The sound of a car rushed by the quiet house, kicking up rain and sloshing it against the sidewalk. The house was silent but the sound of water being torn apart didn’t bother it.
Because it wasn’t the quiet of a sleeping, peaceful night; no, this was far more strained. It couldn’t be broken even if the roof caved in.
This was a war zone; a place of broken promises and deep regrets and apologies left unsaid. Someplace where the comforting feeling of Home fled long ago and in its place Prison stood reign.
There was no way to get away from it, no way to escape it. Just somewhere you knew you had to go to sleep and eat, but no words were exchanged with the people that lived there with you.
That was the worst part; the silence. The lack of communication. The lack of smiles and laughter and talking about how your day went. Because now it didn’t matter if your day was good or crappy.
It didn’t matter that you got a 67 on your math test and your heart was in pieces and you needed someone to talk to about it.
It didn’t matter if your best friend’s dog died and your capacity for sympathy lead you to cry about it like you lost your own.
It didn’t matter how you felt; it didn’t matter how broken or happy you were. All that mattered was the silence, the unspoken word, and no one dared to break it, no matter how necessary.
And even worse than that, you never knew how long it would last. It could be two days, a week, two weeks, even months without exchanging any parts of your day with each other.
Sooner or later you start to miss the simple dialogues you held with each other. The way you made each other aware of things you found fascinating or terrible or amazing.
How you would make an inside joke and the other would have tears forming in their eyes and a sore gut.
But that was over and all that was said was a simple hello or a grunt of passing acknowledgment.
You go to your room to brood, pout, or do things by yourself, away from the tension of being in the same room with that person.
In the silence, you feel your heart slowly tearing itself apart as it hardens day by day. Every word you fail to say makes it grow colder.
If that person really cared for me, why haven’t they said anything?
Maybe they did. Maybe they tried to talk and apologize and “work things out”.
But maybe you didn’t listen, so caught in the sound of your heart freezing over that you missed your chance at unthawing it. Maybe it’s too late; maybe it’s not.
Maybe you need to take initiative, maybe you need to try to create the oxygen in your suffocating surroundings because it’s not going to change any time soon.
Unless you put your foot out there, no one is going to bridge the gap; no one is going to walk the plank or take one for the team. No one is going to talk and that’s what you need right now.
You need communication, no matter how hard that might be to start. You need words. You need dialouge. You need to acknowledge the fact that you’re mad at each other.
You need to confess that there are things the other has done that you’re not happy about. But at the end of the day, you need to admit you want to fix this.
You want to destroy the coldness in your heart. You want to tear down this barrier you’ve built between yourselves.
You want to talk about things with each other and you hate feeling like you can’t.
You have to take the initiative to make things better. If you don’t, nothing will change. That’s what you're in desperate need of. Change. Make a change, alter your situation for the better.
There will be struggle. There will be tears. There may even be a little breaking before it gets better, but it will. Sometimes, you have to break old foundations to make new ones. Stronger ones.
Ones built of honesty, loyalty, and trust. Ones that won’t crumble under small fractures. Ones that can withstand a hurricane.
You have to obliterate the old before you can make the new; so rip your anger with each other to shreds and go forth with a new, strong foundation.
One that can withstand anything, one that can withstand eternity.