A head full of smoke
A head full of smoke thoughts stories
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mochaThree sugars, please.
Autoplay OFF  •  a year ago
You're overthinking it again.

A head full of smoke

It's supposed to be so easy.

This is what you do. What you want to do. What you can do.

It's your life.

And yet, when push comes to shove...

Nothing.

Where did everything go?

Who are you now? What is it that you do?

It's not fear. No.

There's nothing to indicate fear. Your breaths are calm, your hands aren't shaking. Your eyes are focused.

Until then.

Your eyes drift away.

That network of thoughts in your head just merged together into a cloud.

A miasma. Grey, with the slightest hints of pink, green, thoughts, feelings, ideas, dreams...

But when you put your hand in, expecting to pluck out something, anything...

Dust.

Who are you now? What is it that you do?

It's just a question.

Why is this hurting you so much? Is it really that difficult to answer?

It slipped out of your hands so easily. Just like that, gone.

You continue sifting through the sand. Shuttering, trembling.

But it's gone.

How deep does this go? Do you even know?

Who are you now? What is it that you do?

It's not like you actually forgot.

It's there, somewhere. You can't see it, hear it, smell it, touch it.

But you feel it, somehow. Like a gentle warmth in the air.

Gentle warmth, rapidly replacing itself with cold winter rain.

Unpleasant. Get out of here. Get to cover.

But where's the cover?

What's even going on now?

You drifted too deep into the smog.

You're lost in it. Your thought swirl around you like a haze.

A distant memory here, a silly little concept there.

That character you always wanted to make.

How tall are they?

What hair colour? Personality? Idealism? Relationships?

What was her name?

"Her"?

Him?

Who?

Who are you now? What is it that you do?

And then you snap back.

Welcome home.

The fog hasn't gone anywhere.

Neither did the question.

They're both here.

And they're both mountains you can't cross over.

Because you still don't know the answer.

Your eyes are clear as crystal.

But they can't see a damn thing.

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