Ashamed. (Poem)
Ashamed. (Poem) poems stories

novice_key These were all originally my rap lyrics.
Autoplay OFF   •   2 years ago
School has changed me--for better or for worse, whatever type it chose, it still gave me a bad curse.

Ashamed. (Poem)

Warning, more cussing than usual!


I understand the pain

Caused by this stupid awful game.

Understand the rules,

Man, dontcha think I’m ashamed?

Wake up every morning just like the last.

Something always feels wrong,

Like a blast from the past.

Close my eyes wishing

That soon it will pass,

But open my mind realizing that f*ck:

That sh*t just doesn’t last.

Reality strikes me like a thunderstorm,

I can’t fight this battle, man

I ain’t no Dragonborn.

I can’t scream all of my issues away in the sky

Can’t sweep the crumbs under the rug no matter how hard I try.

I’m just not supplied with that specific fortunate type of thing.

I got a loving family that don’t care if I’m gay,

And caring friends that know something has really changed.

I got a roof over my head,

And food to last weeks.

Up-to-date technology that can keep me company.

I can’t complain.

Yet I do,

That’s why I feel so ashamed.

Let me be honest here.

I would give up everything I have

All just to feel happy again.

My room, my shoes,

The clothes slacked on my back.

All of my items just to feel whole again.

School has changed me--

For better or for worse.

Whatever type it chose,

It still gave me a bad curse.

Gave me insecurities about my face,

And a bunch of bad habits of tying on names.

My parents think I’m alright,

I’m okay.

Just a bit annoyed and tired of playing charades.

And I guess they’re right.

Had a kid tell me once that they weren’t gonna do their part,

And another that said, “Fuck it,

I’ll leave you in the dark.”

I feel so ashamed.

I don’t have no right

To voice my issues.

Stress on words,

That’s in the queue.

There are not enough cuss words to elaborate the pain,

Just a bunch of shits, goddammits, fucking—I’ve had it!

So don’t waste your time,

I ain’t worth it.

I'm just a little spoiled rich kid,

Ashamed in myself because of my status,

And the unavailability of tearing out my cravats.


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