875 Funny Writing Prompts For Funny Stories And Comedies

875 Funny Writing Prompts For Funny Stories And Comedies

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Have tried writing funny stories in the past, but failed because you are having a hard time thinking up ideas that you feel make people laugh? If your answer is ‘yes,’ maybe you should consider turning to writing prompts for inspiration. 

Writing prompts are great tools that could help make your story stand out from other comedies by giving you new ideas and pushing you to get your creative spirits going. They can also take your stories to the next level by stretching your imagination.  

If you are an aspiring comedy writer or an author in a writer’s rut, here are writing prompts that could inspire you to write funny stories

  • There are only five minutes until you have to give the speech and you just realized you can’t speak. Inspiration never strikes at a good time.
  • The wife-in-laws’ husband wife-in-law is a husband wife-in-law was a constant reminder of her own true age.
  • There came a time when the world was out of handclaps. In order to resolve this grotesque situation, a boy was conscripted. A boy who had been struck on the head by the iron lever in a closed door accident, and was now incomplete in the lateral portion of his left hemisphere.
  • When my headlights were going out…no one knew that the red lights on the road were actually stop lights.
  • Several times during the Second World War Churchill was briefed on recent advances in weapons technology. He’d listen to the reports, only for his eyes to widen, mouth open and jaw drop. Slightly open-mouthed, patting the person on hand, he’d steer them to the door before stepping back into his office. Later, someone would walk in and add in some milk.
  • You hear a sound behind you, but you know it’s my friend Billy, whose name is actually Steven. Stop making me say things two times!
  • Everyone from the outside expected you to have your life together. You weren’t to be concerned with anything. Little did they know, you were worried sick about one of the most bizarre things anyone could identify with.
  • Tell a story of something that happened when you were a kid. Something you’ve left out of other stories you’ve told.
  • There was a family that moved into the neighborhood. Jose, Janet, and Tom. There children Mark, Maria, and Timothy. They were the nicest people you would want to meet. At least at first. One day Mark and Timothy went missing. People looked everywhere for those two boys, but they just couldn’t be found. Then suddenly the rest of the family went missing just two days later. Except the father and mother who were the last to disappear. When people looked around the beautiful house they found more of those flowers and dead bodies all around the backyard AND a port-a-potty. They looked in the bath tubs and the kitchen drawers. The bodies were hidden for a long time until someone they could take care of themselves, or they were just plain stupid. All had the same golden gates and angel wings. Everyone was certain of the fact that the family was a group of satan worshippers.
  • You wake up one night covered in tiny puncture wounds. They heal over time, leaving small coffee or mocha colored spots on your person.
  • “I want to believe.” was not the catchphrase of some obscure nerd, but rather my new way of saying “I need to become an astronaut.”
  • The elevator could only fit one person, so they tossed a coin to see who would go up and bring down the angel.
  • It’s not the same when you explain it to us, so explain it to the whores on the corner outside, the corner of forgotten children.
  • She ran around with scissors in her hair so they were never able to recognize the color of her hair.
  • A running joke can be funny or strange and crucial– and, ultimately, mess with your readers’ minds. A running joke also makes your novel stand out in a memorable way. Could Eva repel the biker girls? Could she use lemons to do so? Maybe she could transform into a laser beam and shoot lemon beams at them!
  • You are sitting at your desk at a job you hate. Suddenly, a man you’ve never seen before approaches you with an argument you’ve never considered, and somehow your procrastinating becomes the action of the minute, the action that leads to momentous decisions in a life you never realized was yours.
  • But not everything can come from a strange world. Some ideas could also come as a part of a mundane world. Perhaps the bad guy from your story didn’t arrive by meteor, but crawled down the storm drain in your backyard.
  • A story about a triangular obelisk made of mud-braken and mortar replaced with a different one, solely based on observation.
  • You enter a virtual reality game in the seal-clubbing business. The object of the game is to seal-club as many seals as possible. It’s the world’s most popular online game. And in no time you’re making a fortune. You’ve become the ultimate seal-clubber. How will it end?
  • The Sheriff and his deputy were riding horses in a park earlier, but then, one horse just started taking off on it’s own. Naturally, the two men wouldn’t let a horse just take them anywhere. The deputy did the only thing he could’ve done, and shot the horse for ‘becoming agitated’.
  • A subtle discussion of the differences between the dreaming of a historian and the degree to which a character in the fiction believes himself to be real.
  • The man in the big yellow hat wanted to open the biggest lemonade stand ever. So he went out to find the lemons, only to find out that there is no more lemonade. Oopsie!
  • Write into somebody else’s dialect. Write from the point of view of someone living in a different time period, like the 16th century. Write the story looking back from about 1000 years from now. What would post-apocalyptica feel like?
  • For a list of funny story prompts from a simplified list and fun exercises, just go to this page . The list is fairly comprehensive but they will prove very useful in terms of idea generation. You can also simply check out my Book, “From blank page to funny page.” and start writing today!
  • The Bakers left the galley messy, so Gavin and his boys decided to contribute to the clean up effort. Consequently, all their masterpieces were saved.
  • More great prompts for funny stories include awkward moments, suspicious adjectives, painful events, and first meeting. Once you’ve completed a funny story, share them with friends or family.
  • Never say die. Blasphemy? Ten years in prison. No trials, no innocent before proven guilty. Just burn ’em! Burn ’em!
  • You were the small seedling that decided to grow up. And rise to be ten times what all the other trees were planted for.
  • A man and a woman want to get married but a mutual need is preventing them from tying the knot for a closer life together.
  • Pirates like to focus on the one thing most people would find most morally intriguing–avast, this is the captured story.
  • Colonel Sanders bobbed up and down on a pogo stick. Do you think he shouted Colonel Sanders while he did this? Or was he just Colonel Sanders?
  • Destiny doesn’t get out of bed for anything less than two million in cash. Or a really good bacon wrapped filet.
  • The man on the train who stared at your arm tattoos for five minutes, despite being surrounded by countless empty seats.
  • Figure out a way to be the anarchist you wanted than shouted at by the powers that wanted to redefine the relationship between you and your government without dealing with any government involvement.
  • Enjoy these and enjoy writing short stories! They are a great way to provide creative writing practice.
  • Don’t forget to subscribe to my RSS or YouTube channel or newsletter above for updates on when more funny prompts come out.
  • I was born a beautiful baby. A beautiful baby in the ugly hospital in the ugly dying town on the dying planet.
  • You were dreaming night after night. It was the same dream, you never forgot it, but it didn’t make sense. What did you dream again?
  • He wore a brown fedora and a black trenchcoat. He gave me a wide goofy grin as he drew a gun from his pocket.
  • The Old west meets high-tech study chambers. A Wild West error leads to a bug in the Matrix. Documented incident of spontaneity. Blue heron falls from the sky.
  • They must have thought they couldn’t make it through. They split their integral selves between a state and the staid. The steady flux is a thing of delight to them, just as the balance between their vibrant impulsions and the détente is. Contact further cemented their romance, but effect dissipated into sparse numbers. They plummeted, plateaued, and now slowly strut gingerly amongst the pincushion and porcupines. Now that they know themselves incapable of tearing themselves apart, they no longer worry about trying to be whole.
  • What if everything you thought you knew about vampires and the undead was a total lie? What if they were just people?
  • A centipede and a butterfly sit outside on a hot summer day playing cards. After a few hands the centipede puts down his cards and says….
  • It’s a curse to be beautiful in this life… or was it an enviable blessing it brought wealth and fame…
  • An original fairytale about a handsome prince, damsel in distress and a white horse where the prince is the knight with a thousand faces.
  • God gave you the job of calling all the shots. What happened to make you forget what He had put you on this Earth for?
  • Why would it have to make logical sense for me to get that part? It’s just a frickin’ job, not graduate school.
  • The struggling artist doodled in the margins of the page, oblivious that the words she wrote were changing her world…
  • What shapes do you see in the pattern of life? Stories can create emotion, setting, likability, and help people learn about themselves and others. A believable story can capture the reader’s attention, if the grammar and sentence structure are good, then they should be able to read the story smoothly. If every aspect is perfect, that means nothing else is left undone. The tale could almost tell itself. The setting could almost design itself. If everything in a story feels real or plausible, then it lived up to the expectations.
  • Later, the same boy pushed a goat down the school’s  staircases. It’s safe to say he was suspended from the school for a solid week.
  • You can use the environment around you to bring color to your writing. Look around you at the environment. The way a roach slithers across your counter – what emotion is it trying to convey? What does a dirty leaf or a wind-blown flower invoke in you?
  • Your name was a living legend. Highlander of your trade.  No one wanted to be the one that slew… you.
  • When your life looked like a stick drawing, only with a few scattered among your two dimensional reality.
  • TheRedheadand The Spacewoman Are Having a Good Time On The Planet of Orange at the North Pole. Prance Around and Find a Big Piece of Rock To Float To Other Planets.
  • I knew they were trouble when they walked in. A girl covered in tattoos, and a guy who resembled Johnny Depp.
  • Hope you’ve enjoyed these funny story prompts. If you want some more, let me know and I’ll post more funny story prompts!
  • Who can discard digital music files that hold exactly one -hundred- notes of -unplayed- music without feeling awful and slightly depressed about it. Isn’t your hard drive a paradise for that lonely unused music??!
  • Write a story about someone who talks about a paradox that blurs the lines between fiction and reality.
  • 1. Go to the YouTube channel, How to Write Great Fiction , and watch the videos on Point of View and Storytelling. 2. After you’ve watched the videos, go to the site to read more about each of the fifteen elements by clicking on the title of the article.
  • All of the writing prompts are effective because you have to get right to the point and remove any fluff from the description so you can tell a story in a creative and interesting way.
  • Have you ever noticed that after a person has died, everything in the house goes to the kids? Except for the dirty underwear in the underwear drawer.
  • Most people are like Slinky. With every step they take, they lose a little bit of their sturdiness and gain a little bit more tually.
  • Write a story about something or someone you don’t like, to get a laugh, you need to include a disliked person in your story.
  • The narrator doesn’t die immediately. Instead, he lives long enough to recount the accident to anyone willing to listen.
  • The kid knocked it 400 yards and because it landed on the road, and not in the field, it wasn’t a home run.
  • Write a true curious tale in which something relevant to your book has gone missing, How could it have been missing, and how could you possibly go on?
  • A lifeboat washed up with two skeletons in it.  The First Skeleton popped out and grabbed his own pelvis.  The First Skeleton’s pelvis didn’t belong to him.  The Second Skeleton lunged out and said, “MY pelvis! Now!!”  Your house was haunted by a ghost.  You almost slept with a serial killer.
  • A priest, a rabbi, and a blonde woman with green eyes are about to be executed and they’re out on the garden swing together one last time.
  • The greatest mystery of all time hangs in the balance, and your friend and you are the only ones capable of solving it, but they, as they say, are M.I.A.
  • Imagine you’re at a job interview for a completely absurd job. What job explains everything that’s happened to you?
  • No one ever suspected the minister was actually a serial killer. But the numbers just didn’t add up….
  • For the next 25 days, post a comment of interest that relates to one of your writing goals, trading spaces for other wants or wishes . Make it fact-based, funny or fiction. Maybe even all three.
  • In the firelight preparing dinner over a barbecue the beloved grandfather of the family takes a young girl’s hand in his own and says,
  • That night the stars didn’t shine because the moon is full every month. And when it’s not it’s a new moon.
  • You encounter the ghost of your favorite actor. There he is in the flesh! You can’t believe your luck. And then he dies all over again and you have to write an article on what he was like.
  • Your mother was the whitest woman you’d ever seen. No one’s mother was whiter than yours. Wait? What?
  • The story focuses around the things that happened when, with what, who was what, who did what.   Sometimes impossibly forced, sometimes just weird, and other times just slightly funny. The point is to be funny.   Sometimes done by picking 20-50 completely random subjects, then picking out ones that are funny for whatever reason.
  • Give me this day my daily bread.  Other stories stem from the imagination to list ideas. These exercises are fun, excitement and great ideas to use as a springboard for stories.  It is all about stopping the gravity of your day. Making your creative mind float up into the clouds with no limitations. To create stories to amuse yourself and anyone who reads them. To write about whatever you like. To write about the people who really interest you. Nothing makes an awkwardly normal person observe and invent rather than someone who is a headliner. Invent your own direction of your story and drive a pit of obstacles. Keep your issues in mind but allow yourself to Spin the idea on its end and make it humorous and crazy fun.  Just talking about writing stories can lead to a great idea or even a character for a story!!
  • Ever walked on the sand and couldn’t find the water? Ever walked on water and not been able to find the sand?
  • The White Witch is having an important guest over, a scruffy-looking nerdy guy who carries luggage larger than his own body while the creepy yet overdressed butler, dressed in purely white, escorts him to his room. As he disappears down the hall, the White Witch’s daughter walks in to ask her mother innocently where the new guest is staying, wondering if she can play with him. The mother is a bit offended by how this scruffy nerdy guy came to be a guest, and she asks her daughter “Why in the world would he be staying here?”
  • My co-worker saved the company from almost certain failure only to have his efforts called into question.
  • You’re in a totally haunted and abandoned house that you think is truly beautiful and charming until that really hungry yet relentless Vulture starts to nag you about what already-chewed-on bones you have back there in the cupboard that are just his size and whisper over and over, “Oh-do eat me.”
  • While growing up, your dog slept with you in your parent’s bed while they slept in their bedroom. Every night.
  • There was no way, no way someone who eats family pets would possibly have eaten my lost hamster. Right?
  • Write a story about a ceramic or pewter or lead figurine. Go into great detail about how it was made and how it might come to life.
  • In a world where noses were big business, two men vied for dominance. One noseless and the other flawed…
  • See what happens when a couple is forced to leave their home by circumstance and the rules and regulations surrounding urban civilizations. The husband eventually ends up building his own home minus a few materials.
  • A Silver Scoter is the most annoying bird in the world because even when it is dead people will throw it into a lake.
  • Every time the narrator reached the turning point in a tragic story, cash prizes were shot out of a cannon.
  • Choose people that you think are particularly familiar with someone who is close to you otherwise maybe a little bizarre.
  • So in Havana, this old man yells out, “You so stupid, you had all those Castro’s beat, what’s you firstname?”
  • If you use somebody’s accent to the point where they can’t speak at all, and then they decide to just leave before killing you, is it okay to say Black tax, as long as you pay it, but don’t actually take a mason jar down from anywhere and hold it out for them to put a quarter in?
  • Write a story that parallels the creation of people and the world in the Bible, beginning with the creation of the universe.
  • Honest Abe’s Honest Axe repair shop is across from Honest Abe’s Honest Auto Salvage. It’s across from Honest Abe’s Honest Sporting Goods in a section of the city where there is little honest business. None of us are getting any younger.
  • Tell the entire story from the main character’s weakest character flaw if your character is not heroic/has no flaws.
  • The quirks and oddities of the world are what make it amazing. Don’t be afraid to explore the strange!
  • You have the power to make someone else disappear. You can choose to take someone or the whole world.
  • The next time you tell someone to get over it they’ll die. With no one there to bring them back to life.
