Junior Year
Junior Year button poetry stories
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laynearogers
laynearogers Community member
Autoplay OFF   •   7 months ago
The laughter sounded better when it vibrated through his chest

Junior Year

I remember the rough sheets of a bed on the floor

The sound of video games and voices past midnight

They played while I rested

Worn out by my own lack of routine and late nights in my studio

But I always went over when he called

An average Thursday night with the promise of a Friday without class

I didn't play the game

But he wanted me in the group

My unimpressive sweatpants and hoodie twisted around my limbs as I lay next to his upright frame

The group had a rolling commentary of whatever was on the screen

I let my tired mind wander, edging close to a dream

Waiting for his reassuring touch

With every visit, no matter how I disengaged

He'd connect

A light brush of my hair

A quick squeeze of my calf

A reassuring graze of my hand

He was distracted, woven into the nightly narrative of games and unsavory jokes

Acting his age

But every so often, as if a timer clicked in his head, he'd check on me

My heart would leap

I'd feel a peace whisper over me, louder than the noise of college students

I'd try to sit beside him when we watched movies

I wanted our legs to touch

He would make room for me on the couch at parties

I wanted to rest my head against his shoulder

The laughter sounded better when it vibrated through his chest

I don't know if I was needy or he was attentive

I just remember the hot tears and searing pain when he stopped talking to me

A void where a cup once overflowed

I lost his love

He was right to walk away

But that didn't make his absence sting less

It meant it was my fault I had to walk around campus

Each day, touring a museum of memories

Until I drove home from graduation

Thinking I'd never talk to my best friend again

The closure never came

But as the years unraveled the stories regained their sweetness

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