There's nothing that can save me now
I've gone down the rabbit hole
It's dark down here
Turn on the lights
But wait... you can't
There aren't lights down here where I call home
Nobody understands the world I roam
Blades litter the floor
I can't wash the blood out. That was my favourite shirt.
My arms are itching to be let out.
They want freedom as much as I do
I don't always want the pain. Sometimes I want the memories
This isn't some roller coaster you can ride with a free pass
I don't want a free pass
I want the depression
I want the pain of having a terrible self-image
I hate myself and I don't know why
Because I'm stuck down the rabbit hole
You can't love yourself when all you know is darkness
This is who you are now
Accept it and move on
And risk everything you've ever had
Because in the end, it is your choice
Nobody truly can stop you
Just pick up the blade and slide it across the canvas
It is outstretched, ready to be painted
But it will only be painted with guilt
Because you couldn't do it.
One simple task.
You could have ended it all
But you chose not to
Why? For others?
Do it for you. Everything is about you now.