The Voice in the Pandemic
The Voice in the Pandemic  covid 19 stories
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mikki_
mikki_ #DreadfulCollection is my poetry May2020
Autoplay OFF   •   a year ago
The collection "Dreadful" has many aspects to it including the Coronavirus-19 world health pandemic.
"Voice in the Pandemic" is one poem about the emotions of seeing the world as you once saw it, changing in a way there was no way to compare to prior to this. For many of us, we cling to faith for comfort, others science, but I do believe during this, we have all felt like we've lost our voices in the pandemic.

The Voice in the Pandemic

It feels like time has stopped completely.

A hopeless void that I am constantly trying to fill with meaningless activities -

Mind-numbing, pretending I cannot feel what's going on around me.

Sleep.

Even in my dreams I see the world as it is now,

Masks everywhere, markets empty,

Eyes worried.

When I wake up from sleep, I am online.

Searching the news for the latest statistics,

The latest deaths,

Scouring everything for a single shred of hope the end of this is near.

It's not.

I feel my depression sneak in,

My floor in my room must have an outline of me for how often I lay curled up

In the one corner of the room where tears overtake me, and I cry.

I cry for my health,

I cry for those who have died,

who are sick,

I cry for the forgotten,

I cry for the poor,

I cry for those who don't think anyone will cry for them.

My anxiety reaches new peaks and my paintings make no sense.

I can't focus on TV,

I don't sleep.

Instead I sit outside

Smoking trying to focus my breathing on an inhale,

Hold one, two, three,

Exhale,

Until my brain can focus again.

Sometimes I just sit in the garden watching the sun move across the sky.

Wishing it would pick me up with them.

Like if I stood on my tippy-toes I might just be able to reach it.

And on my days I feel numb and normal,

I make my curls extra curly,

I wear bright makeup,

And I go out into the new normal world.

I exchange the worried eyes with others,

I keep my head down low, pull my mask up higher, gloves on tighter.

And each time I get home I relight my Mother Mary candle vigil, and I pray all the prayers,

I count my blessings,

I pray Hail Mary,

I do the Rosary,

And I get ready to repeat the same day;

Just a new day of the week,

Tomorrow.

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