curiouser and curiouser
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erenah
erenahthe consolation of verbosity
Autoplay OFF  •  a year ago

curiouser and curiouser

by erenah

because of how I grew up, as an adult, I have GAD

what's interesting is how this does and doesn't

limit me:

happy to explore

the wild , move to unfamiliar cities, take sports to their extremes

yet I'll have panic attacks over the most banal things;

have to control my reactions to anyone touching me

especially when they try to do so affectionately..

even though violence and breaking up fights doesn't

faze me at all,

the way home invasions scare me less

than answering phone calls (though they're still frickin scary)

mine a bravery that only exists

in those circumstances where it's relatively needless; because, in the extremes, it's okay to be afraid

unless instead I consider myself brave

in those everyday instances when I most want to run away -

the ones that scare me literally witless

that I have to get through, anyway..

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