Þrimskviða norse mythology stories
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mllechambers engineer/cartoonist/writer/...
Autoplay OFF   •   3 years ago
A poetic take on the thrilling tale of murder, theft and cross-dressing


One fateful day in Asaheim,

Thor slept soundly as the sun did shine.

Once he awoke, to his dismay,

He saw his hammer had been taken away.

To Loki’s hall he quickly sped,

“Loki! You snake! I’ll have your head!”

“Whatever’s the matter, oh brother dear?”

“My hammer is gone so it must be in here!”

Loki looked at Thor with earnest eyes,

“I didn’t take it, I tell you no lies”

“Well if you don’t have it, where can it be?”

Loki watched the horizon, beyond the apple trees.

Jotunheim stood behind mountains and plains.

“The jotuns might have it” Loki did explain,

‘I’ll borrow Freyja’s cape, and fly there at once,

I’m sure the jotuns will be back from their hunts.”

Freyja lent him her cape, but bid him take care,

And before long Loki soared through the air;

Past mountains and mist and into Jotunheim…

Now, to find the jotun guilty of the crime.

As he entered the hall he was met with a surprise,

Thor’s hammer, Mjolnir, was there before his eyes!

“Your highness,” said Loki, “That hammer is not yours,

I recognise it distinctly, that hammer is Thor’s.”

The jotun king laughed and furrowed his brow,

“Perhaps it was once, but it is mine now!”

Loki thought fast and replied to the king,

“Would you exchange for something like a sword, or a ring?”

“I don’t want weapons or jewellery or land,

All I would want is Freyja’s fine hand.

Come back with fair Freyja and make her my bride,

Until then, this hammer will stay by my side.”

Loki was doubtful, but still flew back home,

Back to find Freyja, in her hall, all alone.

Hastily Loki explained what was said

And meekly asked Freyja if she would be wed.

Freyja, haughtily, did quickly reply

“Me? Marry him? I’d rather die!”

Said Loki “I can arrange that my dear…

Unless you have a better idea?”

“To no man shall go my hand,

Much less to one from a Jotun land.

If for his hammer Thor is so keen,

Why doesn’t he become the jotun queen?”

Loki paused and thought a while,

Then turned back with a quick, sly smile.

“Freyja, my dear, you are not only stunning,

And graceful and brave, you’re especially cunning!

Go bring me a dress, the largest you own!

And ribbons, a veil, all fit for a throne!

I’ll go fetch Thor, while you find those things.”

So off took Loki with his falcon wings.

Once the effect of the shock had died down

Thor did agree to wearing a gown.

His head was covered with veils and braids

And Loki escorted him as his handmaid.

Though Thor’s bright beard could clearly be seen,

The jotun saw nothing but his beautiful queen.

The wedding took place, much food was eaten,

The amount Thor consumed would hardly be beaten.

Six salmon, an ox and three barrels if mead;

More than a true queen ever would need!

When the party was over and the hammer brought out

Thor leapt from his seat and gave out a shout.

“What a marvelous gift for my wedding day!

Now I have mjolnir, I’ll make you all pay!”

His dresses and veils and beads he did shed,

Picked up his hammer, and left each jotun dead.

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