Buried under a heart full of pain, entombed 6 feet underground, lying in a coffin awaiting its next life.
Every time they come up to you the thought of being rude, the thought of being hated consumes you. You can't stand one more person to leave so you have to dig it up.
You have to give life to what you killed, you have to bring up what you buried, you have to undo the funeral you gave it. You have to replay what you dread every day. You have to smile.
It's exhausting to have to unbury a smile every day just keep them around. It makes your face hurt and that's not even the worst part, you hate lying.
You don't want to do it anymore, you ask yourself every day "how many more times can I fake a smile? How many more times can I tell a lie before they all realize I'm fake?
" It's scary to think that in the end, the pain might bury you instead. They're unaware of the war in your heart, they're unaware of the pain killing you each day.
What they think they know about you is fake. What they don't see they'll never understand and it tears you up inside.
You need someone to fill the gap, but you push them all away, you're not afraid of being alone... you're afraid of losing what you love.
You don't want to hurt anyone so you keep away but in reality, YOU'RE THE ONE IN PAIN! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO'S SUFFERING YOU'RE THE ONE WHO'S HURTING INSIDE.
No one will listen, no one gets you, they don't ask you how you are because they just don't care.
You could explain it every day for a year and they wouldn't understand it, not even if it hit them on the head.
They don't care that you're dying inside, they don't care that you're in pain, they move on with their happy jolly day like there's not a problem in the world.
They don't care about you, and they'll never understand the war behind your smile