by George Flesch
Guy is on a date with Girl, at Taco Bell. They are ordering food when the whole football team comes in, they order a bunch of food, they eat it, make a huge mess, and then leave.
The guy gets their bill. The overall bill for the mess the football team made, and the food is $70,000, plus a lifetime ban from taco bell. This is what really pissed Guy off, he loved Taco Bell.
Guy is driving on the highway, when his car starts to sputter out, "Come on you P.O.S." Guy screams "Work for once in your goddamn life.
" Guy pulls off of the highway onto a side road, and into a 711 parking lot. He gets out of the car, and makes a phone call, 30 seconds later, his car explodes.
"NO, not my twinkies!!!" he screams as he cries "SNIFFLE. My, my twinkies. My twinkies were in that car." The overall damage to the car and to the 711 is $134,000. Plus a new package of twinkies.
Guy works for a construction company, his job is to demolish a house with a wrecking ball. Guy starts to demolish the house, he is in the wrecking ball, vibing to "The Gummy Bear Song"
"I'M A GUMMY BEAR, OH IM YUMMY FUNNY LOOKING GUMMY BEAR, YA!!!" He screams in sync to the song.
"What the actual f*ck!?" his boss screams "What do you think you are doing?"
"Whaddya mean, boss?" Guy asks, genuinely confused. "I'm demolishing this house, just like you told me to"
"Not that house!" The boss screams, "The one next to it." He points to the correct house.
"Oh, sorry about that boss," Guy says.
The cost for the house is $800,000.
Works for the same construction company as Guy 3. The Boss comes over to him in a very sour mood.
Boss screams "What in God's name do you think you're freaking doing?"
Guy 4 who was jumping bulldozers over hills, said "Oh, shoot, I didn't think you were supposed to be back until 3!"
"It doesn't matter what time i was supposed to be back at!" Boss screams.
But right at this minute Guy 4 is in the air and he lands, with a loud SPLASH right into the pool.
"What the Frick dude?!" Boss screams.
The cost to fix the pool and bulldozer is $261,831 plus a new job along with Guy 3.