When I was 12, I went to a music festival with my fiddle instructor A girl named Abbie was supposed to come with us She was 15, but I hoped we would be friends
After an hour at the festival I asked my instructor why Abbie never showed "She had to go to her best friend's funeral." "Her friend hung herself from a tree."
I was 12, and I knew death happened, I knew people killed themselves I did not know 15 year olds with best friends who went to music festivals killed themselves That was not supposed to happen
She was young, she had a best friend who cared Why would she do that? How could Abbie have not noticed? How do you not know your best friend is ready to kill themselves?
I was 12, and I vowed to never let that happen to any friend I had
I was 16, and I met a boy who showed me the scars on his arms and told me of pain and despair And I promised myself I would help him He would not be alone, I would do anything I could to help him
I was 16, and I did not know about adult things like emotional manipulation Gaslighting Self-destructive behavior
I did not know that sometimes trying to save someone from themselves Is like swimming out to a drowning person
They push you underwater and stand on you To try to survive And you both drown
I was 19, and I stared at myself in the mirror I saw emptiness, a husk drained dry And I said enough
I betrayed him by walking away To get my head above water again And he will never forgive me