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lalalabutterfly Hopelessly lost but forever hopeful.
Autoplay OFF   •   3 years ago
I worked really hard for these rips in my jeans.


My feelings don't matter, my hope and my pain

So I silently sit, taking too long to explain

I stutter, I blush, I hide and I fade

I don't have a reason, I'm just too afraid

I've gotten good at rejection and know how to act

My illusion in place, having never once cracked

I perform like expected, smiles over a heavy heart

I retreat once it's over and get taken apart.

I worked really hard for these rips in my jeans

There are some among us who won't know what that means

Every move and word planned with no room for an error

One little step forward, I retreat in my terror

No one can know how big efforts can be

To hide something simple and such a part of me

You could cut me and run or play games with my smile

But I won't bat an eyelid, I'll survive it with style.

I don't take any pride in what I didn't achieve

I can sniff out a liar like you wouldn't believe

I know all of your games and I follow your thoughts

Even though my own soul may be tangled in knots

I've schooled my face over years of malpractice

Even when those I trusted used me for target practice

No amount of my pain could make this closed book open

Even if every bone in my body were broken.

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