I remember you as if it were yesterday, only to find out it’s been almost 1-year since I lost you. I lost the best part of me to you.
I remember the beautiful smile you made every time I looked at you as if you were the only one in the world. To me you where my entire world and my one and only.
I remember that beautiful laugh, I remember our mid-night drives as we pass through Rifles main streets with the music loud enough for only me and you to hear.
It was one of those moments that you knew deep inside you would remember forever, ridiculous hu.
Most people say that nothing lasts forever but is that true because is sure as hell don’t feel that way.
I remember our first encounter, Rifle High School at the steps that connect the office to the cafeteria.
I remember bumping into you, only to look into those dark eyes, I knew you were damaged, but I didn’t care for you were worth the risk.
I believed in you and I trusted you, I gave you my heart for I knew deep inside that we would be together forever only to find out that forever only lasts a couple of months.
I remember the way you hugged me as if the world was crumbling around her and I was her last hope… holding me tightly and not letting go for anything.
They say that we do crazy things for love, so I wonder, did I do something insane for love, was giving you my heart insane,
for all you did was throw it from the top of the earth and let it shatter into a million pieces.
I remember the feeling when I lost my heart the day you left my life, It felt as if I was thrown into a fiery hell, burning everything from the outside in,
losing all my nerves making me numb to everything and any kind of feeling.
You took away my trust, my trust in falling in love for all I hear when someone says “I’m falling in love” all I hear is “falling” for that’s all I did,
I fell and fell into the darkness that has no end and only more darkness the deeper you fall.
I remember that angle face, innocent to all bad and savior to all in need, I felt as if you were that to me, an angle that came to save me from all the bad and complete me and you did just that,
I just never knew that when an angle left they would take everything that made you, you and some more.
As if they were just charging me for saving me but all they did was save me some time before I would go back to falling into the abstinence of the darkness,
but you failed to realize that now I’m falling harder and faster than ever before, for when you left you took more than a part of me.
You took my soul, you took my personality, you took my sense to fall in love again and now I am lost in the darkness and there is no return now.
I remember the way you looked at me as if I was perfect even though I was far from it, yet you still took me in all broken and far from perfection, making me love you even more.
Taking me in with all my imperfections, turning them into gifts in those wonderful eyes that are more beautiful than the northern lights that gloom at night.
I remember the day I lost myself in the darkens and decided to call it home for there will never be anyone who can save me now because I no longer know who to trust, who to yell for help,
who to go with when I need a hug and what I feel anymore, for you have taken all that from me.
They say the world keeps moving forward but that’s not true, that’s your world, mine still rotates but has no sun to illuminate it,
so it is basically not moving forward but more like moving with the darkness not being able to photosynthesize nor grow and heal but more like self-die and wither away into the darkness,
for that is all there is looking forward.
Don’t you remember the way we would touch, the way we would kiss, as if we were the big bang and everything around us was being created with immense love we had for one another?
I see beautiful objects, beautiful places, beautiful views,
and have the most beautiful experiences only to have it bombarded with memories of you and all the beautiful memories we had together You were a prima ballerina assoluta and I was
your premier danseur noble, or so I thought, you were more like a shooting star flashing by my life, amazing to experience at the moment,
but once it leaves at the blink of an eye your left staring back at the darkness. See that’s what I remember, our relationship ending in the blink of an eye.
Now I live every day wondering if I’ve lived without you for so long that the pain is a feeling I’m used to or is it that I have learned to live for you, hoping that one day you will come back.
In reality, she never will come back to my arms.
Maybe that’s why I can’t accept the fact that we no longer together “The Perfect Two” and nothing nor anyone could replace your perfection because no one nor anything can be as perfect as
you were to me.
Remember that beautiful blue dress, with the first ever pockets, the way you opened that door only to be captivated by your beauty,
it was at that moment that I had forgotten how to breathe because you were a Dimond that had taken me eighteen years to find and now that I found it the beauty of feeling it, seeing,
and being able to cherish it left me profoundly speechless.
Dancing was her specialty not mine, but I followed along.
Slow dancing with you was as if time was non-existent and as if I was on top of all the stars in the galaxy and nothing nor anyone mattered at that moment because everything went dark and
you were my light guiding me through the darkness. It was in that darkness that you taught me how to feel true love, how to express myself, and how to love someone just as much.
With all the trust in the world but before I could reach the tunnel of light you let go and left me in the darkness were, I lost it all, all the love and all the trust gone,
lost and never to be found again. It all felt so real, was that what made the cut bone deep.
There are shadows plastered on my wall, where I can see day in and day out as if it’s trying to remind me of all that I have lost that day.
Love, trust, happiness, confidence, and my personal well being all left in pieces scattered in the darkness.
December a month with so many lights out in the streets, in houses, on trees, in metal shaped like reindeer yet I’m still left in the darkness alone.
My heart turned into a rainstorm in the ibis of the night with tiny water particles scattered and no chance of catching any of them, left with one option but to sit there and watch,
powerless and a million piece heart all around.