o b l i v i o n

o b l i v i o n  writing stories

ioanamoldovan2 chaotic mind / raging soul
Autoplay OFF   •   3 months ago
We all have that moment when all we wanna do is hide in our little corner, far away from the real world. Hide what we actually feel, hide our fears, sorrows ... behind a mask.

By: Ioana Moldovan

o b l i v i o n

by Ioana Moldovan

I was still in that strange state of oblivion. I couldn't do anything about it, so I decided to just let it be. I felt comfortable, yet disturbed by the depersonalization I was experiencing.

Feeling so disconnected, feeling like a stranger in my own body. Breathing just to keep myself in balance, moving just to keep myself away from my empty-self.

All the little details disappeared. And there I was, alone - having to face my inner demons.

They were unexpectedly quiet, my demons, usually, they scream, scratch and bite underneath my skin; afterwards they crawl until they reach my innermost thoughts.

I knew I had to face them first in order to face you.

* * *

I struggled to open that beverage can because I felt like all of our memories were stuck in it - a simple can, resembling a tremendous box hidden in the depths of my heart.

That box though, it's the same for everyone, but filled with different undisclosed feelings - resentment, hatred, bewilderment, despair, fear, remorse, dismay, anxiety, grief and so on.

We all have it,

We all have it, that little box,

We all have it, that little box, where we hide our demons.

When I finally opened the can, I could envision all the memories bursting into darkness, much the same as ravens raging in the night.

I felt like time has stopped for a while and those few seconds felt infinite. It was that moment when I realized what I had to do:

raise the curtain,

get out of the shell,

take the mask off,

peel off my skin

up till I reach the passkey to my inner self.

It feels outrageous how a little box can produce so much damage to someone. I don't think I remember the person I was before this little box brought itself into my existence.

But one cannot change something that has its roots already deeply grounded.

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