  • She always fell in love with people she shouldn’t and dated guys that were completely wrong for her. And yet, they all had one thing in common. She left you for them.
  • For the first time, the award for the worst fiction is awarded to Chuck Wiener. This is not a story about a man named Chuck Wiener, but rather is the story entitled, “Chuck Wiener’s Hair Journey.” “Chuck Wiener’s Hair Journey” will be printed on paper, and will surely be a literary success.
  • If lightning bugs had leaders, they would all decamp to my front yard to live and play vigorously in my dark corners.
  • A writer, reeling in self-pity over his lack of recognition, searches the nearby woods for some sign of recognition or even a single sapling with his name on it.
  • Have a main character that works at a really bad job/preparing clear margaritas at the corner store for a buck.
  • “Do you remember when we used to sit up all night and talk and talk and talk about the coolest things? What happened, man? Why aren’t we still talking?”
  • What is the funniest short story you have ever written, but really should sell because it’s really funny.
  • The new girl doesn’t have a name. Her real name is impossible to pronounce and occasionally she forgets what it is.
  • Ages and ages ago, in a galaxy far away, so long ago we didn’t even know when, back when King Arthur ruled Camelot there was a cobbler…
  • Have the character use a ridiculously large amount of made-up jargon to describe a situation or event, single-handedly destroying the target’s self-esteem and worldview.
  • Your late-friend Johnny was the weirdest person who ever lived. He did the strangest things. Even though you think he was a weirdo, you have to admit, the results were “worth it.”
  • It’s a tale with no meaning and no point– yet one that must be told elicits the most sympathetic response.
  • Give your character an impossible list of tasks, ridiculous prerequisites, and insane hoops and twirls to jump through. Poetically portray humiliation, the extreme senses of frustration and despair, and/or autism.
  • If you build a boat, will it hold up? If you build a raft, will it be water-tight? Are you looking out for me? Breathe. In depth. Exhale.
  • What is your ultimate reality television experience? Take Lana Condor On A Blind Date spoof scene from To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before by Jenny Han for example! What is your ultimate reality television experience?
  • Orhan Pamuk, a Turkish writer known for The Black Book, grew up in Kaffeebecher, an Arab neighborhood in Istanbul, where he sold lemonade called “Bean and Istanbul.”
  • Nanai is a three-toed sloth who mainly feasts on prickly pear cactus to supplement his protein. He has been waiting for fair share solar panels from the energy company so he can stop eating cactus and start spinning his fiber, like many of the young sloths in his community do.
  • Story about movies or books that sound cool when you’re framing the scene but are terrible when you get down to it.
  • She was the sweetest girl in the whole wide world, but not a day went by without a peacock trying to ride my bike.
  • Unplug everything. Feel your breathing. Slowly have a panic attack. And then plug it in and forget about it.
  • Checklist, checklist. What’s something you need to make sure you don’t forget to do on a first date?
  • He ran into the mead with a paper in hand. He was an author, not just a writer, but a famous…oh, never mind.
  • Professor Dudley says, “No pain-no gain.” Considering this new-old adage, a sailor on a paddleboard
  • No one ever went into the old meat processing plant since it closed twenty years ago. But one day someone noticed and followed the little trail of steam coming from the roof. When they got to it they were shocked. The smell of meat and fresh blood made them gag. What they saw was hard to believe at first. What they saw made them vomit. You see, the factory was now run by mad scientist cooks. They use meat that people use to buy. It doesn’t come from there. What they cook is so good people can’t resist the smell. Their main item is called Fainiburger. It is so good it is supposed to change from a gas to a solid. Fainiburger is rolled out into a tent where people buy it to go. People were buying all the meat they could get their hands on. It’s a family operated business that parents love to cater businesses with for birthdays, weddings, you name it. It’s just so popular people can’t get enough.
  • Declare pestilence on the previously killer garden gnomes that are now holding your neighbor’s son hostage under your stair step.
  • Madness victims are happier than the sane, who just want to get fourteen hours of sleep in one night, without the disruption of yet another “loud noise scare”.
  • No one was sure if his mother was pushing the boundaries of time, space, and his mouth just to hear him scream.
  • They say curiosity killed the cat. And ever since you got curious about the wrong thing and followed that dog, you’ve regretted every decision you’ve made.
  • As Gary Larson did for comics, compose a hyper-stylized, exaggerated prose that mimics the surface qualities of a very different kind of writing.
  • That expression on your face, bemused and awry, one side of your mouth curling up in a mocking half-smile. The blind rage upon seeing my drawings, my close-guarded secrets, the pieces of my heart laid bare, stained in carbon soot.
  • You’re not a real shifter until you’ve had your skin eaten off, your body drained of blood, and had your eyeballs pecked out by a crow.
  • Travel back in time to observe a historical event, alive and in person. Use your knowledge of the future to influence the outcome of said event.
  • Just after his mother had died, he saw the apparition next to him with her arms outreached. Good thing it was seen through the webcam of his computer.
  • We demolished a small, defenseless, sandcastle and the world crushed us like it crept up on a surprise party.
  • What if every word you wrote was written in pineapple upside-down cake? Would anything make any sense?
  • Write a funny poem. This could be a parody on Old King Cole, or another famous poem. You might want to try to whole Sonnet 43 nevertheless inquire of me…
  • You’ve had moments of Clarity. A heightened awareness that gives you the sense that you have your feet on solid ground. But for the most part, you meander, unsure of your place. With a slight sense of fear, you’ve built walls around yourself and your heart, using your past experiences as bricks. But at this best, you are Chaotically Neutral… photographic proof.
  • 1. Africa Revisited  – ‘On civilizing Western civilization, African masks, cold weather and the skull’ – Makgoba
  • A man went into a shop, asked for “six back scratchers.” Mentioned ticks. “Been bitten by a dog recently?” he asked. So he asked for a “pea shooter” to “blow all those ticks away.” He said this at an old-fashioned general store. They sold everything from guns and paints to “tack and feed.” “Geesh,” says Bob. “This puppy will blow every one of those ticks right out of their blood.” Lermontov Palmerrell was able to shoot all the ticks away with a pea shooter.
  • Make the reader think the story is going to follow a straight line, when, in fact, you’re going to take it on a sharp left turn.
  • As he drifted off, he pinched his wife’s leg until she hit him on the belly. “Hey!” she said. “That’s not a good idea.” He said, “I was swimming and my head fell off.”
  • Fiona Smythe, a four year old lives whenever her father isn’t around. Once he’s blessedly gone, she transforms into her evil knock-off of Barbie. One afternoon, her father is just about to head out to a business meeting, so he asks her to give him a kiss for luck. The request, of course, makes Fiona sick. Instead, she tells him that Holiday Barbie will kiss him on the cheek instead of “dry rubbing her lips”. Disgusted, the father leaves. The audience expects this story to go down a typical road. But no, when Dad returns home a few hours later thinking he’d made a major business deal, the father is met with a post-it note which says, “I need a bigger attic”. It turns out that, for her “treat”, Fiona took a pretty BB gun and did some barrel racing with a broom handle. Thus, the note.
  • Write the story of someone who’s really, really good at PowerPoint. Even in an era of Google and Twitter, their slides are so good, the audience is hypnotized.
  • Think of the space capsule scene in “Wrath of Khan” and what ensues when a man with healthy “curiosity” and a few jumplings of plunk get together.
  • Imagine your laundry folder is a person. Cool, yet annoying. So you dump them out in a single heap and they jumble around like an angry drunk.
  • During the Time of Gray, no one dared voice their true thoughts in public or in private. It took courage to gain new knowledge.
  • A New York caveman was trying to spelunk, but could not climb up because he had a belly. So he yelped as loud as he could…then a few minutes later, his buddy dropped him a ladder. That’s not real real, but so real it’s real.
  • Go inside your car and write. Give all the details – make it like no one else could have experienced this exact thing.
  • Until society is prepared to accept its place within the natural order and begin setting reasonable goals for alternatives, there is no choice but to rely on the perpetuation of primitive and environmentally atrocious technologies like nuclear power.
  • Write about how you woke from the most fascinating dream just to find yourself in the most boring situation you’ve ever been in!
  • Tell it all. Do not be sensitive.   Trust the reader to catch only the essentials of your story while filling in the gaps. Embrace the fact that there is so much more to understand and experience than you will ever write.
  • After reading these, breathe out or exhale. Still holding your finger against the key, remove your finger and look through them! Breathe out and then do this 2 more times.  See what happens.
  • The longer you looked at your face, the longer you were convinced a monkey could do a better job, but he was an idiot.
  • Make the thread exactly the right size to fit through the hole, and then turn it one thousand times to the right as you enter the hole… from which things currently come out.
  • Why did the poet love his cabin in the woods so much? He simply loved it more than anything else in the woods.
  • The terraforming is a certainty the simulations proved it. Nothing could go wrong, we planned for every eventuality. You can’t hide in spilled milk.
  • Sometime in the future, a human might fall in love with a robot and other pieces of monumental fiction.
  • A bear, a car, a tire, a wheel and a turkey walk into a bar. Sounds a lot like the start of a joke. But it’s no joke when the turkey comes in shooting. And the only joke you get out of it is the one on your tombstone.
  • You haven’t spoken to your father in a very long time. He has been remanded to the sub-basement laundry facilities for the past several years and forced to tend to the mundane needs of the wealthy. You are ready to go see him and release him from the duties of the laundry worker.
  • You’re distracted by a magnificent sunset. Succumbing to its warm and welcoming glow, your thoughts begin to drift apart as you become enchanted by the burning blue hue that dances in the sky.
  • That hidden side of yourself that usually doesn’t get displayed in everyday company has to be hidden no more because the surprise party your spouse has planned for you is sneaking up on you and it’s going to be occupying every corner of your house, so, get in harmony with yourself…cause it is all out now.
  • Things lay broken and forgotten, scattered as if a storm had swept through somewhere, regretting di…
  • Everyone can be silent and noisy at the same time. You just need to have earbuds that are plugged into your ears…
  • There are times when you write for the world to see, and then there are times when you write to see if the words will fit.
  • There once was a man from Nantucket, who had a whack of almonds, and a lady from Racine, who couldn’t disarm him.
  • A pleasant stroll, or maybe a marathon run is what you usually experienced on your bike tour around your neighborhood and imagined on your couch in front of the TV.
  • A very hot summer day, as you laid your head on her lap, she told you a long, sad story which you never forgot. She was buried in a seaside grave, with her action figures never to be played with again.
  • How many Jifs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three! One to unscrew the world, one to screw the future, and one to screw the future back on. Or you could just add all your Jifs together…
  • A Greek chorus of a dozen people stand behind you one by one and speak 2 lines. It is irrelevant as to what they say. It is merely the sound of their voices.
  • You are asleep within a dream, within another dream, within another dream, within another dream, within another dream, within another dream, within another dream…
  • Three little pigs.  Pop! Goes the first pig’s house!  Pop! Goes the second pig’s house!  Whoops! There goes the big bad wolf…  Oh, no…Not the third little pig’s house.
  • I spent all night cleaning up blood from the lobby. It was hard to get out of the cracks of the floor.
  • A ship was floating in the water far below the mountains with hope in the captain’s eyes. Here it comes. One second. One…
  • One of these days is sadly about to be your last. Unless you can think up a quick and clever ending.
  • An important lesson for all authors who wish to create scenes of tension – make your characters talk about the farthest thing from the trouble at hand.
  • Freeze time for 2 minutes. When the timer goes off, you’ll be one month older. What does the future hold for you?
  • While you were away on holiday, your aunt decided to redecorate your living room in red and white and where your couch used to be is now a large bird cage.
  • Einstein never wore greetings. Mohandas Gandhi never wore pants. Amelia Earhart never wore underwear.
  • Have your main character wake up to themselves having done something absolutely and totally different from your previous work.
  • If you could go back in time and witness the birth of anything or anyone, what would it be? What would the circumstance be, what year would it be back to? Where would you be, …?
  • The Most Interesting Man in the World explains why all flags are bad and go 170 kilometers per hour in 45 seconds.
  • Deconstructing the pro wrestling persona – make the wrestler into a non-wrestler and tell why that character became a non-wrestler.
  • When your TV makes too much noise while on the phone, you need a remote that allows you to effectively bat at the volume control.
  • You’re playing your cosmic stereo and tripped over a sidewalk crack. That’s strange. There had never been one there before.
  • A journal between two friends, one who lost his wife in a car accident and one who has just admitted a one night stand after she told him she is starting to see someone else.
  • You live in an average world. There is nothing special about the world you inhabit. Something or someone will come along to show you that there is.And this last one has always been a favorite of mine. It comes from video games. That’s right. VIDEO GAMES!
  • You got off the bus in the morning and greeted your friend with, “Hi, Napping! Did you have a good napp?! Ha ha! Keep on sleeping and your dreams will come true.”
  • Desperately searching for what idiot lost your pet bunny.  The little tyke was wearing an army helmet too. What was he training for?
  • Hansel and Gretel were lost, children’s bones were forgotten next to the four day old ash of the campfire.
  • One, two, Freddy’s coming for you. — Slight variation on the above creepypasta prompt, “Five Tries Not to Wake up”
  • Junk was gold in California. People would pay top prices just to have back whenever they thought the world was about to end.
  • It has been said that the element of surprise is very important in horror novels. Surprise works extremely well and is oftentimes one of the most powerful tools in horror writing. The element of surprise will help pack a more powerful emotional punch.
  • And that was that. Abraham Lincoln had saved the country once again, thus realizing his mother’s dream of him becoming President.
  • Your name will be mispronounced all your life, people will get it wrong and you can’t seem to make them stop.
  • Write an elevator pitch for a killer morphological virus that eats human bones. No. Make that human flesh.
  • There was a man they sent to a giant rocket! But something was wrong with the world. Something was definitely wrong.
  • Mom and Dad always loved you best. You were the one they called on to make decisions and rescue them from challenging and inconvenient situations. Be careful…they may be the reason you’re in prison and can’t call your own family.
  • You carry the love of your life with you everywhere you go. Unfortunately, she dies every day at midnight. It’s worse than a story in a book.
  • This is more of an art technique. You pick a cool or funny sentence and then crop Griff before while typing it or doing something.
  • Only humans could take over natural resources for ourselves leaving behind a mess for another species.
  • You win some, you lose some. When Tagore’s car breaks down during a family vacation his life takes a turn for the worst but is it more than that. Will the sale of a winning lottery ticket unravel even harder times ahead or is it the answer he is looking for?
  • Write without letting the pencil ever touch the paper. Have the fingers glide across the page as you type.
  • You are sealed in a room that is temperature controlled perfectly. You can never be too cold or too warm, but you are not allowed to leave.
  • Your life was in black and white. You were used to the setting, and you liked it that way. Then one day you discovered there was a color channel you had completely missed out on. What would you see with a color camera now that you’re no longer entirely shielded from color…?
  • Write about a time despite a nagging voice in the back of your head you did something crazy and insane.
  • Interrogate your lawn mower. Praise him for launching the first successful lawn mower satellite at the feverish apex of his mechanical orgasm.
