"...the sad thing is, suicide doesn't end the pain.
It just passes it on to someone else" I say slowly sitting down on the messy bed, the bed I haven't made in months, crying I slowly look up the one friend that still cares, Jessica,
I see she has tears in her eyes, and I choke out the whisper "this quote, this wretched quote, is the only reason I'm still alive.
" Just as I finish these words, she sees what I've done, she sees that I'm bleeding.
13 months earlier "Down the street, not across the road, dumba$&" A kid sneers at me from the other side of the hall.
Just keep walking, he won't follow you, they never do, they don't know you, don't let them hurt you.
I begin to cry heavier, "I'm sorry, I... I... I just can't keep doing this, I'm sorry, I'm passing on the sadness, I just can't handle it, I'm sorry.
I'm so- Cassie?" I watch with sad eyes my daughter slowly open the door.
"Cassie please, I love you, please go wait in the living room?" my daughter slowly walks over, "Mommy, why are you crying, I love you mommy, mommy don't be sad, I love you mommy"
13 months earlier...
I cry as I run down the hall, pushing people as I go, getting more and more comments as I go. God, why can't they leave alone.
"Who's doing you baby girl, you can't be anything other than a junior, hmmmm, just the way I like em! Still in their primes!" Another guy jeers as I run past.
Jessica stares at my daughter, as she dials the police, "Cassie honey, please go wait in the other room" "mommy is hurt.
Mommy has boo-boos, she needs a kiss to be all better!" My daughter, my sweet innocent daughter, exclaims.
Cassie reaches over to my head, and kisses my forehead, "all better! I love you mommy!" She says then then runs to the door "mommy, tom and Jerry is on, let's go watch!
" She hurriedly says closing the door behind her as if she doesn't want to miss any of her favourite show, a show with a cat and a mouse.
I barely register Jessica tell the police where I live and beg them to hurry.
12 months prior...
I'm holding a beautiful child, my child. Something so pure, so pure it shouldn't be on this planet. I look around, in a room that shouldn't have been where my beautiful daughter was born.
I see the poles that reach from the ceiling the floor, the beer bottles that litter the floor, the wads of money that lay crumpled on the floor, but more importantly I see Jessica,
Jessica the girl that helped me just give birth to my beautiful Cassie. "Jessica-
"Take good care of her, please."
"Take care of her."