He felt like a monster who needed to be punished.
So he played tic tac toe on his arm with a blade.
Why didn't she want him to call?
Why doesn't she want to text even?
Why did she disappear for 3 days?
He knew he'd fuck up their friendship, but he didn't know it'd happen that fast.
He wasn't sad. He was angry.
Angry at himself.
Angry at his family.
Angry at his friends.
Angry at her.
She must have hated him to ignore him for that long, so he decided to mirror it toward her.
He didn't want to be angry at her. He didn't want to hurt her. He didn't want to lose their friendship.
But he just couldn't help himself.
That's why he considered himself a monster.
He put the blade away and started wiping blood off his arm.
As he was reaching for a second napkin, his phone vibrated.
"Hey, sorry for disappearing for so long"
"I just felt really bad and didn't feel like doing anything"
Why was he believing her?
"Are you okay?"
He had to respond somehow.
He felt like an idiot responding that fast.
"I'm as fine as usual"
For some reason he felt like an asshole writing that.
"Mind going for a walk?"
"You don't have to cover your arms"
"I'll take some bandages if you need them"