In my apartment, I have a ghost and a poltergeist, named Diane and Hilda, who are my otherworldly flatmates. On Mondays, we steal the apples from the grouchy farmer.
On Tuesdays, we scare the smart-looking people in suits. On Thursday mornings we send floating flowers to the garbage men to make them smile. On Saturdays, we watch old 'Carry On' films.
And on Sunday we levitate the local telephone boxes and throw them in the ocean saying, 'who needs those'?