One Twenty Two Pm:
From six forty seven am to six forty seven pm I exist.
Maybe it's fair to say I still exist when I am asleep, but I don't really have a concept of what that existence would be like, nor do I have any proof that I do exist outside of my conscious hours.
Although lately I question whether I do in fact exist in those hours, and that's why i'm writing today.
My name is Dana Lucas, I am seventeen years old and I am the middle child of a family that almost certainly exists whenever they feel like it.
I'm in my last year of high school and my girlfriend just recently broke up with me.
I don't like talking about these things like it's who I am, I didn't choose to be seventeen with two parents and I certainly did not choose to be Dana Lucas, but that's how I am defined regardless.
I'll be writing everyday between six forty seven and six forty seven, chronicling my existence, you don't have to read anything if you don't want to,
but believing someone is out there and having them think I exist too might help me.
Today I saw her again. I saw her sweet hair like a bundle of thorns on a rose bush. Her same pretty, crooked smile like someone alone on seesaw.
When her blue eyes look into mine we make an ocean between us. All I want to do is cross it and hold her.
I think getting over a relationship is like thinking outside the box when you're inside a box made of them, you either learn to hate it inside the box and throw it aside. Or you carve windows into the box and live inside.
I'm not sure there is a stronger choice out of those two, I don't think I know I can hate her but I can't stand having her be there without having her with me.