As always, once I finish all the work I have to do, I need some time to recharge.
Its as if a fire in me that kept me going throughout got slowly drenched in water.
But lately it is becoming harder and harder for me to keep that fire burning.
I felt fed up all the time, sick of everything and everyone, but at the same time alone and lost.
The once glorious bright fire turned to an insignificant spark that barely lit up, but eager to grow back up with any sort of success or compliment.
The little spark left was one seeking approval and friendship, but I couldn't tolerate that, I had to hide it from everyone else.
I've managed to keep it to myself for a while now, but it looks worse than ever. A constant flicker showing its determination to stay alive but also its inability to do so.
As painful as may be, I have to try and save it, because without it I will be just a husk of my former self, a decrepit pretender.
But I noticed that, as I let it run free, nothing reignited it as before, everything falling just short of its past glory...
Until, one day, I've met a fire that matched mine, with the power of a thousand suns, but somehow gentle and reassuring, strong and elegant yet wild and beautiful.
From barely a spark I rose from the ashes just to be able to revel in the light of my saviours flame.