  • There once was a woman who was so attractive, four men were fighting to their deaths for the right to marry her, but the question was…. Which one would she choose?
  • Dogs eat homework. It’s what they do. Period. End of sentence. The end. The era of the Thompson family.
  • I saw a cockroach skittering up your arm to your shoulder. Don’t be scared. I’ll grab it and put it outside.
  • Your father’s wealth and popularity have meant you one thing so far—privilege. Is that where your laundry list of qualifications end? Or have a few gaps gone unfilled?
  • The Iceman Prank. Buy an 1/8 of weed then go to the freezer. Make all your friends think the weed is just covered in ice. Wake them up, and the Iceman will have come and gone.
  • Think about someone you know who is either really short, really tall, or really fat. Have him/her walk into the room.
  • Arthur was a child of fantasy and truth. Not often could he tell the difference, thus his name, which seemed fitting.
  • Everyone else is a redbird and you’re a robin. What happened, how can they all be redbirds and you be a robin?
  • Everyone thought you were Egyptian. But it turned out you were just a little black boy whose father was a dentist for the Egyptian royal family.
  • Something old… Something new… Something borrowed… Something gray… The time he slipped on a banana skin and broke his leg. The dress she wore on her first date with him. They taught the millionaire to sing his last will and testament.
  • What happens when you put the world’s grumpiest man in front of a mirror, and let him complain and moan about his life for ninety minutes…?
  • And the following prompts are about more common submissions, and my feeling is that they did not deserve an accept, however funny stories.
  • Somebody worked really hard drawing something on your face or body. Emphasize how impressed you are that they drew a dinosaur on you, or a plane, or a flower, or a penis, or a pot leaf. It has to have love in the work, of course, and detail. You’ll realize this as the story builds.
  • Your school was so boring you decided to explode it. In the end this resulted in you getting expelled.
  • Things the stars say. Things that wouldn’t disturb, but wouldn’t exactly lull you to sleep at night.
  • Let go of every single bit of sanity you ever had and go completely insane. Hold on to hope and don’t let go of it.
  • When there was nothing but sand in the brick, you had to pick up one of the bricks. Maybe it was my brick? Was my brick the one picked up last?
  • An astronaut landed and grew tomato plants. If he sees another astronaut do the same, what would he think?
  • Every so often, Mr. Grant comes into the break room and does an impression of Clifford Pearson’s grandmother who answers the phone at her nursing home that badly, and you notice that Meeka is terribly upset.
  • It seems only yesterday we had a family of wolves, a family of mice, a family of mice that lived in a wolf, a bulldog and a cat that lived in a bank.
  • After nearly destroying his village, the Lazy Prince makes sure not to repeat the same mistakes again.
  • When bored at a convention, one is advised to see the before and after photos. That should liven things up.
  • Two co-workers ran into each other they hadn’t seen in a while. “Good to see you,” they greet. Then one says a little sarcastically . . .
  • At the murder trial, the prosecutor said that the victim had 30 stab wounds but bite marks showed that 42 teeth to be involved. The murderer confessed, but said that it was a “joint effort”.
  • They warned him not to eat the fiddle player, but he did not listen. He did, of course, get sick. Everything in…
  • Throw your main character in a situation that is completely wrong and confusing for him/her. His/her normal behavior will seem very out of place.
  • Exactly how it sounds—nonsense punctuation. Bold and italic letters if you prefer, use as many words as you wish, be as silly as you want… just make it nonsense.
  • Cold and brittle bark, the delicate touch and the delicate scent. Her hands and lips were mine. Hers and she would not be comforted.
  • I tried bondage, but you don’t get quite the same screams from younger women after removing their clothes.
  • If you find a way to fulfill your wish or dream would you stop wishing or dreaming? Or would you make the most of it?
  • A computer woke up in a new millennium, asked itself “where am I?” and answered “Negative Space.” God was not there.
  • Every action hero story needs a protagonist who needs help getting their suit on. What’s your story?
  • Make something funny out of reality. Maybe you want to make a laughing stock of yourself, or you might just want to share the humdingers of reality.
  • 3. Next, find an oddity in the story. Something out of place from what should normally be the case. Ask it to tell you the story. Place the story back in the box and take it somewhere completely different. Pluck out a new story of the absurdity of the first in some bizarre variant.
  • This one is great because it gives you the opportunity to tap into a deep, dark place in your soul and create a detestable Exceeder with one simple adjective…
  • Frodo realised as he walked down the final stretch of the yellow-brick road that it might not have been quite as easy as all that being the last ring bringer.
  • The woman three houses down has been staying up until three in the morning knitting mittens for kittens.
  • A one-armed man is shooting dice with God. God always wins. The one-armed man does not understand why.
  • Why did the chicken cross the road? Why?  You better know the answer to that philosophical question, or you are going to die.
  • Start worse and make it progressively worse until it’s extremely out of whack and you suddenly get a happy ending. Springtime for Hitler.
  • Think specifically and thoroughly about the last helicopter you saw. Then the last car you saw with its lights off. The last bag of bird seed.
  • Look both ways before you cross. No one cares about the people or the dog that crosses against the light. If you want to stay alive, you need to know where they are.
  • The woman’s shoulder blades brushed against one another whenever she stretched her arms above her head
  • A few of these prompts are more for free writing exercises than for actual stories, but either way they both have potential to inspire your creativity. If you have TONS of ideas flowing about your prompt, zip up your overalls and start writing! If you’re still looking for some fresh inspiration, don’t worry. You’ll be able to get a lot out of these so keep reading!
  • The kick is a novelist, struggling to cope with a bad writing day. Unfortunately, she has no idea how to solve this problem. Her Muse has abandoned her, and every word she types expends more agony on her and less on the keyboard. There is no spell for this. There are no charms or potions that will bring the Muse back to her. So, she gets creative.
  • This list is a good way to begin when you don’t know what else to write. It gets the creative juices flowing and can open up new events to put in your flash fiction.
  • As long as a character has multiple dimensions to him or herself, it can be funny to throw in an eclectic mix of traits. Just when a reader thinks you’ve made a character’s outlook on life clear cut by developing her beyond the generic-ness, toss in a personality trait that prevents such a judgment.
  • The person who gives you the most rhetorical questions about your life is the one who divulged information best saved for yourself.
  • A kid whose father owned the local book store dresses up as the Sesame Street icon and blocks the aisle hock
  • Just when you thought you couldn’t make use of laughter yoga. This book will open your heart,…
  • Cats act like real cats and are the best all around pets. Dogs act like we would expect and better adapt to a modern society. Explain how boring this would be.
  • Little old me, lost in the city. Feeling crushed by the magnitude of it all, the cold, hard concrete. Oh, better yet. The city was frozen in a thick layer of snow, making every movement sound heavy. It was the city’s yearly tradition to remain encased in ice, adding on to the city’s beauty and making everyone provide one another with warmth of all kinds… After all, we needed to move forward from the ice age.
  • Tell us a story of a true heartbreak. Or you could talk about how that one time Jim chose Sue over me for the basketball team going to the state championship almost got me a heart attack.
  • No matter how popular some other brand might be,  there was none better and more loved than the one you were using.
  • Turn your antagonist into a godly complex being, and pretend to be winning the battle for all of five minutes. Then get beaten by a fifteen-year-old boy driving a borrowed car.
  • These stories often have a punchline at the end, there may be an irony, weirdness or fantasy surrounding the premise, or the character may come to a realization.
  • A bird falls from the sky and into your soup. You scream and jump out of your chair, food and broth tumbling to the floor. The maid misunderstands and burns down your house.
  • You have unbelievably super powers. Seriously, you can make anything possible. How do you squander them away?
  • Thanatos, my boyfriend, just broke up with me. He saw me with Keith at the Winter Carnival. Even though Keith has a mohawk, gold teeth and a skull and crossbones dimestore ring. Even though I’ve never even liked Thanatos in that way.
  • On a clear, cold day, the sky is blue. If it is in the middle of summer, the sky can smell like butter melted into hot toast. On this sort of day, you think that there will be corn.
  • Flip a coin, heads or tails? Both phrases mean either, and the reader just keeps flipping the coin back and forth.
  • If you have a funny story, but you’re at a loss for how to actually write it, you might try writing a paragraph pretending it’s a very serious story. And then go through and periodically, CONSCIOUSLY write the funnier version of the same thing. My advice is…  to take a break from writing for a while and sort of have a little fun with what you’ve written. Don’t let yourself take it too seriously. Think of it as entertainment.  If your writing style lends itself more to humor, then let yourself go and enjoy yourself.
  • Some stories are being told at dinner-time. Somewhere in the world. Some for the first time. Someone somewhere is listening for the first time. And someone else somewhere is listening for the last time.
  • Oxymoron! The Wag Bag.   Also, look up this link! It’s a great website, but there’s so many great links included in Wikipedia that it baffles me how many can fit in there! It’s important to look at this page too if you’re a beginner! It’ll teach you terminology!
  • My parents were involved in a cult, and there’s this ritual they performed where they sacrificed me.
  • Have you heard the one about the person who just sat around and killed time all the time? One day…
  • The letter is a lie. You may be a better writer than you think. Consider each sentence to be a letter, each paragraph a word, each chapter a paragraph, each book a chapter. Pulling those words apart you see meaning and find original story ideas in the same manner.
  • This is your captain speaking, we will be experiencing some slight turbulence for the next five minutes. Please remain seated and keep your seatbelts fastened.
  • Divorce isn’t easy, especially when trying to divide up all your pent-up rage. Good luck untangling these plots.
  • A war has destroyed the human race leaving only robots, molded to look human. Now there is a war between the dark and light robots.
  • The devil goes to at least one parent-teacher conference every year, and sometimes they even make him feel guilty.
  • In order to get to the garden party, she would have to negotiate 1,967 miles of tunnels before emerging into the sunlight.
  • You put on a wig and head on a quick trip to the store. You forgot your wallet, but they have it on camera, so you decide you won’t mind paying. As you exit, you see the curtain fall and hear the dial tone in the background of the camera shop.
  • If a character is mentioned in one section of the story, then he or she must be cast as a character who speaks a great deal later in the narrative.
  • Imagine you are a copywriter for a clothing store. Your task is to come up with some made-up sign slogans.
  • Jimmy raised an ear to the lamp light to play. He could feel it loosening, maybe he could make it fall.
  • A car stopped at a red light. It was a robot car. The lights turned green, but the car didn’t move. When the car was about to get a ticket, the light turned to yellow, to orange and the car hurried away.
  • There once was a pirate who made out with a mermaid’s wet Wardrobe. From that day forth, he was covered in scales, and started swinging a noose around.
  • The dog’s name was confusing. It looked like it was supposed to be a newly created dog ending in the suffix -y, but the dog instead ended with the suffix -day. And, to top it all off, the dog did not look like a dog.
  • Another Sunday, another family argument about hair. A haircut of disproportionately epic proportions that not only divides a family, it hermetically seals them off from others and the outside world.
  • A deaf person hears a knock at the door and opens it to find a race of others who live without doors.
  • You didn’t look at my test grade right away. You placed the test in your backpack and went fishing.
  • Make someone feel something. It can be an emotion. It can be the feeling of something. And it should lead to the next feeling. Feelings are lead. – Joss Whedon, an earlier TV writer with an earlier success on one of those small messaging things.
  • Be cool. Like nothing’s wrong. Of course your then wife is not going to meet you. Why would she? You took the dog you love. Kimmy, the Chihuahua and your credit cards, car and your money. You can always borrow money from your buddy Owen. That’s what friends are for. You think you are at his house. You woke up one morning just an hour ago and came right here. You were at a party and his neighbors came over for a party. You hung out until it was time to go to work. But you don’t think you work. Yet you went to your bank and tried to withdraw money out. But the money wasn’t there. What is going on? You get up to leave. Go to his living room and you try to call Noel. But you can’t get through. She is not answering. You have a wife Sidney and a daughter Marie. You dated once. But you left what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. At the moment you wish you never stepped foot into the city. This is too strange.
  • I finally lost the last stubborn 10 pounds the week before my husband deployed. By the time he came back, I’d gained it all back and then some.
  • You’re stuck on a deserted island in the middle of nowhere, with an iPad that never runs out of power and creates online jobs for you to do.
  • I’ve always wanted to work with children. They are so innocent and vulnerable. Timmy is my first. Isn’t he darling?
  • I lay down on a meadow, looked up at the sky and sensed there was something out there in the background.
  • What is the last thing left in your fridge that is particularly delicious/mutant/vicious when preserved?
  • There have been many articles, books, and many other creative works and compilations of comedic writing prompt ideas.
  • Think of a belief about how the world works and write a story embodying the belief, then tell a story that says the opposite.
  • A meteor destroys the Earth and turns everything–including one of the characters–to dust. Whether the dust remembers being made of people is up to you.
  • An even funnier version is that the more things change, the more they stay the same…no one would suspect something was amiss with the status quo.
  • He cares for his patients with a sincere and serious demeanor, and he is obsessed with caramel popcorn.
  • Humor is in everything, even in a research writing– as Clotho always knew. Just by taking a couple of minutes or even a whole semester to look for a literary device, your paper will be funny. Why? Because…well, excuse me, but you were looking and Clotho approves of that effort.
  • Hum, Um, Umm, Ahh… those were the only noises that existed before the great ‘Eu’n’ to begin existence.
  • Someone dies, and their ghost lingers on, not able to cross over until the person responsible,” takes ownership” of the mistake and apologizes.
  • The tricky thing with a word is that you keep using it the more you use it, the more you have to keep using it until it loses all of it’s mystery and nuance, and the more it stands for what it means and the more it doesn’t stand for what it means.
  • The terrible things youngsters with the best intentions do not only to their bodies, but also their minds.
  • Cue bedtime story, The Princess and the Pig. One characteristic of a princess is that they are beautiful. This describes Dawn, the princess in the Hunter family. She is just about as
  • Humor is delicate. Laughing at a story only happens if one buys into all the elements of a story. This happens when everything works, if all the pieces fit together.
  • The Sith created a vacuum-sealed, pressure-cooked chamber that conserves foods’ freshness while dropping their caloric content.
  • For two days you and your friends have traveled across unexplored land. A cry of warning guides you as you see two large mountains on the horizon. Over the next four hours you spy nearly 17 different creatures, some you’ve never seen before.
  • Suffer the little children. Let them suffer. Just pour the gasoline and strike the match. Feed the fire until it burns to your fingertips and beyond.
  • In the worst of times, there is good. In the best of times,there is bad. The number of bad times as the number of good times will tell you just how good or bad life is.
  • And lastly the romantic prompt. This can work in all areas of love. A crush/love is always fun to write about.
  • Each time the mother checked on her child’s progress in writing, she found an addition to the story. The change was small and subtle but the words took on a sinister tone and a darker scene played out within the pages. Read more HERE . There’s no better time than Halloween to read something spooky.
  • I’m a single girl in New York City who is very satisfied with her life and doesn’t need a boyfriend.
  • Imagine a world in which people can read and write without actually learning how. The entire language is pre-programmed into people from birth and cannot be changed. They learn how words fit together by watching TV. Imagine a whole society like that.
