I spent so much time, my whole life, in fact, figuring out who I was
Just to have you say I was, wrong
Just to have you tell me that I chose this?
You said it's a trend, a choice, I'm offending them, I'm looking for attention
But yelling "SHE/HER" only makes things worse
You aren't curing me
I'm not the daughter you thought I was
I never have been
I never will be
I'm drowning in my own body
I'm decomposing and you continue to yell lies to me
You aren't right in this situation
You're ignorant and wrong
You expect me to talk to you but I can't, because of this
I hear your words on repeat in my head "girl girl girl girl girl girl girl"
"That community gets offended by kids experimenting"
That's the only way anyone can know for sure,
You're yelling at me that I'm a girl while tears threaten me with a pricking sensation
My eyes water as I quietly walk upstairs
I feel unsafe, suffocated, lonely, unheard, confused
Aren't you supposed to love me no matter what?
unconditional love and support you said
I feel nothing but betrayal and fear
I wasn't ready and you outed me
I don't understand you're lack of respect and privacy
"girl" "she" "her" "woman" "female"
I'm not who you think I am and I'm not ever going to be enough for you
This poem doesn't convey the fear and vulnerability I felt
Trans kids don't owe you an explanation (Trans is anyone that identifies with something other than their gender assigned at birth)
We don't owe you a "coming out"
This poem doesn't show your aggression, the way you ripped into me the day you knew I was weak
I wish I could say I forgive you. But I don't. And I won't.