I ask forgiveness
Because I believe I cannot meet
With your expectations anymore.
I'm sorry to let you know
That all this while you have been
Appreciating a non existing personality.
You would be deeply hurt to have seen
The real me never showed up.
Constantly lying and faking
Just for your recognition and consideration.
I wished you would have looked at me a little more.
You cared for me enough,
From my needs as a helpless toddler
To a baby in your eyes even of age 20.
But I wouldn't be wrong if I blamed you
For my twisted personality.
I wished you would appreciate my picture I drew as a toddler.
I wished I could burn that phone of yours, that had a greater value in your life.
In the end I craved for your approval of my talents, which now have no meaning to you.
Dear Elder Sister,
You were right, the way you looked down at me.
True you believed I sucked at everything I did.
From daily life chores to subjects that seemed complicated.
I still won't forget how you underestimated me with every step I took.
You knew I was fake, but you thought that was me.
It will hurt to let you know, my admiration for you has turned into hatred.
Crushing and throwing me to the same start which took me long to reach high. .
Dimming the passion I had to move forward and achieve what I wish for.
Dear Younger Sister,
Daddy appreciated me
But little did he know it wasn't the real me.
He praised and asked you to take me as a role model.
It wasn't your first time hearing about me.
You knew most of the billion colors of me.
And now you despise me to an incurable level.
Cussing sometimes verbally, always at heart.
You comforted me in harsh times.
But deep down I knew, you couldn't stand my sight
Now you say I am nothing but self obsessed
But I won't deny I rather am self conscious.
You are still too young to corrupt
An innocent blooming flower
But I'm afraid your light may vanish soon
You may develop feelings harmful to your own soul than any.
And then you may also want to eradicate me .
I won't blame you, but I want to warn you .
You matter to me, so never reflect me.
You are dear to me, so never replicate me.
Forget my existence if it meant to save you.