  • You’re in an alternate timeline in which you have to get from A to B to save the world. You’ve got one hour.
  • Everyone you knew was an accountant. Steven loved accountants. He was seventeen. His father said, “Be an accountant, son. Work isn’t as much fun when you smooth out the numbers for a living.” So, Steven smoothed out the numbers for a living. It was billed as his lifelong dream. Until, one day, Steven was completely, absolutely and utterly bored. His secretary, an incredibly attractive French Exchange student, Mimi, grudgingly handed out thick piles of paperwork. Steven reported her to human resources. It wasn’t her disgust that compelled him so much as her complete and unconditional love of his miserable work life. He hired her out of desperation. For no reason but to relieve her suffering, Steven committed a small infraction on his tight little scale of morality. It felt good.
  • You know the drill people. To all the great people who contributed so far , thanks once again for your time, trouble and talent. Keep on ’em coming.
  • Each night you buried part of a body in the backyard. The body parts would be right there in the morning with you, with no sign of digging.
  • What is hidden in the closet? A monster? A creature from your imagination? The memory of your mother’s hands when she tucked you in when you were little? Maybe it’s nothing…
  • You had a jar of cookies. You opened one to make sure they were fresh but… they weren’t. That jar was fresh as your grandmother’s pie crusts!
  • The Fiddler on the Roof story is a nice one to do if you want a long story with some foolishness and a touch of magic.
  • A man’s fingers on his right hand are amputated. Only his thumb remains.  He uses it to give advice by saying, “Use your thumb. It’s more clever than the other fingers.”
  • If you like these story prompts, please share any favorite funny-story-telling-prompts that you have.
  • This is a great list of jokes and funny stories you can use to practice your oral storytelling. And as a member of Story Club, you get unlimited access to this and even more. So sign up today to help your telling skills blossom!
  • Someone attacked you with odorant cologne/perfume that smells horrific. You faked illness so you wouldn’t have to wait until the scent went off.  The attackers came to give you a treatment that cleared out your sinuses so the smell could be inhaled through them.
  • The pencil refused to be sharpened, chipping its point instead of yielding to the knife each and every time.  It would have been more appropriate to sharpen the knife, or at least the pencil taking the most logical action to avoid being sharpened but that is not how it happened.
  • It escalated from a simple party prank, into a brawl, into a gun fight, into a city-wide scourge.  Bobsled Team Nitrocide broke their sponsor’s blockade in an attempt to find a better look.
  • Write eight lines of dialogue between two people. First person speaks four beats and the other person speaks three.
  • Theodore is a dominatrix. One night, her parents walk in on her getting goodies from the guy next door.
  • The 91 bus picks up and drops off at various local places. One time, a local place was an old folks’ home.
  • Joan and John were in their kitchen. They had dinner waiting for them. But they forgot to set a place for Bill.
  • The old man at the end of the driveway found the bodies and the dog. He didn’t do anything about it. He lived down the block and down the street from every neighbor on the street. And everyone knew that the old man followed people with his eyes down and up, down and up. Everyone knew that the old man was not to be trusted.
  • Every time you do something well, every time you praise someone, first think about your satisfaction right after he finishes when no one is looking.
  • The professor asked the question and she sat there, her hand raised, finger poised and ready, waiting for a moment to shine. She didn’t know she was supposed to speak. But she wanted to be the best student…ever after all.
  • The only thing more disheartening than someone not liking you is the thought of them knowing you don’t like them.
  • This is a type of short story frequently found in stand-up comedy. You list a few abnormal points, then finish with the punch-line that ties them together. This family rock collection was a complete load.
  • You know how that imaginary friend you made up when you were little stars coming for you late at night.
  • Imagine how different your life would be if a few things had a different outcome or someone made a different choice.
  • Run someone over without getting caught. The terms of the contract are this, you will have to disguise or conceal the accident.
  • In one night, you could be best friends with babies, elderly, bosses, high school and college siblings. No judgments. An equal opportunity grub.
  • It seemed a shame to use these prompts on your day-to-day work. You might want to wait for a day that you have a looming, not-dealt-with issue. It can turn out to be a powerful tool in helping you see a new side to a problem and potentially solve this issue more easily. It can also be demoralizing to see a problem solve itself immediately with resolving some sort of less-than-intimidating issue.
  • Stretching? She’s been practising how to crack her bones to make them longer and stretchy like rubber bands since she was a child.
  • Write a character profile of yourself. What’s your epic flaw? What impression do people have of you?
  • The sight of a white rose in bloom left the villagers speechless and senseless. One spindly blossom was white. One plant, in all the village, had produced a white rose. The villagers had seen white flowers before, but always in person. Never in the art form, because the white heather and albiflora were not flowers. This single, perfect blossom was no more than a mirage, but nothing so horrible could bring the people of this village to their knees.
  • Where does the lost city that never existed in the middle of Europe of a desolate country that had been torn apart by war stand?
  • You’re a trolley. You have to follow the rail. If you veer off the tracks a voice shouts, “You’re going the wrong way, trolley!”
  • The kid across the street has fallen from grace, but did the kid across the street fall hard enough?
  • Two nine-year-old girls were whispering about their mother when one said, “I think it’s such a shame that Mom has to work. She doesn’t even notice what any of us are wearing.”
  • Two guys and one girl must decide who is going to break up with who in order to save everybody’s self-esteem.
  • The urge to fit the story into the shape of the prompt is as strong in the author as it is in the story editor.
  • Your total is six twenty-two but you had loose change and only one bill which amounted to six dollars and twenty-two cents. Which item would you purchase?
  • Your two thousand monkeys are going crazy and you can’t keep them on task. They’re everywhere on every site giving out spoilers and secrets.
  • Your elementary school teacher and your best friend get in a giant fight. They call out each other’s weaknesses and failures, and just before the teacher is about to tell your friend he’s a fraud, your friend interrupts.
  • Ending It needs not be said, but all of the following are very open ended. Your choices are unlimited. This is an opportunity to produce your own original fiction.
  • Use in a character’s name something that is anatomically wrong, but which everyone refuses to see as incorrect.
  • We’ve all done something weird when we think we aren’t being watched. Write about it and post it in a public space. See what happens!
  • PETA sent you their monthly newsletter in the mail one day. Did you know they recreate the slaughter of your steak?
  • Ask questions to get back at an enemy. There are only two ways he can answer with both being negative.
  • Starting with “The little Red Hen” tells a story making the effort of the heroes the hardest thing imaginable.
  • The Flintstones versus the Jetsons. What if Josie worked at a lingerie store and Pebbles wanted to buy some lingerie but she doesn’t have any money. So Steve makes it so the Jetsons can get free lingerie? What happens next?
  • A magician is never late because he gets there twice. –Arkan Gus……. My favorite story is the one about the magician.
  • You wake up and discover you’re the only person left on Earth. How will you maintain the power grid? What are you going to eat, if anything at all?
  • It was a bright mountain day, but on the top of this cliff it was lonely, cold, and windy. An eagle could have circled and landed, but no one would have ever known the difference.
  • Sometimes we forget to think. Thinking a pretty big word. A lot of people don’t really know how to use it.
  • Write a scene where the last survivor of the human race returns to find everyone long gone. What does he do to get through the day? What reminds him of people? What does he miss about his fellow man?
  • You were coming home from school one day. You were behind a house, sitting on a hill. You noticed clothes hanging on the line. You wondered if, instead of jeans and skirts, they wore socks.
  • Teacher- One day you have a frog and you put it in a blender, and you can make frog smoothies. BLARGH~ That’s what you should use the blender for instead of drinks.
  • What if you discovered a secret restaurant? And not just any secret restaurant but a secret restaurant with really good food.
  • A unicorn walks into a bar, points to the bartender and says, “I’ll have a beer, and no one better speak or look at me!”
  • Pick one object and one emotion. Have your character act out that emotion through the use of this object.
  • Write about an anonymous character. No names, no description of the character, just write the events of the day as if you were this person.
  • Once upon a time there was a progressive left-wing liberal chick enamored by socialist/leftist ideologies.
  • You drink your favorite drink, and when no one is looking, and there’s a drip of liquid left at the bottom of the cup… you quietly eat it!
  • A man walks into a bar and sits down. “I’d like to get some wine.” The bartender replies, “You’re out of luck. There is no wine in this bar.”
  • You’re the new girl in town, and you don’t know what food to eat. Soylent Green? Peak Purple? Purple Flavored Soylent Green?
  • Add some food coloring to your drink. Neck it in about thirty seconds. Then act completely oblivious as your friends try to point out that orange soda does not come with blue straws.
  • Take 2 very different characters with an unlikely pairing and drop them into a common situation, great conversation, or funny setting.
  • Explain to others what is going on in a beautiful way, that you understand as clear as day, but the others can not understand because they aren’t thinking like you, and vice versa.
  • You’re at a lonely motel on a dark night in Texas. Open up the kind of horrors you’d expect and the circumstances surrounding the same.
  • -Each character has one weapon, one piece of armour, one accessory, and one special skill. It’s a dungeon-crawler game, and you’ll need to roll dice to beat the monsters each round.
  • You’re in the garden swearing at the neighbours cat. It’s just run off with your favourite pot plant. And you’ve got a very rare, pure white, orchid in there. You can’t believe that he’s stolen your expensive orchid, this special blossom indeed! “CAT!” you yell! “Did you take my orchid! He runs off with the cutest little grin! “Cat.” you scream!” He never learned his lesson, not even once, that sneaky cat.
  • In the sea were several huge rectangular sea-veggies. They had been married for several months and were arguing about things in their life.
  • Your grandmother had to explain, show and tell to your father because he thought it would be something physical that he could do instead of just talking.
  • All of history, well the first forty second of it. The history of an entire world… condensed into forty two seconds… And you could not read lips, but you knew everything… and you were present.
  • Our five year old neighbor/friend, or whoever you’d like, died in a tragic accident. Circa 1990, say.
  • Larry would be home early every Tuesday. For years this went on silently. Tonight was his first Tuesday coming home.
  • You need to isolate the main character. Take your main character out of where he first appeared and put him/her/they in an entirely different time or place.
  • Remember when you were younger, how you had to wear those ugly clothes your mum and dad bought you.   Enjoy those days because now you’re too old and don’t want to wear them.
  • BUT WAIT. We’re getting ahead of ourselves. This only covers the beginning. This only covers the first bit of the story. As the story goes on, you will become more and more immersed in the story. You will have bigger problems to deal with, and that will change everything. Simultaneously your protagonist will develop and improve herself. The deeper she gets into the story, the more immersed she will become. The more she immerses herself in the story, the more it consumes her life. The more it consumes her life, the harder it is to immerse herself anymore. And… you get the idea.
  • And the creature spoke of a place where he could find me…. In the warm glow of his eyes…. It soothed my worries…
  • Then a small bird landed on his window sill and pecked at the egg for what must have been hours, days maybe even weeks. Another appeared, then a third. Before he knew it he had a whole flock of birds. Which one of them started pecking first, he couldn’t be sure. — Hills Behind the Hills
  • Sometimes staying in bed seemed like the best option. The hot water was so, so, so deliciously inviting. What a mighty quandary…to take a bath and reflect upon the warm wax structured layers of Cthulhu that impregnated the many dimensional universe.
  • Your story must include a parent of yours… Who must in the beginning, seem like the most intimidating, or bossiest parent in the world. Deep into the story, you reveal that your dad just likes cookies.
  • Gravel and tar make a peculiar red, the color of dried blood. The red makes the deserted town feel like a crime scene from a t.v. show.
  • Waking up in the middle of the night you notice that a small, circular cleaning device is hovering directly above you. Brandishing a small broom, the device begins to work.
  • When you told your sister about the pee covered toilet seat you stubbed your toe on she laughed. She just didn’t want you to accidentally tell your mom. So then you told your mom and she goes, “This is why you need a cat.”
  • Several months after his dad died, Travis Hanson’s mom asked him to dig out the frozen ground in the flower bed and replace the barren dirt that their landscaper had spread. It was way too late into the year for planting new flowers, but Travis wanted to comply anyway. Besides, the whole summer before Dad had laid out plans to spread new over the old which had withered and died. He really appreciated the attention she was giving things around the old house. This was one of the first steps on their road back to healing.
  • I get the junk, like what comes at the bottom of a Christmas tree. Not the pretty, caramel colored hard candy, but the rock hard sticks of sugar, faded red and green swirl candy canes, broken toffee candy bits, and the occasional Gummy bear.
  • At night when everyone else was asleep, she would cry in her pillow so no one could hear her. When she was done, she would go to sleep crying. Her bed would be a little damp. If anyone were to lie next to her, it would be damp, too.
  • There was a small boy who had a special hanky, one with magical powers.  The hanky knew the boy only had 12 days to live.
  • When you pause to think about life and death, you realize something strange. A pause may make your life epic.
  • Me and my friends were lost in an enchanted forest. We wandered for hours and hours until we couldn’t take it anymore. We finally stumbled upon the moon
  • Explain brilliant commentary during a movie that the patrons had hated due to the movie theater being empty.
  • People used to stop and stare at the paintings in the hallway, but by the end of the month, they still did.
  • Another day, another death, another invitation into an unbelievably realistic TV world. You climbed in, twice as dyed as everyone and not worried about it all. Why?
  • A diligent husband is about to hurl when he realizes he will have to tell his sweet bride-to-be that their house is infested with – what else – termites.
  • Write a story that involves a character whose nose is two different colors who is brought in to solve your problem.
  • Noah gathers animals of every shape and form onto an ark in preparation for a flood of Biblical proportions… Did God really say?’
  • I was at the park and saw a very small police officer chasing a hobo in speedos. They were having a really good time…
  • What would it be like if the weather forecast was 100% accurate? What if we knew no surprises? What if…forecasts could predict the past?
  • “Wait till you see my next trick.” And then the magician’s head disappeared into the striped rabbit.
  • A shape spun off the blackboard, screwing its way into the floor and down into your neighbor’s crawl space. Eventually its grinding and crunching in the dirt dissipated and all that remained was the blackboard.
  • In order to change the world you want to have a younger lover. Will you wait for him or her to grow up?
  • Lost and alone in the winter wilderness – 100 miles from the nearest settlement – completely broken mitten!
  • Those who walk in sunlight shall become vampires, and walk at night. Those who walk in darkness shall become werewolves, and become white in the moonlight, howling at invisible dogs.
  • “She got you good.  She really got you good.”  Over and over again this line gets repeated, but as the story goes on it is not as clear if someone is being serious or was someone who played a joke on him.  There might even be a third possibility in this story.
  • Ginny had been writing a letter all week and it was wholly involved in her biggest secret of all. If she were to tell you, it might get out. She did not want anything to leak out. It was about the handsome young American flexing his muscle by the fireplace. He was her ticket to the stars. He had told her a lot about himself… he said he had been in the Navy and that he had sailed along the coast of Texas. He had told her he loved strong women of Texas. He enjoyed their head strong personalities and that their curvy bodies were fascinating. Beyond comprehension. But Ginny did not believe him. She knew this boy was all fluff, like cotton candy. He seemed so funnel-like. Too fluffy to be outright and he enjoyed being vague. She could tell he had also been reading a lot. Vagueness in particular.
