At the Moment
At the Moment depression stories
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johnnykguy
johnnykguy Atmosphere, emotions, development.
Autoplay OFF   •   2 months ago
How I've been feeling lately

At the Moment

I have dipped in degrees

Now even the warmth will freeze me

Terrified on a daily basis

Everything is fading my life stuck in stasis

I keep running into walls, I'm trapped

Running out of money I'm tapped

Running out of distractions to see

I want to be someone else instead of me

I keep sucking myself into games

At least there I can win and have no shame

Time and time again my efforts aren't enough

I'm alone in this house where there's no love

I keep having to ask for help

But I just want to see I can carry myself

Most of the people think I'm only good for one song

After years of trying to prove them wrong

Maybe they're right, so I give up the fight.

My own undoing is my simple sight

They take their nails and keep raking me down

I keep wondering why people want me around

The sound of piercing blades,

My space, theirs to invade

It's scary what people can do

So I'm scared of trusting after what I've been through

All I ever wanted was to connect

Who knew manipulation and love could intersect

It's not everyone, but I think I'm done

I've failed myself again, maybe this is how it ends

Where I awoke, now I sleep

I have all the time to weep

but this cycle is killing me

the hours are gone, I'm still not free

For all I know, this may not last

I'm sick of living in the past

This is just what I feel at the moment

Those familiar things, the energy I've spent

Trying to change it all

When I'm so close to getting out, I fall

Back to where I started from

I'm sick of hurting, please make me numb

I've had enough

Who's gonna really listen this far

They've packed their bags got in their car

I'm only good to use when you want me

To write another version of a song that's free

I'm just done with trying my best

I'll never be as good as the rest

Life is hard I never figured it out

The greedy win some know what success is about

They're not all bad but you get what I mean

I just wish I had myself to lean on

I'm just tired and I need a break

I don't know how much more I can take

Sorry that I wasted your time with this

Now go watch something that you miss

10,000 people won't care if I fade away

At the moment life is too high a price for me to pay

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