i have been running for five years; running a race i thought i would never win, one where the finish line kept creeping further and further along toward the horizon,
so far that i could have sworn it disappeared into oblivion long ago. and then, suddenly, i caught my breath.
life has quite the interesting way of tearing people away, only to bring them back together again.
this notion too often leaves me with the sensation of being a puppet on the strings of fate, but now i realize this can only be true if i grant it permission.
what once was,
never will be; i am using this today to empower me instead of allowing it to drown me in a malicious sea of torture that i used to succumb to on the daily like it was the latest trend.
racking my buzzing brain in attempt to make sense of events has always been something which has allowed me a sense of peace and comfort, but in this race,
absolutely nothing has gone according to plan.
this has been one that i had to journey through terrains of everything from relentless blizzards categorized by each and every time “just friends”, and “nothing serious” came out of your mouth,
to humid deserts with blistering sun beating down on me every second of every day, categorized by each impassioned glare in my direction.
and truly, i know that this adventure of mine is far from over. the difference is that now, i take this in stride. i walk with purpose.
i am not in solitary confinement, my path is not a prison cell. my inhales and exhales are not monitored. you do not own me anymore.