Addict
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mipoet
mipoetMy psychiatrist says he'd vote for me.
Autoplay OFF  •  a year ago
It comes down to control.

Addict

I used to drink each day,

now I just smoke pot.

At my core, is an addict.

I must have something,

anything, all the time.

Work is a challenge.

I have to stay sober.

Why is that a struggle?

I started cutting myself.

The endorphin rush of pain,

is my latest temptation.

Fighting constant urges,

but can I make them leave?

My self medicating is not working.

It comes down to control.

Control over how I feel.

Control over something,

anything, all the time.

I never feel enough of it.

It’s why I quit drinking,

I felt my grip slipping.

It scared me.

It’s why I have will now,

the cutting scared me too.

But how long can will carry me?

Seeking help outside.

My path is unsustainable.

Relief comes too slow.

This change is hard work.

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