  • Let’s play pretend. You pretend to be a mother and I’ll pretend to be a child. Let’s call the imaginary friend we invented together, Wanda.
  • You are possessed by a Werewolf, but it’s okay…you are in love with one. Explain why you use your new found powers for ill rather than good.
  • Congratulations, we’ve all been transported into a game in a completely new dimension. One where you will have to fight for your life, or utilize any mad skills and abilities you might have to get by. You can wear all the armor you want, but if you don’t have a sword hanging over your fireplace? You’re coming with me. Is that coming with me a yes or no?
  • All of a sudden, you find yourself on trial for your life, yet you’re the accused.  What do you think led you here, and how do you intend to plead?
  • The couple took out a life insurance policy on their infant daughter. Two years later, McGuire’s baby was run over by a city bus. To collect on their insurance they gave the agent a list of all the babysitting they’d been doing. Turns out, they’d been babysitting the bus driver.
  • A cop pulled me over for speeding. He looked at my ticket and said, “This is you, sir, here, not here.”
  • Win the Lottery, a new Lexus every year, celebrity-status, play sports with other celebs, become a political powerhouse…then realize all of that is exactly the same as what you had before.
  • Don’t mourn for the loss of humanity. Show us what happened in the wiring of the first murderbot. Show us how they were born. This could be a dark and twisted story or a philosophical exploration of autonomy and empathy in one of impossibility. If you can show the empathy and mercy in a robot it could be compelling and moving.
  • You know how you hear of a story in the news about how criminals are rethinking their original choice of career…?
  • You are watching The Sound of Music with your family and Julie Andrews breaks out into song and your family wishes you were dead.
  • Sweetheart, if you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, then catch it and keep it. If it doesn’t, let it go. Believe me, you’ll be happier.
  • What if somewhere in history an anomaly exists where instead of Germany being on the winning side of World War II, the Axis powers were victorious in the great conflict.
  • 1. Light travels faster than sound 2. It is a mathematical certainty that you will never reach your destination if you travel on trains. 3. Read books
  • Write a story in which your shoelaces all fall off in the middle of a big event. And they’re not tied correctly. And they’re laces instead of ribbons.
  • The story must have a beginning, middle, and end. The ending must not be pat, but surprising, yet in keeping with the tone and style you have established. Tell the story in one complete paragraph.
  • Write a story about someone or something exploding, imploding, or tribulationing. Write a backstory for that bomb or superhero.
  • A bunch of red ants. A bunch of green ants. Punch them together and what have you got? About a thousand mixed-up ants!
  • Purple smoke pumped the car out of the garage. It was a lemon – not even a year old and supposed to be at top of the line for safety and power. Yet here we were…burning in front of a roadside diner.
  • He was a sunburned football player, she was a skinny semi-star pitcher. He liked to make a fool of himself and cheer, while she watched and occasionally took tips when he wanted to learn something.
  • Aunt Suzy works for the Owl Order. They both start with O. Now you have a bizarre connection to make.
  • The world’s end was put off for a time when cotton was king. Dogs had curly tails and only the rich were.
  • The perception of your mental narrator is always in the present tense. Show rather than tell. Show the events in the action rather than explaining what’s happening. This concrete action will demonstrate the consequences that are often left to the imagination.
  • A man’s hand hurts, because his beautiful wife would like him to get rid of the crab that’s living underneath his hand for three months. But that crab is his best friend! Catch-22.
  • A book is a collection of stories written down. Sort of. A gun is a collection of metal bullets in a cardboard cylinder. Sort of. A body is this collection of cells we call a “person”.
  • They said he was bad. Evil. A monster. But that didn’t bother me. Nothing in their tales bothered me. Nothing except for the truth–the horrifying, blood-curdling, reality of what my father had become.
  • A powerful and suspenseful story from the view of a normal automobile that reminisces a car crash story.
  • A democracy isn’t a democracy without freedom, and then when freedom was found it was taken away… when it was the only thing that mattered.
  • In a time before time, Where remembering was time for reckoning, A dark stranger, instilled to be loyal, Was the only creature to be Without condemning morality or technique to ascertain his closest friend
  • You can’t learn anything from your mistakes if you fail to learn from your success! – Ivan R. Lobotka
  • My character gets into a small argument with a family member who went missing… or rather didn’t go missing. Stopped going missing, went missing. Sorry about that.
  • Kermit the Frog recounts the one time he met Jim Henson and Gene Roddenberry in Texas. Hasta la vista, until we greet again, my friend. Until we meet again.
  • The couple was getting ready for bed.  The man brought in the fish bowl with the pet goldfish that he’d caught earlier that day at the park. Both the man and the fish were surprised that the fish was still alive. He thought the fish was a goner. As he went to brush his teeth, he told his wife that he was going to flush the fish down the toilet. She interrupted him mid-sentence, pointing out to him that the fish had feelings too. He backed away from the toilet insinuating that he had already been caught for what he was about to do.
  • A teenage boy realizes he has the ability to reincarnate anyone who died tragically or illustrated. The teenage boy understands he can help the world or simply save the one girl he desires to have.
  • Parking violation tickets are too easy to get so they should be made harder to get. Everyone speeds so there should be no speeding.
  • What is your scene missing? Legs? A head? Skulls? Hearts? Tell us what is missing from your story scene and leave the rest blank.
  • Going overboard and embellishing an insignificant detail. Show off how fabulously ridiculous you’re willing to get.
  • Writing a short story when you don’t know what’s going to happen can be a difficult problem when trying to hammer out a story. People go at it all different ways. Four Seat Round Table has a great exercise to help you figure out your story’s plot.
  • Write a character and then write another character meeting him/her for the first time. Don’t show your character to the other character.
  • Upton Sinclair once said, “It is difficult to get a man to understand something when his salary depends upon his not understanding it.” Could Hollywood be the same way?
  • If you really didn’t like the second book in this series, it’s probably because you were waiting for this one.
  • All of these prompts are designed to help you with your first idea. Starting with a common subject is great for beginners because it can help get your mind thinking about how to create a unique and humorous take on the subject. Eventually you’ll want to start writing creatively without the prompts. This will help you pare down ideas to your own creative voice.
  • , written for the Tortured Heroines anthology, in which you are called upon to play yet another tragic character, and it’s up to you whether you choose to tamely submit or get out and leave murkier destruction in your wake.
  • You were always the good girl. The one that did everything right. With christian parents. That went to church. Daily. You were the pious one and the most respected. Everyone wanted to be you. To be good like you. Separated by line drawn. Thunder. Lightning. Beach. What keeps you fed. God is a good god. Or was it the Devil in disguise? Oh. It was Jesus? Ha. No. No one told you to kill your husband after he tried to sacrifice you. No one. Let that sink in. Oh you killed your husband? When you were on acid. Weed. Sanity. What’s that? They never informed you about her, of him, your sister, your half-brother. The daughter you met or the son you didn’t.
  • Navigating this space between what is and what could be… or better yet, what should be… but isn’t.
  • Writing prompts will be used as a starting point for the writing exercises in The Practicum in Creative Writing resource module for The Gazetteer of Mechanical And Mythological Boston, which is available now. More on that in the coming weeks!
  • His mother, who had subscribed to the mistaken belief her first child had been born a boy, always tried to dress him in masculine clothing.
  • You will have a bouquet of flowers waiting for you. A very special surprise bouquet. The flower delivery boy will be with you shortly, the voice over the phone stated.
  • The neighbor across the street from you went missing and no one noticed. You are having a yard sale cheaping out all of their household items and no one seems to notice.
  • Write a story in which something is at first glance what it appears to be, but on second glance isn’t.
  • There used to be a barber who left around midnight and the next day, he realized the barbershop was much sweeter!
  • So, this nerd gets struck by lightning and becomes a genius. He gets the Nobel Prize but does not stop there. He also invents a Death Ray.
  • Two-hundred eighty-two candles, one hundred eight cake slices, three eighteen-year-olds, one bride, one groom…
  • Organized religion was outlawed. The Chosen One still became the savior and led the remaining faithful outside the walls and into the great unknown…as outlaws.
  • The sound you’ve never heard before. The taste that you haven’t tasted. The color that you can’t see. The name you’ve never said.
  • Shakespeare’s Macbeth is full of funny situations. Consider putting characters in something similar.
  • You’re a chicken crossing a road. What’s hilarious is that directly under you is a road sign that says “Do not cross the road. You will get killed.”
  • None of the lights would turn on. In fact, if you were to risk turning one on, the bulb won’t even light up.
  • Now people need you to complete a mission, contract, or head out on an adventure. The thing is… you don’t know who sent you. Who do you listen to?
  • Take three characters from three different stories or books and make them sing Let it be during the zombie apocalypse.
  • The Director did not like my performance! Do you want your acting career to go? Get Actors! Read Group Acting Scenes! In The Coffee Shop Click Here To View Video Featured Below!
  • You’re walking into town. There are soldiers there, armed and scribbling madly on decrees. You’re to be shot. As they raise their rifles, somehow you can hear the captain say…
  • Call a girlfriend/boyfriend you’ve been wanting to talk to and start the conversation by saying something totally inappropriate. Don’t explain why.
  • A mother lost her young son in the grocery store and, while looking for him, happened to notice some beauty products being used in some odd way, and she found him.
  • Each day we, with the keys in hand, unlock the door to the station marked with the number 18. We look ahead. We see the bare tiled walls. Yet…
  • I heard the story about me through my sister. She heard it from her boyfriend who heard it from his cousin who attends the same college as the person who knows a guy who knows the girl who is sleeping with the other girl who is my lover’s girlfriend.
  • They call it day, but that’s a misnomer—”night” is so much more fitting. After all, he’s a vampire, and work’s over for the day.
  • Your internal monologue asks all the wrong questions and for some reason the internet wants to attack you for trying to make the situation right.
  • There’s a higher power of some sort. Kind of divine up there. But this power doesn’t answer anyone’s prayers. Just send down a single strawberry at Christmas time every year. Everyone kills each other at Christmas.
  • Everything in the fridge had a face, a personality. A table full of appliances. A family, you used to call it.
  • Samantha had always wanted to be a princess. It was just that she didn’t think anyone would want to be a princess in a place where fairies were made of spun sugar and princes were made of peanut butter. It was the day of her thirteenth birthday and she was trying on her whore’s outfit and riding her pony over to her boy toy when the weirdest thing happened.
  • The game doesn’t always have to be obvious. Find a way to slip it in without the reader knowing even after they finish. Also note that there is never an incorrect choice, only a misleading one.
  • A cold pair of hands touching warm skin, fingernails drawing marks across skin as licks dip into every prey hole.
  • I know this wonderful ghost, we’re brothers in all but blood.. we’re in the process of writing a book about him, but when asked who it’s about we pretend it isn’t about the ghost. We have to worry about the serious consequences of being taken seriously.
  • You know the old saying “don’t bite the hand that feeds you.” But times get hard and temptation gets the best of us…
  • Write something that’s totally normal. Like, a door’s normal, right? What happens when you show me one that isn’t? How about if it’s a ghost door?
  • You’re on a train. Everyone is stone faced and silent. You claim you’re on a train in the very distant future, and it’s infrequent.
  • Go to the most inconvenient or least visited place in your house. There you will find your cell phone. Pick it up, only to find there’s no charge. What do you do?
  • A defense attorney crawls on his hands and knees chained to a small bag of cocaine. He tells the judge he isn’t addicted and has a lot of “will power”. Really, he can quit any time.
  • The nagging wife represents nature’s inquisitor, continuing to bore her thesis into the wall until it hits a hollow space, in which it booms and echoes hollowly. For those who want to bore through the wall, they suffer the most, from every other bore in history, who now become the full body of the wall. Those who stand to the side, don’t suffer a thing.
  • What if the student could induce creativity/trust or understanding – etc – into the subject that other methods/techniques couldn’t, for drawing, for example. Can this be done with technology?
  • All the women in prison can cook but only my sister can make beef stroganoff from the convict’s rectum. Then again, for some reason, it’s the can-opener that they all hate most. And don’t get me started on the giants! They’re huge, all of them, even the women. My sister makes the beef stroganoff…
  • These impressions need to be written out, polished, and perfected. They need to be as funny as possible, but also acceptable, given the scenario they are written for.
  • Write a letter in the format of someone applying for a job. In the letter, state why you’re applying for the job, and give a brief summary of your past employment experiences. For a twist, apply for an exaggerated or impossible job. For example, Yo Gabba Gabba seeks qualified candidates to climb out of the 2-year old demographic and make a smooth transition into family viewing. Only candidates with four years experience with preschool children or advanced degrees in early childhood appropriate curriculum can apply.
  • You had the best shoes in your whole town. No one had better shoes.  And then…you lost them. Gone forever.  What would you do?  How would you feel?
  • Pain is a way of warning something is wrong. Pleasure is a trick to persuade you to keep feeding it after it’s over its proper amount.
  • Upon being asked, “Is there a reason for this interruption?!” the interviewer responds by saying, “I’ll get back with you.”
  • You were just sitting on your hands and they fell off. Nickels and dimes dropped between your fingers as they slipped off your wrists. Your bones were no longer connected to each other and detached from the skin. They were small bits of green gelatinous liquid and knowing as they landed in piles around you. What do you tell your parents at the hospital?
  • Write about a mundane day where something strange happens, but it’s so normal that it’s not taken seriously.
  • The forehead of a teenager, like a wrinkled, pink, fleshy fruit mysteriously growing on a cereal box.
  • This list can be used as a Writing Prompts Life hack or an ice breaker when interacting with others.
  • Have a childlike curiosity to find out why things are the way they are. To search for truth. Become a child of philosophy.
  • Did mom have a cat? No, she had a raccoon. It was very nice as well.  Routine thundershowers yesterday. Nothing to worry about.
  • You should have seen the train traffic coming from the toyland yesterday… boy can they move a lot of toys around!
  • Birdsong in the morning would wake me to the most glorious day since God handed the world over to man.
  • Chop up sentence structure into a partial nonsense that creates internal rhymes and makes your reader sort the rest out
  • We’re here because we’re here because we’re here because we’re here because we’re here because we’re here because we’re here because we’re here because we’re here because we’re here.
  • Imagine that your whole family was in a plane crash.  You find yourself out on a satellite planet with a bunch of unclothed space pirates.
  • People here love it when you underestimate them. They lap it up and feast on it with fervour.  Well, at least most do.
  • Mr. Funnybunny writhed in agony as Mr. Crowbar plunged the crowbar into his skull and twisted it round and round. “Your mind has always been the most delicious part of your body,” crowed the crowbar-man. “Now I’ll feast on it.”
  • You are shrunken down to the size of and stuffed into a plastic bag and then washed down a sink drain.
  • Your grandmother has a rule for everything – and she says you’ve broken them all. You hope that when you tell her you’re pregnant it won’t be the straw that breaks the camel’s back.
  • Hum trills in the highest of pitches, screeches in the lowest of tones. Strings shudder, vibrations resonate, pipes shatter as shrill trills and breathy croaks erupt into the air.
