12 years ago today
12 years ago today daughter stories

lizziebevisI remain loyal until the end...
Autoplay OFF  •  10 months ago
I wrote this poem as I remember today, one of the most beautiful and traumatic days of my life as a mother.
It is my daughters birthday.

I thought that I would share it with you.

12 years ago today

It was a Monday morning as I walked through those doors, along with my hospital bag, I was a bag of nerves not knowing what was in store.

I waited for you all morning and afternoon, Nil by mouth I was. I remember the thirst and hunger as I laid on my bed in that simple hospital room. I remember how I rubbed my tummy, whilst anticipating my life as your mummy.

At 16:20 I remember I was taken into the theatre room, with Videne I was scrubbed. The lovely midwife was called Sandy and the anaesthetist looked like Orlando Bloom.

I remember the tinge of pain as the cannula punctured through my skin, Intravenous saline quenched my thirst and relieved my parched veins.

At this point it was frightening, I shouldn't have looked but I did. The epidural needle was of a size that most people would forbid!

But I sat there bravely on the edge of the operating table, knowing that this surgical team were all trained and able. I took a deep breath and I was fine as Orlando skilfully fed that needle in between the vertebrae of my spine.

I was then laid on that table feeling uncomfortably numb, as the screen was erected over my tummy as I waited there to become your mum.

The surgeon oh she was lovely, she looked at me with her kind eyes and said, I am going to start the cesarean now, and I was suddenly filled with dread. With courage I looked up at the ceiling and thought about this baby that I would love, but the shiny chrome light above gave an unwanted view and I couldn't look.

The surgeon took care with the procedure and Sandy kept me calm by stroking my hair. It all felt surreal, just like a dream and under my breath I said a prayer. The operating team worked tirelessly, as they monitored the vitals of you and me.

At 17:15 It all happened in slow motion I heard the whoosh of liquid spill and there was quite a commotion. You were still asleep my sweet, My worry couldn't be denied as you were rubbed and given oxygen until at last you cried.

You had 10 tiny fingers and 10 tiny toes. The most beautiful dark blue eyes and a tiny pixie nose. I held you gently against my chest as I was carefully stitched back together. My beautiful baby daughter who after 9 months I could treasure.

It's strange how I remember so much, but it doesn't seem like long ago. 12 years since this all happened and how much I still love you so. Lizzie Bevis

To my not so little beautiful young lady. Continue to shine and be happy. With all my love Mum xxx

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