I'd be lying if I said I never felt something towards you. I felt so many different emotions with you and experienced so flipping much.
I'm not sure if you'll ever see this but I thought I might as well say it. I felt so much negative emotions with you such as pain, anger, betrayal, jealousy, and sadness.
But I also had hella positive emotions as well. Such as pure joy, excitement, happiness, cockiness, and even a point where I was convinced that I loved you.
I'm still not sure if I truly loved you but I was so convinced that I was head over heels in love with you. I was just scared that you didn't like me back.
And everytime I said something, I ruined it. I just didn't know how to handle everything. I pretended to be cold thinking you'd like me more.
To the point that I didn't even know how to show that I actually loved the paragraphs you wrote to me.
I corrected grammatical errors thinking that you'd find the corrections to be fun as I had found them as well. I remember there was a girl that you kept bringing up.
And how even the thought of you flirting with her annoyed me. You bought up texting her instead of me multiple times. And even told me how she offered to be yours.
Thanks to that, I knew that I couldn't handle this relationship. I suck at showing my emotions well and that definitely didn't help with me trying to show that I liked you.
It all started off as something just for fun but then you said you were serious about me and I didn't know how else to respond. And somewhere along the time we spent talking, I became interested as well.
A bit too interested, I'd say. And I honestly regret it so much. Before I met you, I didn't know that people can feel as dumb as I did for getting involved with you.
Not you as a person but as an e relationship. I know that I never wanna try that again. You've taught me a lot.
Not only about relationships but also about emotions that I hate with an absolute fiery. Not only the bad emotions but the good ones too.
Since I know that I'll be missing all those good emotions that I felt thanks to you the most. I'd like to thank you for all that you've put me through.
I'd have never learnt what I have if it wasn't for the experiences you've provided me. I still have feelings for you but it'd be impossible not to.
To have loved you so much and to forget so easily is actually impossible. I think I'll always have at least this small amount of feelings toward you.
I always wanted to be your friend instead of your lover. It's thanks to your personality and how cheerful of a person you are. Please continue being as you've always been.