I'm going to start this by saying my girlfriend broke up with me on Friday the 13th. Ironic right? Now my girlfriend was beautiful, amazing, intelligent, creative and all consuming.
But she has depression. And anxiety. Which is absolutely not a problem at all, only for her because she has to suffer under it.
The problem is due to my own mental illnesses and inability to seek help, only heavily leaning on the shoulder of my already suffering girlfriend.
She broke up with me because she couldn't do it anymore. I hurt her too much.
I just can't stop loving her. She says lets be friends but how can I be friends with someone who owns my heart? She says that the break-up is final, that she couldn't date me like this.
But maybe, there is a possibility further down the road that we could get back together, as long as I don't drown her in my own sinking problems.
Although, she also doesn't like to give me hope, because she thinks it will hurt me more. But baby, this complete and utter cut-off with no explanation has never hurt more.
Having hope, and coming to realise that she doesn't want to get back together will not hurt more than this.
I'm in love with her. And she always said she loved me back.
The problem is I'm having trouble believing her.
The good news though is that after 6 years of severe depression, anxiety and stress, I am finally seeing a psychologist! I might wait to speak to my now ex-girlfriend until then. I hope I'm okay.
I hope she's okay.