonderful husband, father, and grandfather. It wasn't on his resume or given as an award. The award was seeing how his love for you all helped you become loving human beings yourselves.

We are both very proud of all of you no matter what you choose to do. We know you will do something great. The exciting part is not knowing what it could possibly be! That's entirely up to you. We love you so much, Bless

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