Im in a lot of pain right now, it's the same emotion, over and over again. I’m never happy with my life, I always find flaws.
I bumped into a girl into a girl when coming into my building block, she said “ oh, I haven’t seen you in a while”, I smiled “ yeah, ha” she brushed past me while I watched her leave.
The voice in my head whispered “ maybe because you don’t care about me. That's why you haven’t seen me”
I stood on the platform there was already train waiting, I watched it go by, I saw the tracks and how the train moved away with the lights glaring at me, I wanted to jump,
I wanted to step over the yellow line and get sucked into the electricity. I felt the breeze then seconds later screeching sound of the next train arrives… I step back.
Moments like this are becoming more and more common, moments like these hurt my heart and body.
But all I can do it wait.