I Held You

I held you your first minutes on this Earth

When you were still red and screaming and wrinkly

As most newborns are

I held your hands as you took your first steps

Cheering you the whole time

I held you close when you cried over a hurt finger

And I gave it lots of kisses to help it feel better

I held you in my arms and carried you into the Kindergarten classroom on the very first day

You were so brave you didn't even cry

Even if you did sniffle a little

I held your hand as we crossed the road on your third grade field trip

And you rolled your eyes and hissed "Mom!" at me

But I couldn't help wanted to keep you safe a little longer

I held the door open for you to leave the house for your very first middle school dance

And didn't even say anything about the crimped hair you'd worked so hard on,

But that I, personally, thought looked really stupid

I held you in the hospital while your father took his last breath

And we cried together

I held onto you to get through the time after, too

You were my reason to keep getting out of bed

I held your hair back when you came home from the prom puking

And gave my best killer death glare to your date, who had provided the booze

I didn't see him again after that night

I held big boxes full of all your things in the elevator of your new college dorm building

And laboriously unpacked each one to make your room a home

I held you when you came back for Thanksgiving and your high school boyfriend promptly dumped you

And I let you cry into my shirt and eat as much ice cream as you wanted

Ice cream heals a broken heart, you know

I held your hands and jumped up and down with you when you came home a few years later with a diamond ring on your finger

And I gave your husband-to-be my best death glare when I told him not to hurt you

He stuck around, though

I held your arm as I walked you down the aisle on your wedding day

And yes, I cried the whole time

But only because I love you so much and I'm so proud of the beautiful woman you became

I held your daughter, in her first few hours on Earth

She looked just like you when you were a baby

I'm afraid I don't have much strength for holding anymore

My hands are getting weaker everyday

But I hope I made up for it with all the times I did over the years

And now you're all grown up, and strong

And I know you'll be holding my hand as I pass to the other side

I wish I could be able to hold you and comfort you when it happens

But you have a wonderful husband and a beautiful daughter who can do that now

So I guess it's time to let go