sundays

blurry smiles,

blurry smiles, distant features:

blurry smiles, distant features: in the mirror I see

blurry smiles, distant features: in the mirror I see a foreign creature.

brick

brick by

brick by brick

I build a wall

I build a wall to stand

I build a wall to stand on the edge

I build a wall to stand on the edge and let myself fall.

needles and thread

needles and thread to stitch it back:

the pieces of me

the pieces of me that are tinged in black.

an extra chair

an extra chair at the table,

an extra chair at the table, still unused,

an extra chair at the table, still unused, still with its label;

unopened bottles

unopened bottles of lemon iced tea

unopened bottles of lemon iced tea lining my fridge

unopened bottles of lemon iced tea lining my fridge in rows of three--

and where do I fit in

and where do I fit in to this equation

will my train ever

will my train ever arrive at this station?

and all divine purpose

and all divine purpose from up above,

all catastrophising

all catastrophising from the lack of love:

when winter morning

when winter morning kisses frosted stones

the

the sadness

the sadness settles

the sadness settles into

the sadness settles into my

the sadness settles into my bones

the sadness settles into my bones.

The Samaritans tel: 116 123