You're not him

You look like him,

but you're not him.

Your presence doesn't matter,

because you're not him.

Do I miss you?

No, but I miss him.

You seem to know me,

but I don't know you.

Did you kill him or did I?

It's a mystery we will never know,

because sometime in May, he died.

We do not share a memory,

We did not share a bed,

We did not share the endless kisses and hugs,

In simple words, you and I, we don't have a history.

If I talk about him, it's not you that I talk about.

If I think about him, it's not you in my mind.

If I save his pictures on my phone, don't be afraid, it's not you that I am seeing.

There is no need for you to avoid me,

There is no need for you to run away,

I don't know you to notice you,

Because your presence and face is not that matters,

But his absence that mattered until I figured you're not him.

I don't wait for you because you're not him,

But I also don't wait for him because it's true he's gone to a world where I can't be.

Today, I find him in the pictures we took.

I find him in places I missed him the most,

I find him in the dreams I constantly have about him,

I find him in the plans we built,

I find him in the tears I cry to sleep because I miss him.

I find him in the daylight and the stars at night,

I will find him in my 1st birthday without him,

I will find him in my heart, a place you will never be able to replace him.

I will find him in the christmas tree,

I will find him in the cards he made for me,

But most importantly, I will find him in all the good memories that you erased from him.