"Mr. Zuckerberg, so...Facebook is free right? If so....how are you worth....let me see.....1,2,3....holy shit is that...9 zeros?? That's like a few hundred billion...."
Zuck: "Senator. We run ads."
"That doesn't explain the high net worth?"
Zuck: "Senator. We run a lot of ads."
"What is Snapchat? My daughter won't stop talking about it."
Zuck: "Senator. Instagram you mean?"
"No...it's this thing with a yellow ghost on it"
Zuck: "Senator. Tell her to use Instagram."
"My toaster won't work....does it have anything related to Cambridge Analytica?"
Zuck: "Senator. I think your toaster wasn't plugged in."
"Who created you?"
Zuck: "Senator. Elon Mus.....I mean.....I was born on Earth."
"I have this app idea. It lets you put radio on the internet. Can you help me with it? I can take care of the business side"
Zuck: "Senator. No. We copy successful apps. Not build new ones"
"I'm trying to sign up for Facebook, but I can't figure out how to get it."
Zuck: "Senator. That is a computer. You need to turn it on before you can use it."
"I'm on Facebook but I don't get it. Why do I have no friends?"
Zuck: "Senator. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯"
"I think I deleted the internet by accident when I was trying to install some videos from a website. Does Facebook help with that?"
Zuck: "Senator. What you do in your personal time is up to you. But the internet is still running."
Zuck: "Senator. Always"
"Quick. Are you Mark Zuckerberg v2.3.0 or v2.4.1? This is important"
Mark: Oh hi, Rick. I'm v2.3.0
Crap he needs an upgrade
Oh, hi Senators
You saw nothing.