Grabbing the London tube became habitual. I worked on Regent Street, so I would walk down the road and grab the Piccadilly line at Piccadilly Circus Station after five in the evenings.
Even though I moved here only a few months ago, I honestly felt settled. That day, although, was one I will never forget.
I was drained from mental exhaustion and my crossbody bag was heavier than usual - straining my left shoulder.
It was a bit crowded in the underground but the usual spot that I stood at was still vacant - it always was.
When the train came, I patiently waited for the commuters to come off the train before I leaped in, hoping to find a comfortable seat in that boiling train. Fortunately, I did.
Luckily for me, the seat in front of me was empty, so that allowed for enough room to stretch my pulsating legs. Within seconds, 'MIND THE GAP' came from the speakers and we were off.
A few minutes went by and I was jerked slightly by the halting train. 'MIND THE GAP' deafened me once more and the train became a bit more crowded after Knightsbridge Station.
From the right of me, I could hear someone saying 'excuse me' softly to the poorly dressed European man listening to loud techno music with his large Superdry duffle bag blocking the walkway.
Without looking up, I slid my legs back to my seat. I saw as her small white laced vans stood in front of me as she calmly sat down.
I looked up with intentional nonchalance to notice a woman so beautiful that a burning sensation immediately crept its way from my stomach up to my throat.
She wore a yellow Lacoste polo dress and in her lap was a white Hermes handbag. She sat idly in her seat, observing the commuters.
I couldn't stop observing how perfect her baby blonde hair was in its tight bun and her sweet-smelling perfume.
I was probably half her age but something about her captivated me. She had to have known how attractive she was.
You don't wear such a bold color like yellow and not know that you are stunning, it's just not feasible.
The duration of my train ride consisted of me trying to ensure that she did not meet my gaze but also of me trying not to fantasize about her even more. I knew what station hers would be. I was almost certain of it. I knew women like her.
As we stopped at Barons Court, we both got up simultaneously and I let her pass me first.
As we tapped our Oyster cards to get out of the station, I watched as she took a left and I made my right. I thanked God that I could finally breathe.
I still wonder to this day if I was afraid that she would reject me if I made a pass at her or that she would be interested and would dangerously enter my world.
I guess I'll never know.