yearning

. by neutralfleur

what in the world can i do?

i wish to write

pen down words

scribble on all sorts of paper

bringing words to light

making them dance from my pencil

i want to make others feel something in the pits of their stomachs, like butterflies awakening to a beautiful spring

i want to make them tear up, think for hours

but i mostly want to express myself

the inner workings of my art gallery

the ingenious i need to cultivate like a weed in all their perfect gardens

i wish to write everything i fail to say

yet the process is so long

the road to get there is so dark

and it’ll only light up when i’ve reached the end

i do not measure my success on whether i will be remembered or not

but to think that i may not be able to smear my fantasies and dreams and heartbreak on to somebody’s favourite poetry collection shatters every goal i’ve painted in coats of gold

i don’t understand

and the yearning continues