Atoms, the word was no stranger. A common chapter in highschool, it was covered in both chemistry and physics. Well, atoms are the building blocks of everything, after all. If atoms are a little bigger, I could probably play them like lego.
"Hey, earth to Mark?" My best friend, Carrie, waved a hand in front of me. I tore my eyes from the window and faced her.
"Gosh, you're paler than me, who is anemic!" She said and grasped my hand. "C'mon, the bell just rang seconds ago, we're gonna miss the good food!"
"Can't you tell your mom to be human again and make us lunchboxes?" I asked. Carrie frowned, looking at me like I got blamed for stealing her mom's cookies. Suddenly, she hugged me.
"Oh, Mark, I wish it's that simple!" She released me and looked me in the eye. "Umm anyway, let's eat!" She didn't let me say anything more and pulled me. Throughout the hallway, people were calling me, us, names, like usual.
Carrie said that they became mean after my accident, but when I asked why, she wouldn't tell me. I had an idea, though. It was because they couldn't see my hand. They thought I was handicapped. Well, they were wrong, I still felt my left hand.
I just needed to learn how to order the atoms to settle down and be my hand again. And when I succeed, I can tell Carrie's mom how I did it and make her human again. Carrie won't be sad anymore.
Yes, all the atoms building my hand were still around, in abundance, so one day I wouldn't be handicapped anymore. Same with Carrie's mom, she would return.
Because the atoms building us humans are everywhere.
After eating, I took out my supplements : calcium, phosphorus, sulphur-- all the atoms that made the human body, to make my arm grow faster. Carrie looked at me intently as I gulped water along with the supplements. I wiped my mouth and gave her a questioning stare.
Carrie raised her arms sheepishly. "you know, Mark, I'm sort of glad you believe in atoms so much. You believe my mom is still here, right? Doing everyday life, listening... watching?" I nodded, still confused. "You don't believe me too?"
Carrie quickly shook her head. "No no, I believe you. So... even if you can't see me, you'll still feel my atoms, right?" I nodded. She laughed and hugged me. "Then I don't need to worry, I can be your friend forever"
That was highschool. Carrie and I barely survived by looking out for each other.
And I am now twenty seven years old, questioning whether my belief in atoms are real. My left arm has disappeared. I can't feel it anymore.
When I freaked out, my therapist told me I was feeling phantom limb, not my atom shenanigan theory.
But I can't believe it!
I mustn't believe it!
How can I?
If my atom theory is wrong, then...
My arm won't come back
Carrie's mom won't come back
Carrie won't come back!
My best friend isn't watching over me! So I simply don't believe it. And I am rewarded with pain on my invisible left hand. It's back to strengthen my faith.