They called it a lot of things
The slums
The hood
Or the more tasteful, "wrong side of the tracks"
When I first started volunteering there, it was because I needed volunteer hours for my resume
If I was going to get into a top school, I needed to prove how good of a person I was
So I signed up
And showed up to my first day completely unprepared
It was a soup kitchen
Which probably should have clued me into the fact that I shouldn't be wearing heels and silk
But I didn't know that then
I stood out like a sore thumb
Trying my best not to spill on my new skirt
With wide, terrified eyes
Everyone there seemed so different than the people I knew
And there weren't nearly enough volunteers
But then there was you
Your face, so delicate even with a cap pulled low over your eyes
The careful way you moved your hands
I could tell right away you were an artist
You were so enchanting I almost didn't notice you slipping extras into your pockets
But when I looked up to confront you on it
The iciness in your eyes shut me up
I'd never felt hatred like that before
The next weeks, I slowly learned
How to dress for practicality, not to be seen
How to talk to these people who seemed so different from me
But really weren't
How to measure out hot ladles of soup without spilling
But I still couldn't manage to catch your eye without feeling a hot shiver of embarrassment down my spine
I didn't know why
I was being generous with my time
We were both working there, doing the same things
But under your gaze I felt wholly lacking
And self conscious in the new work boots I'd just bought
Eventually we exchanged a few words
Nothing much of interest
Just general work related stuff
Until December
When you came in without a coat
I was freezing, even in my thick sweater and jacket
And there you were, the same t-shirt as always
I asked one of the other women working with me if there was somewhere you could go for clothes
She shook her head pityingly at me
And told me you'd never take it
I don't know what came over me that night
But you left about the same time I did
So I just called out
"Hey"
You turned slowly, and I immediately regretted it
"What do you want?" You demanded
I tried to smile at you, but probably ended up clenching my teeth instead
"I just wanted to know if you know if there's somewhere around here I could drop off donations. You know, like clothes?"
"Salvation Army on fifth." You spat out, turning away again
"Sorry, I meant like- like somewhere that doesn't charge people. Like- for people who really need it." I felt so lost, the words just kept stuttering out of me
Your eyes softened a little bit, just enough for my heart to skip a beat
"Yeah, I know somewhere. They won't let you in though." You said, eyes flicking over my ensemble
I felt stupid for forgetting to change out of my new sweater before arriving
"Oh. Thanks anyway."
I turned to walk away
But you called after me
"Wait!"
I turned back around
"Bring them next week. I'll see what I can do"
You flinched at my huge smile
But I didn't care
I finally felt like I was making progress
The next shift I worked crawled by
You weren't there
And I felt all too keenly aware of the giant bags of gently used clothing filling up my car that would go to waste if you didn't show
But right before I left you slid in the door, face flushed from the cold
You caught my eye and jerked your head toward the doors
I nodded and turned to follow
Before promptly tripping over my own feet
Half your mouth quirked up in a smile then
The first one I'd seen from you
And it was breathtaking
You helped me carry bag after bag from my car to the back of your bike
Strapping them down carefully
Right as you turned to go, I tentatively placed a hand on your arm
"Wait, one more thing" I practically whispered
I pressed a jacket into your arms
Black leather, with a thick, warm lining
I'd spent all weekend shopping for something perfect
I could imagine how well the tailored fit would flatter your slim body
And how warm it would keep you
"Take this one, please. For you."
You eyed it skeptically
"This was yours?"
I lied
"My sister's. She outgrew it before she even wore it. Please, take it."
