Alone in this hotel for the first time in years is strange to me. Constantly having people around me, always having my calendar filled for me by people I've never met, but pay nonetheless.
Going from one city to the next to entertain. Making people feel, if only for a short time, a little better. But at the end of the night, I've got nothing left for myself.
I leave it all on the stage every night. I've worked so hard for so long to get where I am now, to only realize how lonely it is at the top..
People scream that they love me as they see me, or throw themselves at me any where I go, but none know me. Only knowing what they read, thinking THATS the true me.
I try to do things to warm my soul.
Sex, drugs, partying, buying expensive things, but never being able to enjoy any of it, because to enable myself to have these things, I have to give YOU my all.
And at the end of the night, another hotel room, another location. But tonight I decided to be left alone..
I dont like my thoughts