I fell in love at an usual age to a boy who I believed was the one. He didn't even try to make me feel any differently but he never showed any signs he felt the same
My world revolves around him and my thoughts started to become words with him. He said he didn't see me that way. I silently suffered as I smiled for 8 years of our friendship.
My days spent between that day and today were filled with hope that he would finally choose me. Our friendship was deep, we talked about everything and nothing. Then it happened.
She came out of nowhere, knocking me off my feet and sweeping him off his. I sit and watch as their relationship grew into something I couldn't compete with. I knew I had lost.
She was everything I wasn't. She was everything he wanted me to be that I couldn't reach. Pale skin, blue eyes. My curly black hair and dull brown eyes didn't come close.
I sat and thought what if they make it? What if they vow to each other in a beautiful ceremony with a country music band playing at the reception? We both know he hates country music.
But what she likes, he now likes. He drunkenly texted me trying to break me, to find out if I still loved him. God I do. I wanted to say it but couldn't. I just couldn't. I never responded.
I sat and thought about if I had. It would mean nothing. His fear of hurting girls feeling by leaving them seemed brave to him but hurting mine meant nothing.
I knew I had reached the end with him. I love him, I will always love him. We never were romantically involved, never even kissed but it feels like a blade through the heart.
Their pictures are enough to make me realize as I lay in bed at night it's time to let go. My beautiful soulmate is with a girl who loves him just as much as I do and I know it.
The day I sit at their wedding and they finally kiss, I will clap with rest of them and realize my sacrifice of love will come back to me greater than ever and will be rewarded. He will be fine.
I will be fine.