Trapped in my mind alone
Trapped in my mind alone pain stories

loremasterSeeker of life’s truths and writing it
Autoplay OFF  •  a year ago
Coming to the end

Trapped in my mind alone

I write this to all of you who feel alone and isolated

For all my life I have felt rejected and alone,

Assaulted all through school

Ignored at college and jobs, even in the Army I was not accepted by my squad

Though I was married I was treated like I was not good enough no matter what I did

Cheated on, verbally abused, and when I needed some one the most abandoned

I can’t trust anymore even though I try to reach out, in the end I’m either rejected or used

I want to love, to know someone can accept me and want me around

I can give everything for a loved one and want for nothing in return

But every night, every day the depression, crushing isolation and self rejection grows larger and darker

My mind screams to just not live, to go asleep and never wake up and no longer face a dead life

This past week each night I collapsed in tears unable to stand, barely breathing or control left as I shake and hate myself

Every thought is of knowing what love should be and knowing no one wants me

With age should come wisdom but mine has turned against me as my strength fades faster and my will is no more

I can’t look at mirrors, I can’t stand to hear my voice, I can’t stand the knowledge I am no one, a outcast, alone

There so little of me left undamaged I know no one would want a destroyed person

My cries go unanswered, and slowly the feeling start to win, maybe the world would be better with out me

Or maybe it wouldn’t even know if I was gone, as a burning tear filled with regrets and failure leaves my eye, wishing I could just say a final goodbye

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