What He Needed
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regitataeHappy doesn't suit me.
Autoplay OFF  •  a year ago

What He Needed

by regitatae

He didn’t need you to love him.

Your affection and attention meant nothing. ‘Cause I am the reason why his days are as bleak; And he could never predict me coming.

There is nothing you could do to stop me.

I’m only going to let him screw things up. You were only able to divert his mind from me. I am something that you could never stop.

I gave him his manic days.

Times where he would feel invincible in every ways. Times where he could actually give something in return. Though, little did you know, it was only concern.

You’re only going to get yourself hurt, missy.

For I am the one who holds his emotions most of the time. I will make him feel like he’s drowning deep in the sea, and there is nothing you could do to save him.

This whole thing is a ticking time bomb, you see.

I will rain on his thoughts, make him feel unworthy. What do you do when you feel likewise? You push away the things you think you don’t deserve.

So, he will push you away with all his might,

because I am the demon that lives in his head. I am what they call an invisible illness; both deadly and vicious.

He didn’t need you to love him. He needed to be rid of me.

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bernardtwindwilGold CommaGranddad & story teller, tomthepo8.com
a year agoReply
@regitatae I surprised and delighted that you can write so beautifully and meaningfully in English. You have all the subtlety and nuance for which anyone could ask.

regitataeHappy doesn't suit me.
a year agoReply
@wethedreamers thank you very much! :)

wethedreamersGifted WriterAnd we're a million miles away.
a year agoReply
I love this so much.

regitataeHappy doesn't suit me.
a year agoReply
@johnchang @sydney thank you! @bernardtwindwil thank you so much for the feedback, English isn't exactly my native language, that's why I'm still struggling at times, but thank you nonetheless!

sydneyVerifiedco-creator of Commaful
a year agoReply
Wow the images and words you choose. So stunning and powerful. I could feel the raw emotion and darkness

johnchangBronze Commajust a man discovering his superpowers
a year agoReply
This reminds me of some of Jenny Lawson's insights into mental illness, just as engaging but a much darker tone, of course.

bernardtwindwilGold CommaGranddad & story teller, tomthepo8.com
a year agoReply
This is very well written. It holds true for all of those who are walking wounded. The description of conflict without possible resolution is brilliant. The poem was great unyil the last two verses in the final stanza. "He didn’t need you to love him. He needed me to be rid of." Could you turn that final phrase around into a more melodic rather than that bassackward sentence. "He needed to be rid of me." seems like it would be less awkward. Great poem.