From the moment that baby came into my life I knew. I knew I wanted him to have the world and everything in it.
Because that's what he was to me.
I knew I wanted him to see everything good in the world at least once.
The second I met him, I promised myself
I promised that I would give him anything he asked for.
I would pay for all his birthday parties, and toys
Education, and clothes Anything he wanted
And if he wanted something that his parents said no to? We would get it together. I would get two million jobs to pay for any toy or camp or hobby he wanted to do.
I knew I wanted him to realize that as much bad there is in this world, there is just as much good.
I wanted him to be able to look at someone who told him that he wouldn't be able, to look them in the eye and tell them “watch me”, and not only do it but excel.
I wanted him to know that he could do anything in this world if he wanted it bad enough, and yes, I know the saying.
You have to crawl before you can walk and walk before you run, but I wanted to be the one to show him how to stand.
To show him that when you stand up, the world is going to try and push you back down again. And sometimes, it will.
Because the journey from point A to point B is not a straight line. It's got curves and mountains and back roads that lead to U-Turns.
I don't want him to give up because something was hard, I want him to say,
Yes, this is hard, but I am not alone. I can do this
I want him to know that he will never have to be alone in the battle that we call life, and when you push and life pushes back, it's okay to fall because I will catch you.
And I will never, ever, stop loving you
But there are somethings I never want you to know, or go through.
I never want you to break a bone, or get bullied because both really hurt.
I never want you to be sick or give up because both make you terribly tired.
I never want you to be a bully or hate yourself the way your cousin did.
I don't want you to have to wait 13 years for the spark of light in a dark room like I did. A spark, that was you. I never want you to feel the anger without true reason of discrimination.
The only time I ever want to see you cry is if you get hurt playing a game.
And I always want to see you smile. But above all things, I want you to know, that you are loved.