I could see the indecision in your eyes as you debated the risks of charity against the warmth of a jacket
But finally you shrugged it on
I pressed my lips together to keep from beaming
But you just hopped on your bike and road away
A few weeks later was the soup kitchen's Christmas meal
The dining area was packed beyond capacity with families
And the air buzzed with carols
A sweet little girl came up to me, dark pigtails bouncing, and asked me to sit with them
She looked so excited that I finally agreed, before looking up at the table she was pointing at and meeting your eyes
I glanced down at the girl, ready to change my mind
But you gave me a soft half smile
So I followed
I slid into the seat next to you right as the post-meal prayer began
And as I bowed my head I noticed the jacket I'd given you hanging off your chair
Throughout the next half hour of singing, the little girl introduced herself as Cara
Your little sister
I could see it in her eyes
Bright blue and clear
Just like yours
And the way you watched her
Like you were ready to lay down your life for her
I also noticed the socks she was wearing
A pair with pink unicorns that had been mine
Without even thinking, I pulled a pair of puppy gloves from my pockets
I liked to wear them when driving because they were so warm
But I pressed them into Cara's hands, murmuring "Merry Christmas"
She squealed and hugged me
And to my surprise, you didn't look mad at me
That night, as we were packing up
You pushed something into my hands
I didn't have time to say anything before you disappeared
But I opened the card
And saw a beautiful portrait of me
Done in what looked like watercolor
Wearing an adorable Christmas sweater
With your scribbled signature under it
That was the best gift I got that year
Even better than the tickets to Mexico from my parents
After that Christmas, you slowly started to talk to me
Eventually, we automatically moved to the same stations, the work fitting in effortlessly with our conversations
I asked about Cara, how she was doing in school
Once, you mentioned her backpack strap had broken
I knew I could help
But didn't know how to say it
So the next week when a brand new dolphin backpack was accidentally left in the lost and found
I made sure it caught your eye
And it was gone the next week
A few months later came the event that my mother had warned me about
I got a flat tire in the soup kitchen parking lot
It was late, already dark
And AAA said it would be an hour or so until they could get out to me
You walked out to see me crying on the ground
And surprising even yourself, I think, you put your hand on my arm
You offered me a ride somewhere, and I tearfully accepted
I was even more shocked when you gave me your helmet and helped me onto the back of your bike
I wrapped my arms tentatively around your waist
And in that moment I felt like I was flying
You got me home safely, and I cautiously invited you in
You were about to refuse, but I explained that my parents were out and I had pizza
So you came in
I was instantly embarrassed of the decor
So "tasteful" and "elegant"
But really stiff and uncomfortable and overpriced
But you politely ignored it
We sat on my bed eating pizza
And I made you laugh
And in that moment I realized that you were the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen
So I did something really, really stupid
I kissed you
I knew I shouldn't have the moment I touched you and you froze
I immediately apologized, but it was too late
You ran from the room, leaving me frozen there in shock at what I'd done
I cried myself to sleep that night
The next few weeks you didn't show at the kitchen
And I tried to forget the way your eyes sparkled and your body moved so effortlessly
I handed in my two weeks notice
My last night at the kitchen, I was just finishing sweeping the floors when you came in
I froze, trying to hide behind the broom
But you saw me
And the pain in your eyes hurt me more than anything ever could
I breathed out your name, and you glided toward me as if you weren't in control of your body
"I'm sorry" you whispered, tucking your hair behind your ear
"Me too" I replied
We gazed at each other for a long moment, tension in the air
"You know it would never work, you and me." You said "There's no connection."
"It could" I argued
You shook your head and smiled at me
"No, it couldn't. We're too different"
"Prove it." I breathed
You took a sharp breath in then, pulling in to yourself
"I'll believe you if you can tell me you don't feel anything after this" I stated boldly, not quite believing what I was doing
I grabbed your hands, pulling you close to me, and pressed my lips to yours
You kissed me back almost instantly, hands winding into my hair
I gasped and moved in closer, pushing you up against the wall
And you responded with a breathy moan that almost killed me
When we finally pulled apart, we were both breathing hard
"Nothing?" I asked
"Nope" you breathed
So I kissed you again
And again
And again
Eventually we had to leave
But not without a promise to keep trying to make whatever this was work
And it did
We made it though long distance, when I left for college
And you losing your best friend to drugs
And even telling my mom I was in love with a girl from the wrong side of the tracks
And our new home is truly a home
With comfortable, warm furniture
And your art on the walls
And a room for your sister, so she can be in a better school district
And you
Laughing, and kissing, and loving me
That's better than anything money can buy
And every weekend we go volunteer in your old neighborhood
Holding hands
On the exact right side of the tracks
Find more stories like this one bysigning up!