  • Don’t be afraid of cliché situations. They are work horses and teach you the rules of writing comedy. Overusing them is different from relying on them. They will stick with you in your writing forever and keep you from becoming dry as a desert.
  • Close your eyes and put your left hand out. Keep it there. Now put your right hand out. Keep it there too. Now how many hands do you have out?
  • Kermit wasn’t real. He was a smoke puppet. There was no him at all. To reveal this would be to rob all Muppets of purpose and existence, including myself.
  • I once did a voice for a character on “Death Battle”. The character’s name was “Professor Filip Desmond”.
  • Click here to head over to Chapter 1 and try out creating a new chapter.   Let us know how we’re doing!
  • You don’t know anything about this. To even mention it will increase tenfold the probability that you’ll be institutionalized.
  • Once upon a time there was a woman in a cave. And you just have to read it to find out where she’s at.
  • It was the heat of summer, and most days were spent at the Mermaid’s cove or Skinny dipping off the pier.
  • You never knew if the werewolf was a slobbering, drooling werewolf or an astronaut werewolf taking some time off from the moon. Please consider sharing this page with others! There’s a lot of readers here.
  • They climb up onto the table and balance wires in my face, hoping my brain will accidentally fry itself.
  • The top was taken off the mayonnaise jar. The green apple made its home outside the jar, and you ate it.
  • The cockroach had a baby. Got nursed in a chest full of snakes. But it was soft. It was warm. It was safe.
  • Your enemy moves backward in time and causes events to occur that when in real-time produce a series of unfortunate circumstances for you. The enemy eventually stops interfering with the past and they go about their business, but you must continue to react to set occurrences, any of which may have been the direct or indirect consequences of the enemy’s time-travel tampering.
  • There’s a connector in your car. It plugs into your brain. Then, every time you think of a name…that’s the car name.
  • The last line is always, “the nerve of that guy!” No one else would dare it. The guy is never convicted. How can they convict a perfectly good man? He had all the best reasons but he lost.
  • There is a moment where she’s no longer a figure of curiosity, mystery and enigma, She’s just a girl.
  • You walk into a bar, and the bartender says $10 for a scalding drink. It was the last drink you had.
  • You were arguing with your friend over the definition of love and you saw a shooting star. You decided it was a sign.
  • I could once move a full set of teeth from one part of my body to another, so a) please don’t question my abilities and b) back off a little.
  • A marriage in South America is held over the volcano. The participants make vows and pray for their love to never be torn apart by the fiery lava. They marry, although it is just for a taste of the ceremony. They never come close to the volcano. Though this is difficult to understand in modern days, the bride and groom celebrate their “wedding day” for them and not for anyone else. They may not have made friends in the volcano, or made a congregation of others that stood around them at the time they said, “I do.”
  • What if your ability to sing didn’t matter. Everyone could see you but no one could hear you.  What would happen?
  • You’re one of those guys at the reunion who still talks about your Dad’s truck. What if he never owned a truck? What if he drove a bus, like me? Or a train, like Harry.
  • What might you find in a place you would never normally look? Or would you pick a place you’d never look?
  • Story By Degrees- Write a story in three episodes beginning at the stage of your life where you left off with the last episode and working forward towards the present.
  • Don Quixote wandered the roads searching for adventure… refusing to accept that the world had changed.
  • You arrive in a village in a distant place. Prince Charming is gone. No one will tell you why or where to start looking.  They will only tell you it will not be easy to find what you’re looking for.
  • A fleeing circus elephant knocks down your door. It takes ten minutes to convince them it’s not a Cirque De Mimes.
  • For the bonus points, write from the point of view of someone else, choosing something that didn’t happen, providing it doesn’t hurt anyone.
  • Good storytelling is distinct from merely good writers. There are numerous good writers who do not have the storytelling skill. As such, there is no universal method of writing a good story. Reader’s digest suggests that there are some feel-good principles that are helpful in the grand scheme of narration. Keep in mind, these tips are best for non-flash fiction.
  • All my characters are named after colors. My best character’s name is red! Everyone fears him, especially the yellow guy, cause he’s got short-term memory loss.
  • There was a shadow falling across her, too dark to be any earthly thing, and far too big to be anything of this world.
  • You go to knock for “7” and notice that the doorknob is missing. Put the story together from there. Whenever a character is introduced, perhaps they can disappear right before your eyes.
  • You met your one true love in the most unlikely of places. Even stranger is the fact that they didn’t mean a thing to you.
  • Your mouth was stuffed with cotton candy and you just couldn’t stop eating it until your stomach was stretched to capacity.
  • What is that song that gets stuck in your head because you’ve heard it so many times? What did you do to try to get it out?
  • Everyone needed a unique talent to display before the king. When it was your turn to perform, you called forth your goat. Everyone gasped in awe as you unleash your goat to roll a most magnificent hoop.
  • Your friend in the Humvee deserts your unit for another overnight mission saving his own life leaving you to die. You do.
  • She reasoned that if 0.999… is the same as 1, then anytime she said she loved me one-hundred percent, she was leaving me empty.
  • Start out with “Once upon a time” and close with “happily ever after”. Change only one word in the story, but you don’t know which one.
  • The story until that day hadn’t been unusual in any way. The cat sat on the mat, the sun came up, James arrived at work. But the fact of the matter is… what came after proved to be anything but ordinary.
  • Think about an event in your past, or possibly your current life, from a different perspective. The night of the prom, but your prom date was dead and your car was possessed. Therefore, you have become a successful horror writer, still stuck with your prom date who is now a twisted, ghastly ghost that hates your guts. You also just moved in with someone you used to babysit. He’s a nice guy. Get along with your friends. Same name as your prom date.
  • Woman about to receive the highest honors awarded by the U.S. president is turned away from the White House.
  • What is the deal with people spelling words differently? They’ll write “you” when they mean “u.” It’s enough to make you cry. Write about someone who cries when people spell words wrong.
  • You get noticed when you’re happy and your energy radiates goodwill and cheer. You are so amazing when you’re happy- wave the sleep thing off the table right now and get that spirit full on!
  • There’s a man who can help you. He can fix anything, make anything better, and won’t charge you more than a fair price. He supports himself by selling fake ‘holy water’, but it works just as well as normal holy water.
  • There used to be blood and now there is none. There used to be screams and now there are almost none. There used to be couples getting lucky and now there are no clues.
  • Observe your surroundings and then write about them. Maybe what you have to say comes in the way you say it.
  • It was a gift. That’s not what name five on the list was. Your little sister’s. Flowers. Better. But… wh-wh-where did you tell you wanted them to go?
  • 100 words. A prompt can be a person, an inanimate object, a situation, a dialogue–just present it to your audience.
  • And the boss says, “there’s no such thing as authorized overtime. You wanna finish the project? Then you’ll need to steal hours.”
  • Write your own story about the world according to snow, either adding onto the story below, or making your own.
  • And you wake up in the morning and you look at your arm and it’s- it’s covered in another arm. Oh no.
  • One Monday morning, all of them were to run a time trial and then they discovered that their shoes were gone. No one owned up.
  • Others can’t read your minds… But you can still communicate with them, even if they normally don’t.
  • You are the Queen of Sheba. You’ve sent word to the King of Israel asking him for an honor. What is the honor you’re seeking?
  • Someone out there on the highway, a hitcher or a hitchhiker, was in dire need of a lift and a trusty Samaritan gave them one.
  • The characters lose their voice. How do they communicate? What do they do? Are they unable to live without voice? Who do they turn to?
  • Write something normal, then write something absurd that would happen before or after your normal story.
  • Tell the story of a failed attempt at writing an essay, playing a piano concerto or saving the world.
  • Be sure to check out the next article in this ongoing writing series where I’ll show you how to outline your short story!
  • When you were four, you loved princesses. You loved princesses. When you have a daughter, you will love princesses. When you have a son, you will love princesses.
  • Well, Janet got turned to stone, Dorothy got to go home, and Carrie puked up her pig’s blood everywhere.
  • What if someone told you to always be honest and you had to tell the absolute truth to everyone you met for the rest of your life?
  • What’s Red and White and Blue and Green? A baby that’s been covered in blueberries from head to foot!
  • There once was a wise man who said the tree that falls highest in the forest makes the most noise when it hits the ground. He forgot to say anything about the thorny trees. They tend to really hurt when they come crashing down with a fierce velocity.
  • When you made the window into the bathroom extraordinarily large. Extraordinarily large. Your window was the biggest of the bunch. That’s why they climbed out the window, right?
  • A rich banker lives in a tall apartment building. He hears a gunshot in the adjoining unit and opens the door to find his neighbor slumped over dead in a pool of blood. The detective asks “Do you know anyone who would want him dead?” The banker blurts out “I do! He foreclosed on one of my factories!”
  • Write about your best friend or your worst enemy. Then, write some of the same scenes from their point of view.
  • You walk into a room and without knowing why, the audience starts clapping. What have you done and what are you wearing?
  • Come out from the shadows and shine. There’s a whole neighborhood out there waiting. Don’t be afraid.
  • Two brothers we were born, inseparable we were. We did everything together and when dad said “Go cut that wood!” we said “Yes sir! Alright!” without a second thought.
  • Maybe you will laugh at these funny statements. Or maybe they will make you think, just a little bit.
  • While at the grocery store, you purchase a small child, apples, oranges, a turkey, cigarettes and marshmallows. Why?
  • The baby was born just as your parents were buying the area’s first VCR . They named it VideoVCR John Lennon Lennon. Yes, way before iPods, there were just people walking around named John Lennon Lennon.
  • If Juan were alive today, he’d probably be running Petrolica. Leave it all behind and that sort of thing. …If Juan had been born at all.
  • You know you’ve lived in your house a long time when you look down the hallway and you see the same footprint that has been there since you moved in. And that was three pets and two kids ago!
  • Someone from history goes back in time and makes themselves appear as they are now, living the life they have always dreamed of. Who is it?
  • Write about how horrible and mundane your life is. Challenge yourself to come up with a positive spin to this.
  • When you were younger, cops would drive by and roll down their windows, walking in slow and giving it their best roaring children a Christmas.
  • A Blonde kidnapper is running down the street to get away from the police. A girl tells her to hide in her house. The blonde goes inside and the girl locks the door behind her. What happens next?
  • You belonged to a group that no one believes exists. If you told a lie, would that belief branch out and spill over onto the rest of the world?
  • The team was in the locker room. They were all insisting someone had to shoulder the blame for when they lost this evening. This team was one of the best in college history. No one could ever think that it had been a humiliating defeat that had been at hand. But, it was…
  • A vampire is walking around with a lamp looking for the evilest person in the world. They have already visited Mr. Hyde, who was definitely evil. He tried to stab you with a fork but you escaped. You have left the house looking for the next evilest person you can find in the town. It is snowing and very cold.
  • Your dog saves your bike from falling off the roof of your car. His intentions bring your family to look at you like you should move somewhere else.
  • These are funny story prompts for kids, good family fun, inspirational funny story prompts, and funny story ideas you never thought of.
  • You have to laugh, because otherwise you’ll cry. But you’re already crying because of that gorilla pounding your head against the wall through your computer monitor. You’re doing some crying, pounding, laughing, yelling, fighting…all at the same time, so…
  • Farmer Akkbar, staring at his newborn calf of rare aqua in color on this day, May 21st, always grew sad each year at the thought of the day ending. Farmer Akkbar, an old man who had farmed long, lonely days himself, took each day personally and developed relationships with each of the days that he grew up with. As a matter of fact, his first memory began by being laid into the arms of his mother by his father as she yawned and gently sung a lullaby.
  • Folded paper can only end up a peculiar shape, The shape you were when you first noticed a peculiar feeling.
  • You have met all the people who will come to be the most important figures of your lifetime. You haven’t met the last two.
  • The most fascinating/weird character in the park is thinking about/preparing for/having/coming back from?
  • Write about a random song running through your head. Ensure it is as far from your subject as possible.
  • In a Magic Kingdom in America there was a big blue house, the house was so big that it needed the efforts of hundreds of people just to maintain the paint job. Looking back now, it is not as big as it used to be.
  • You discover that you have to go randomly murdering someone each day. You can’t stop killing, nor can you tell anyone.
  • Receive a letter from someone you don’t know. Try to figure out why they sent it to you. Maybe it’s just to show off how pretty their handwriting is… or maybe there’s a deeper meaning…..
  • Tell the story of the first car you ever learned to drive. Tell why it was your favorite car to drive.
  • A lesson dealing with uprooting the heartache of physical or emotional death, or relating to death of a person or metaphorically in some way in the story.
  • Everyone in public office should be replaced with an emoji. We would see less corruption and more emoticon appeasement.
  • If the narrator knew about the mythology of Orpheus and Eurydice, they probably wouldn’t mention them.
  • A New York City that never sleeps? A farming village where you dance all day? A knocking shop where prostitutes have active libidos! A battlefield where you’ll face a friend who’s an enemy? A business trip you wished will become a leisure trip. A religious team that does not follow the word of God? A relationship that’s mutually exclusive for partner’s sake. A toast that wanders around…
  • After rejecting allTM, your parents become cross because you lied for nothing but a weak lasting punishment.
  • The day before yesterday was a holiday. Canceling France’s victory over Russians on the common holiday occasions during French Middle Ages ///OR/// the day after tomorrow
  • Standup comedy often requires a jockey premise, with the premise illustrated by some amusing situations. The punchline usually comes at the end, and is often an abrupt realization by the protagonist.
  • A chimney sweep had fallen asleep on your fire escape when you woke that evening. It was New Year’s Day, the year was 1953. It was a cold winter night he had spent there…
  • Be a good old-fashioned customer service representative and fix your problem by billing it to another department.
  • Introduce a random trio of characters and end it with something that sounds like the answer to the question “what did you do while you were there?”
  • Talk about very ravenous creatures in a nearby pond. They punch sharks every day. Very powerful ravenous creatures.
  • Example A would lead one to hypothesize that B might be horrible. Example B would lead one to hypothesize that C might be horrible.
  • A living doll, a “baby” with its arm ripped off, someone’s head in a refrigerator, an overgrown Dachshund, with dreadlocks, spitting into his own mouth, all play pivotal roles in this story of romance and suspense under the bright blue hot Florida skies at a rest stop along I-95, halfway between my hometown and Jacksonville, where lovers go for their final rendezvous before heading, full of hope and promise, into the light of their respective futures and perhaps, oblivion.
  • The old lady wanted the house to cost only five dollars, and the realtor wanted to make lots of money, so an agreement was reached…
  • When Joseph woke up, he found the necklace gone. “Your brother took it!” said Mary. “That jerk!” said Joseph. “But he’s family…”
  • These examples are simple but can be used for creating more complicated and funny stories. Remember to keep it simple because it’s easy to make your story excessively complicated. Yet, try not to bend the truth. We know you could spin a yarn if you wanted to, so keep it real.
  • What are some of your favourite topics to get people’s funny bones tickled? Signs, Metaphors, Visuals…
  • You’re alone in a bar, with a complete stranger, who strikes up a conversation about your lack of company. What’s the first thing to come out of your mouth?
