Learning to Heal
Learning to Heal bullying stories

jennycameron Community member
Autoplay OFF   •   4 years ago
The steps to healing

Learning to Heal

There are a lot of steps to healing

Whether you were hurt from abuse, bullying, or whatever else the case may be. Healing takes time, and it's a difficult task to take on.

The first step is admitting you were hurt

This was the hardest step for me, I didn't recognize that what others were doing to me was wrong. But this is the most important step, since you can't begin to heal until you acknowledge it.

Once you acknowledge the hurt and the pain you are in, you can address it, and you can begin to heal - no matter where that hurt and pain is coming from.

The second step is rediscovering yourself

This isn't always a necessary step, but it was for me. I had to rediscover who I was beyond what I was told to be, and beyond the victim status that I felt I could never escape.

Once I separated myself from the cage I was in, I had to reinvent myself. I couldn't turn back time, but I could choose not to let myself remain a prisoner to what others wanted from me.

The third step is mainly emotional

For me this meant a lot of anger, I'm still in the third step to be honest. The third step is dealing with the anger, the depression, and any other emotions you are experiencing.

These can be directed at others or towards yourself. This is the time you're likely to ask yourself "Why me?" or "How could they/he/she/I do this to me?" Questions like this feed your anger.

They feed your emotions. But you need to face these emotions in order to heal. So get mad, cry, throw pillows across your room and hit something. Get it out, and then hopefully let it go.

Step four: moving on

This is a step I'm not sure I'll ever get to, but eventually I will have to let go of the anger and the rage to get on with my life. Moving on from something that hurt you is the hardest part.

You might feel like moving on means excusing those who hurt you, or giving them a free pass. The hardest part of this step is realizing that moving on isn't for them, it's for you.

A part of moving on might be forgiving those that hurt you. What you have to understand is that you do not have to forgive anyone if you don't want to. It is all your choice.

Another part of moving on that's hard is the fact that you might never truly move on. Those feeling of hurt and the memories of what happened will always be there, nothing can take that away.

But moving on is more about freeing yourself. It's about saying "Yes I was hurt, but I can move past that. That hurt does not control me or my life."

Step 5 is seeking help

This step can fall between steps 1and 4, can come later, or not at all. Sharing your story is your choice, just as it's your choice who to share it with. But sometimes we need help to heal.

It's up to you as a person who was hurt to seek help when you need it, be that from friends, a therapist, or someone else you feel you can trust. It helps sometimes to know people care about us.

These people can offer a helping hand, they can listen and offer advice, or they can just be there to hold you when you break down. If you feel you need help, get it. There is no shame in it.

There are a lot of steps to healing

But if you work at it, eventually you will be okay.

Thanks for stopping by!

Stories We Think You'll Love 💕

Get The App

App Store