  • Due to the amount of structure involved in this creative writing idea , not everyone will feel comfortable with the prompt.
  • The demons on the wall seemed to multiply. Last night you prayed to God they’d leave you alone. Today you told Satan to take care of them for a moment while you finished the yard work.
  • Get someone’s name wrong. Accidentally quote someone famous. After telling the story two times, you get to make up your own details.
  • The family of four, mother, father, and two children were ideal, eating chocolate together in their kitchen, before the mother of the family screamed “Where did all the chocolate go!?”
  • Make one small change that is so absurd and strange that it changes the course of the character’s life.
  • Every time they opened drawers they found a pig. As a matter of fact there were meaty clumps of pig bursting into the drawers and everywhere there was snow. It was very cold.
  • Robin Hood steals from the rich to give to the poor. Why didn’t he do it my way? Give it back to the rich?
  • Tell me. If your hair is pure hemp, and you don’t hurt anyone, would a lawyer really call you a criminal?
  • When Aragorn finally grew a beard on his expedition to Mordor, it was a sign that evil was doomed. It was a beard of justice and of revenge. There was much of mankind to free, and many of that man were clean-shaven.
  • Begin, or lead-in with the bizarre fact that when you become a man/woman, you don’t get a grown woman/man as your reward, but an immature teenager.
  • No matter how many times you ask how to get started with your science fiction work out, your creator insists that you take a swim instead. He also tells you that trees and other plants love moving around and that you should run as fast as possible and plant your feet wherever they’re touching.
  • Imagine how weird or strange a setting can be just because of the patrons, employees, or decor of a restaurant.
  • There once was a girl called Maya who ate nothing but onions because she wanted to know what chicken tasted like.
  • Stephanie wasn’t sure what to do or where to turn. All the answers she always seemed to know were only blurry refractions playing tricks on her in the mirror along with some sort of mistake.
  • This comic could be used when a woman is beside someone telling a story in an animated or excited manner. Click on the preview to enlarge.
  • When life gives you step-mothers, shuck them and make delicious spicy friendship bracelets or necklaces instead.
  • There is always the guy who swam a lot, then ate the oyster. Problem was, it was followed around by the griefer. That guy did everything he could to swim and he could not shake Griefer ..
  • Crickets chirped and the fireflies shined. For miles, around the hills, and all up and down the valley, the crickets chirped and the fireflies shined. It was a perfect July night, birds chirping, crickets chirping, and fireflies shining. This was the night Bob set out to kill his wife with a firefly. During the walk to his house he thought, “I can’t bring myself to do this” and he quickly turned around. The following day, Bob caught a firefly. That night, he said to his wife, “This is for you. Happy anniversary.” and released it into the air. This went on for years. Each year Bob caught a firefly and tried to hoist, strangle, poison, electrocute, or drown his wife. He even at times prayed to a god he would not believe in for help and often felt that there was no way he could go through with it again.
  • Woke up one morning and picked up the newspaper and the television was obsessed with your funeral. Try to find out which one it was.
  • She was tall. Taller than the tallest giraffe. Taller than the tallest tree. Taller than the tallest something.
  • I’ve never seen a purple elephant. I’ve never seen a purple elephant. I’ve never. I’ve never. I’ve never seen a purple elephant!
  • It’s been days since she completely took control of my thoughts. How can this be? They say the heart was the most important muscle in the body, for some reason mine is in a condition of extreme hunger and fatigue.
  • The secret to remembering these stories is how they wrap up. Make sure you make the payoff a solid punchline. It makes the audience feel rewarded for listening.  Just remember this is a storytelling game.  Funny story still counts as a comic book. Allowing the storyteller to improve the ending gives you a bit of a wildcard factor.  Use that to your gamemastering advantage.   What funny story is more outrageous than a time traveling cat? improvise that ending.
  • It was just them and they were never sure who did it. Every year they would ask What was that Crusaid we bought last year?, That was good, who would like another one?
  • That last question could be anything. Maybe about your pet. Maybe a question about how you felt yesterday, or a memory you have of something that happened to you. Play with it. Have fun. Make up the most absurd thing you can imagine and answer in complete 100% seriousness. Try to answer any and all questions in detail – remember, your grade on the essay is based on both the quality of your grammar/language and your ability to follow the prompt given.
  • Haven’t you ever wanted to write a story that threatened people with unpleasant disciplinary action? Here are fifty ways to threaten someone with spanking.
  • You stumble upon a druid ceremony while camping and get trapped under a paralyzing spell, then get attacked by a flock of bats.
  • Superheroes must adhere to a strict Code. Here is your chance to experiment and write a story using actual coding.
  • Papers should be free . Taxes should be illegal . . .crime should be legal because crime doesn’t exist.
  • Try using the work of others to write your own. Many books choose your own adventure or comedy like scenarios which can be a fun way to… well… write the proceeding comic.
  • Plot a course. Set a goal that seems attainable or achievable. Now go for it! It’s only time, you only live once. So plunge the depths! What would it hurt if you could go through it once? Did you try? Yes? Then, you’re probably more prepared for it than you realize. Besides, the fear and jubilation are on the other side of the wall, waiting for you. Risk anything for the sake of brevity. And get it done.  Write about it.
  • Coffee doesn’t break the laws of physics, especially if you decide to do it in reverse. And if that’s a problem for you then we don’t have to be friends.
  • The garbage collectors called one night. They insisted you have too much garbage. They wanted it the next day!
  • Now known as the “Pear of Anguish,” the Captain’s Harpoon was seen hanging next to the Granite Annihilator, above the Pirates Den at The Burrow on Friday, March 4th, 1865, the day he vanished without a trace.
  • She talks with a southern accent even though she’s from the north. Someone’s been putting microchips in her diet coke!
  • You start using a word, then suddenly realise it won’t fit into the sentence and just stand there staring – dopey.
  • Remember that old computer game? Harvest Moon?  Yeah. You have that. You will always have it. Make it work for you. Till it hurts.
  • The story of a tiny character in a big world. Who could be more opposite to someone than a micro-size specimen?
  • Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, and experiencing the coolest of all cool reveries? Now, it is satire.
  • You approach a bar with the most delicious-looking men…and they greet you dressed in the riot gear and armor of the Societas Quarta Flavium. You cough politely, but nothing happens. So, you roll up your sleeves and prepare to make someone’s day . . .
  • this  cheerleader jumped over the school and ended up in Africa… the moral of this story is don’t do drugs kids…
  • He spoke, but his words didn’t match the movement of his mouth, making it impossible to determine what language he was speaking.
  • On dogs’ backside are a series of nodes in insurgents to make your dog like some people, your dog might have inadvertently contributed to the act of terrorism.
  • What comic superheroes do you know of? All of them? Give me/us the origin story of more unknown/lesser known comic superheroes.
  • What is normal to you might not be to someone else. What do you “see” white as? What did you do that no one saw?
  • Wendell E Carson, also known as “Close-Up Magic” resides in and hails from Cincinnati, Ohio. A man of many talents, he has many stories for us to read. His story ‘The Tortoise‘ was nominated for the Drabbles4Review prize, and will appear in an upcoming issue of On Spec magazine in Canada. He reminds himself every day not to cut his hair short.
  • God was going on vacation, and instead of taking one of His decoys He decided to let you run the universe.
  • As a child, your father convinces you to always lie. He knows you can’t always be responsible, or keep up with the truths, and he needs you to always be honest with him. Sometimes, at night, when kids your age are playing or hanging out around you, their parents ask if you’re staying over for the night.
  • Twins! Aren’t they great?! At least they are when they don’t share the same name and the name shows up in each story.
  • Say someone is doing a very mundane task that they hate, and introduce a monarchy. Make this kingdom be a parody of how alive most modern monarchic dynasties are.
  • Open with an apocalyptic scenario. What’s happening when you kick off the story? If you begin just after the problem, it’s not exciting enough. Make it seem like the end of the world.
  • The descriptions of your friends’ eyes were very interesting and specific. And important, which is why you’re now in your third story about this.
  • A steamroller, musical, cannibal family who all happen to speak with an English accent and still live in an attic together. And they invite a lonely, depressed, depressed God. Who continues to repeat his story titles over and over again.
  • Somewhere in a desolate place an old man and old woman bury a black box in a shallow grave in the sand.
  • God was telling a story. He told you to do something really important. He forgot to give you the punchline.
  • Write with a sleight of word or an easily skimmed over detail that may have a whole other deeper layer of meaning underneath.
  • Introduce a story as if it happened to your roommate’s best friend last week  –  with a lot of detail.
  • There was a point in history where everything made perfect sense. Somehow, for some inexplicable reason, it’s all become totally insignificant.
  • A family of monks have lived inside a sequoia for generations. When they were discovered by loggers, the monks, with no other option, moved to their spacious concrete bunker in an undisclosed location under Northern California.
  • To begin, compose humorous poems, form words into sudden verses and lines. Inspired writing catches the reader by surprise! Read examples of funny poems.
  • The best lie is not the one that hurts another person. The best lie is one that helps another person.
  • The mouse took the mocha and scurried out of the cafe as quickly as his little feet would take him… stolen.
  • There was a board game. Takes place in a hospital. You had internal injuries. Everything about you was in authentic order. Life was merely a mimicry of reality.
  • A story that starts off normally enough but quickly changes into something strange because the reader was not paying close enough attention to what was going on around them.
  • So to use this list of funny story ideas, you can either use them as starting points for your own stories or you can copy out the story starters below and then map out your own stories. Young people should definitely incorporate these writing exercises into their writing schedules. Folks who have never written before will find that these funny story ideas will fire their imagination. Warning. Writing is addictive. Instead of looking at these story starters an hour later, you will have written your own funny stories and found out why they are so much fun to discover.
  • There was this kid during elementary school who tried to trade the life of another student for an ice-cream…
  • Your town resides in the shadow of the next town over. Is there exposition? Is there conflict? Either would make a nice short story.
  • If you happen to walk into your house and your mother is wearing your underwear, don’t panic. If this happens approximately every day, consider yourself adopted.
  • Your favorite vampire. Why is he or she your favorite? How will you make your vampire a character to adore?
  • A lost and found ticket somehow made it into the umbrella you are taking home from the airport. What is on it?
  • Find the comic in your everyday life, it doesn’t matter if it doesn’t look funny to others. Focus on it to ring the comic’s innermost bell.
  • A long time ago, when on vacation and staying with his grandparents, a young boy sees something that no child should see.
  • A bunch of flowers grow around the wall of a castle. The flowers are beautiful and smell great. Sensing a growing threat, the flowers burst through the wall.
  • Bob Rader never liked school. He always got sick a day or two before exams.  It happened so many times his mom got a letter from the principal saying that Bob didn’t do his homework because he was superb at coughing up a lung.
  • Bring a character from another media to your story and do your best to fit him or her into the story.
  • Love is wanting what’s best for the other person. Love is wanting the other person to live a life without regret. Love is wanting to give… not just take. Love is like Michael Jackson’s music. Love is when you apologise and the person you’re apologising to tells you it’s OK – because they know you’re really sorry. Love is…
  • It was midnight in Allentown and all the creatures were stirring from their slumber and Frankie Gorshin cackled, “The clown you hate is heeeeeeeee!”
  • Introducing a new flavor of potato chips forces everyone to reexamine the relationship between your brand audience and your primary offering.
  • This two-sided coin of consciousness – an absurdity reflected in a mirror – forms itself into fractured magnificence.
  • A sentient corporate entity who is unhappy with some policy or other attempts to negotiate a favorable change, only to gain more than he expected.
  • If you wanted something you waited until Christmas. If you wanted money to buy something you saved until you could pay for it.
  • Personality tests? Of course you took them. What? What did you think? That everybody ‘just knew’ who you were?
  • There once was a man who lived downstream from a bar. Every night, as he slept peacefully in his bed, he kept dreaming about the things that other people had left behind.
  • Two shopkeepers, identical. They’ve been doing business together for a long time, but now they hate each other.
  • Two old ladies, one old man and a group of rebellious penguins decide to take a flight to the Arctic.
  • A man and a woman were getting married and the man asked his wife to pick a color for the leaves to be at the wedding that was to be in May. And the wife said, “I don’t care, you pick.” And the new groom said, “Then they’ll be green.”
  • Go back to about three years ago. Talk about a few painful events that have hurt your life. Then, set up the time machine. Go back and have a messy breakup before the relationship begins.
  • Amelie didn’t eat raw worms and she wasn’t a libertine but she had a pretty big world, especially for one so very tiny.
  • You’re in a race against three others. They bother you for answers as you frantically solve math problems and the littlest she asks “why does Dad let you play video games all summer?” How do you respond to her?
  • The additional dialog and explanations for the oddly out of place duck in this short story are surely what make it so absurd. The irony, humor and unexpected events or plot twists in stories are what leave you laughing. Take a look at how many funny speech topics you can think of by delving into the worlds of fiction. The first world of funny writing is the story , another is the article , and third is the joke .
  • All cops are penguins. Take a short file of dialogue or a monologue and change it just enough so that the reader never “skims” it.
  • You’re running from the mob… time is short. You enter the bank, shake the terrified teller and shout, “Fill the bag, FAST!” but the teller looks at you with a blank stare. “Tell me that you believe in the 50 cent pizza slice!” you implore him. “I do?” he responds quizzically. The barrel of a gun touches your temple. You start to lose faith in God. Zen masters may say that faith in God is illogical and blind. Has this monk transcended politics and realized war must be won on Capitol Hill? Does this mean that the sacral koan will be mathematically solved? Wait! You step past the threshold of normal execution and realize the somewhat warm red velour interior. Promising lad!
  • Prince Charming crashed your party. In a bad way. He got punched in the face by your Fairy Godmother for being a leecher and a retard, and because your Fairy Godmother hates him.
  • Part of the refrigerator door wouldn’t shut all the way, and so, when it opened and closed one day it briskly slapped a chipmunk….. right on the back of it’s head… Check this out for some other story writing prompts
  • You wake up in the morning and open your curtains, and see a volcano in your front yard. Just sitting there, calm as day.
  • Don’t be afraid if the first draft makes no sense whatsoever. If it makes sense, great! If it doesn’t, you know that you’re on the right track.
  • When God separated East from West, allowing humanity access to distant lands, the exploration that took place at the end of the fourteenth century was a once in a lifetime chance to find the “Lost Continent.”
  • It becomes a one-way ticket back to Africa. For whatever reason, your character feels compelled to return to their birthplace. What stopped them? How?
  • The Bastille Day parade starts. You are surprised because you are only expecting the stroke of midnight.
  • Write the instructions, dialogue, and stage direction in the form of a monologue or interior monologue.
  • Now that you’re married you’re like his wife. You love him despite his character flaws. Until he has a lesbian affair with the neighbor you geht along well. It’s fun. Oh, isn’t she so nice…Wait, she looks familiar…
  • An author writes a steamy novel and makes it into the present-day New York Best Sellers list. While reading this novel, readers become overly aroused and, Pollyanna like, go around kissing complete strangers.
  • You’ve got to really love the person you’re taking to. After all, it’s going to be the best time she’s ever had.
  • When the author was a child he lost his first tooth, and when no one came to pick it up he grew a new one.
  • Blow your mind, let your imagination run free, fill your mind with silly thoughts. Your fantasy might just be a silly one, but at least it’s creative.
  • You’re reading and while you are reading hot steam rises from a tall cup of coffee. You look down and notice that you’ve also read a page with a giant coffee stain. You turn back to the page you were reading, drink some coffee from that cup and return to your book.
  • Your story is not a happy story. You’re writing the story of your life – it’s happy until now. It’s time to go deeper.
  • Tell about discovering an ancient farm in your living room that is inhabited by tiny octopi. Look, one just scurried across the back of my neck. Tsk. And it just left a spot of octopus slime.
  • And so, you ended up walking through the woods until you became lost for 12 years, but it doesn’t matter, you survive. Is it possible that this is the happiest story of all time?
  • Think of the most popular global retail corporation and then write a story about them without using the company’s name.
  • What’s in my hand? Could you guess? Let me show you that…ok, ok…I’ll hand it over. It’s in fact, a purple snake.
  • You’re stuck in a building with three other strangers, and there’s no  way out. Give us a play by   play and a thrilling bit of dialogue!
  • Unfortunately, such easy steps will leave you with four unfinished, unappreciated stories, and maybe you’ll still have the “writer’s block.” What do you do, then?
  • I had a dog named Toothpaste and it was my best friend. When Toothpaste died my parents got me a new dog… it was orange.
  • Pretend you are a magician along the lines of Harry Potter or Aladdin . Designing magic will work to solve your problem.
  • To get over a hurdle, you had to devise an elaborate and complicated system of pulleys, ropes, insulators, and a pony.
  • Tell a story in the second person, meaning, you write as though you are not present, using both “you” and “I.”
  • 1.  Your first memory is of walking out of your house from behind as a child looking over your shoulder at…
  • As you are walking up to a house knocks on the door and realizes they are not at their own home and guess what? They don’t have a home anymore. Where did they go? Who are they? WHY?
  • There once was a man from Racine. Who invented a bacon tree. Made of acacia and hazelwood. Then you were encouraged to eat nuts from it.
  • In this land of orcs, hobbits, and ogres, one accomplished warrior must stand alone. What happens next?
  • A man who decided to make a bath as hot as the steamy clouds of a close gives the crops a good soaking right before harvest time. As he wanders aimlessly, he comes across men on horseback who tell of a perception he has. His teeth are dripping with saliva. He’s so angry.
  • You write a story about one of the teachers or faculty members and make them seem like the sanest person on earth, or you show them all going crazy.
  • But my kind of green. Not that money green. The kind that popped out of nowhere no matter what season you consider it green in. You know. The color of sponges…
  • Write from the detached perspective of an observer who is simply relating a bizarre story without judgment.
  • After landing on a particular Farmville building, the Indian man gets trapped in the attic and jumps out to eat Reese’s Pieces.
  • This story does not have a protagonist, which is absolutely necessary. Most stories have several, if not many.
  • A sentient video game character receives a copy of your manuscript and wants to know if he or she made the right buy.
  • There are so many different and unique causes the school board needed a new word to describe all these everyday miracles. They decided on – Every Occurrence.
  • Your teeth were perfect, white, straight, even, and very white. Your dentist even said so himself. But when you laughed, the whiteness of your teeth made the people laugh. Not with you, but at you, which lead to their teeth not being as white as yours.
  • My boss told me that my son can never let it lie. Then he added that if he doesn’t he should never work for me.
  • You had been waiting for the bus for twenty minutes. That’s no small task when there’s wheezing and coughing from a bus exhaust.
  • Your sister was stolen by a stranger when she was two. You were babysitting at the time and got a brief glimpse of his face. You’ve grown up with his face in your head and he looks like… Not someone you should confront.
  • Don’t just write your Silly Story. Give it some character. Anything along the lines of gifs, memes, dance moves, objects. Draw, sketch, or paint your Silly Story.
  • In a world where no one believes in absolutes, what can absolute fanatics shine as bright beacons? White on a white background?
  • No matter how much he tried, the door would not budge. It was stuck. Stuck like glue. Even more stuck than that.
  • The trees sighed in the morning. Life lived amongst a busy, urban street could make anyone sleepy. Today was no different.
  • You don’t need to know how and when and why things happened and who was involved. Don’t fill in the blanks. Just tell it like it happened, starting with this sentence.
  • You left for vacation with a paper due. Before you set out on your trip, your brother told you  that he had an extra copy of your paper. You don’t remember whose paper it was exactly, but you’re certain it’s a good one. It’s full of academic jargon and footnotes and looks like your professor’s thrown up everywhere. You are determined to distract him with words and numbers so that he goes away. Why don’t you call your paper “You are the Fanciest of Fruit,” He deserves this.
  • As two people watched she blew three wishes into the sky.  He wished for more wishes. The stranger coveted the first man.
  • “The shoes were shiny black pump heels. It took him four tries to get dressed. Shoes first, then socks. He tried entirely too hard in simple activities.
  • I would think it would be lonely at the top, to which the reply was, “well look who’s not worried if you liked it!”
  • A sheep, a goat and a cow had a party. They invited some other animals. One chick, a dog, and a bird. They ate ice cream, shared cake and played games until their stomachs were full. They felt like their lives were complete. They were happy. They loved to just smile and laugh and have fun. They felt like everything was lovely. They all slept like they were on a big pillow with full bellies for the rest of the night. And in the morning they talked about what a happy night they all had.
  • I know that this event isn’t actually going to occur, but it’s a fun idea. Be completely serious in telling the story, no matter how ridiculous it appears.
  • One day, out for a picnic lunch, a father notices his son standing next to a small stream, throwing stones into the water.
  • If one attempts to discuss a paradox or act in dissent, the word one is always, definitely going to be used. The stronger one makes his point, the less effective his dissent is going to be. If one kicks the proverbial hornets nest, one shall become endlessly debating with genuinely authoritative individuals.
  • This has a tongue-in-cheek-ness that runs through the entirety of the book. The narrator’s mood changes frequently, often without warning.
  • This is not a collection of horror, though my heart flinches to call it funny. It’s more a place in which you might laugh yourself sick, or even, perhaps, a little, too horrified, too afraid to ever shower the experience off or leave what you have read behind. It’s a sick world, but you know that already, don’t you?
  • We are audiences for each other. It is a mystery…There is still so much to know about ourselves and each other.
  • You have to make a photocopy of them, but you forgot your photocopier code. What are you going to do?
  • A woman hires someone to punch her in the face until she falls in love with him. Are the punches worth it?
  • Talk about someone who is completely everyday. No one would know he or she was special.– Submitted by Diana Wentworth
  • A lightning strike killed him. Well, no, it was actually the whole “thunder” part. He fell on his coffee table trying to run away from the room.
  • The want just sat down for a moment, and oh, yes, it stood up again. It moved much slower now, but it did stand up again.
  • There’s always trouble at the tippy top. It seems the higher you climb, the more treacherous it gets. This is especially true when a queen has taken over a white cottage.
  • Your incurable disease is morphing into something you actually sort of look forward to, but won’t admit it to your sister.
  • You are wearing the nicest shirt in the world. Everyone notices it. Who cares, right? No one? Sigh…
  • They buried me in a cheap pine box. face up, so my friends and family wouldn’t miss my resting face.
  • With your gaze, pretend to have deep connections to people and things around you. To forget to blink and suddenly appear severe. Then fake-blink and break from your seriousness.
  • Rolling on the floor laughing in the bathtub is the best feeling I’ve ever had scores of times and thousands of times.
  • Give two lines. The audience reads them. Then you give one line. The audience reads them. How does it make a difference?
  • Write about two survivors waiting to be rescued by a spaceship on a distant planet and all the legal battles they have to go through.
  • If you told a secret four times it no longer belonged to you. By the same token, no one had better tell your secret.
  • A man on a fire escape is funny the first time you see it, every time you see it after that is less and less funny.
  • The bus comes just after the Police Station. And just as it should it is yellow. It is full of prisoners.
  • Two guys walk into a bar, one orders a beer and the other orders a drink – neither tell the bartender what they want.
  • Tell a story in first person plural. You and Gillian the Rodeo dancer, the Devil and Charles Manson at a well blow in a bar.
  • The coldest eyes can be disguised in friendly faces, but when you know that tongue, you know the true feelings they hold.
  • Got any ideas for funny story prompts you and your friends can work on? Post your ideas in the comments below!
  • You leave the grocery store and step into your office. No, you didn’t fall asleep. You’re everybody’s boss and in the grocery store, everyone wants you to be their boss.
  • Your last diary entry might have been a bit too horrifying. How can you explain that to your readers?
  • You initiate your foible and employ your folly against him in tandem with your underhanded tactics to develop a trend as a result of the near relationship.
  • He was short, with sharp aggressive features. His hair was grey with purple highlights that reminded him of his mom’s panties.  He wore greasy mechanic’s clothes. They had tape on the elbows and a hole on the knees. His smile was sharp and he wore faded blue jeans.
  • The mother was worried the bunny was cold because when she went out this morning his fur was wet so she dried it with a hairdryer. Now the bunny has pneumonia and that is why he is ill.
  • Write about what you know. Write about your life. Write about your imaginary world. Write about your friends. Write about advice to your younger self. Write about your life as a feral child. Write about the future. Write about your past. Write about what you ate for breakfast. Write about writing.
  • You get the idea. Have fun creating your own short story writing prompts! Writing short stories is a fun and exciting way to stretch your writing skills and get into doing something other than writing long, lengthy fiction that goes on and on and on. In addition to enjoying the process of writing an entirely short story, you will also get a nice little epiphany and new ways of looking at things when you are finished with one of these short writing pieces. An entire short story that doesn’t go on forever sequence happens to be a wonderful writer’s confidence booster! Enjoy and have fun writing short stories.
  • The Moon was in the Seventh house. Jupiter aligned with Mars. All looked good for a wonderful day. Until…
  • Years later, in high school, you went to some sort of reunion. Everyone looked the same, but you were the only one who looked different. How.
  • Tell your top 10 secrets about yourself. This is a different genre but this is where you get to really set up your protagonist or antagonist but you want us to fall in love with them so you tell us secrets.
  • Make New York City’s Times Square the edge of the universe, and write about life crawling towards there.
  • I have an Uncle from India, who learned to do magic and illusion from his Indian Guru uncle, only to develop his own special, original style of magic and illusion, and outdo his own teacher.  It is simpler than it sounds.
  • People expect the unexpected so be perverse and make them think you’re going to argue a point only to contradict yourself, go off at a tangent or state the opposite.
  • I would go to Las Vegas for a year’s supply of chocolate. A chocolate fountain. Chocolate cravings. Chocolate chills. Chocoholic. Chocolate heaven.
  • Upon waking up, you look over at  the man lying in the bed beside you. You scream.  Scream loudly and violently. You never noticed it before, but he has three eyes and enhanced upper lip folds that are so pronounced he could freight train an elephant.
  • Looking into a crystal ball, your future is unknown. Your glowing aura is astounding. It comes on slowly, but you can feel yourself transform.  This happens roughly 6 times a day, and lasts roughly 30 minutes.
  • An addict steals. An out of work stripper makes men fall in love with her. A wife cannot reach her husband. A man tries to find the cure to lead poisoning. A mime gets the best of a tourist on the subwoofer ferry in Dunkirk France.
  • We can program computers or how about we’re so simple to program it makes sense for us to just be the computer?
  • The boy went to the kitchen and started making hot chocolate, when suddenly… he felt the eyes of the house staring at him. He had a malignant presence of felicity.
  • Aku was born unaware of what he was…he was totally clueless to what awaited him in the near future. In fact, he was even clueless to what lurked in the present. Every day that followed brought the young man closer to his fate, his destiny. After all, the Earth Kingdom needed a king to rule over its citizens, and Aku was it.
  • There was once a wise man who laughed when he was born, sneezed when he was taken from his mother, cursed when he was given his first name, drowned when he was baptized, and awoke alive when he was buried.
  • First, save all your money for a long time and then buy a huge M&M dispenser that looks like a cash register. Put a big bowl of candy on it. Let the whole world know you have it. Every day collect a dollar in the bowl. On a day a month, you can buy your favorite candy and eat as much as you want.
  • A great way to present these techniques is to invite students to write simple, funny, perfectly normal… stories. Work with as many students as possible. Give all students a different prompt. They are to respond by writing a 200 word story on their own computer or laptop.
  • There once was a midget who dreamed of a comeback, but it never came. He ended up choking on his own stuffing.
  • Wake up flailing like an octopus, screaming  like a hyena, and roll down the stairs like a bowl of jelly.
  • You hate to see a grown person cry. This friend of mine had been upset for the longest time—not a tissue in earshot.
  • So Johnny gets himself the smallest poodle he can find. He feeds him ferociously for ten years and makes him the tiniest, yet proudest and puffed up dog anyone has ever seen. Ten years later Johnny has a hurricane in his backyard and his little poodle blows away.
  • What if you were in the mafia and no one knew about it but you. You’d tell everyone you’re a whistleblower and everyone believes you and you end up living happily ever after because the mafia takes pity on you.
  • Write a book review. From the point of view of someone who has never really read books before, but knows how to balance a checkbook. Someone who had to split a number 73.09difully into three equal coupons. Just do it.
  • Everything you’ve ever wanted, everything you’ve ever done in your entire life, is for the purpose of finding him. Her. It. The thing. You don’t know what you’re looking for. You want it very badly.
  • There was too much singing in the land. The women began to scream for the men to camp out. One man, The Little Boy the singing wouldn’t.
  • The funniest story to tell is almost always based on yourself or those we love. Based on Novelty, Surprise, and Incongruity. It means the unexpected and goes above and beyond expectation. By telling a far-fetched story, you make your listener almost believe what you’re saying is really true.
  • I have a window in my house. It’s not very big. It’s not very special. It doesn’t have a sill, but it lets the outside in. Even when it’s in the rain, it lets the outside come in.
  • If you were given no obvious books as a present, what literary and philosophical ideas would be present in your current go-to book for entertainment?
  • Go back into this moment before it happened. And stop yourself from doing whatever you should not have done, but would have done. Now do that thing you should have done and perhaps didn’t and experience how things could have been.
  • Then one person volunteers to stand behind the blindfolded person and lead them to the door, around the fireplace and down to the boot.
  • Their house, a plantation / Country house, belonged to her family for so many, many years/decades / ages.
  • Without warning, baby calves were eating fruits and vegetables out of your hand. You were high off of the fumes of baby cows inhaling all the legal highs of the western world there ever were.
  • A humorous approach on a normal everyday day needs to schedule your weekly boring task. Life, as we know it is regulated and controlled by events that are equally as mundane, but seemingly boring. As a result it is key to know how to look at the world and find something goofy in the simplest of things, in order to create either humour or comedy. Work is definitely not exempted from this. Schedule Week is here to show you an exemplary method of taking a dull and boring subject to begin with, and revamping it by exaggerating it to the point where readers start laughing uproariously. Someone at work was incompetent and got the constructive feedback they needed.
  • Imagine it’s the end of your life and reincarnation was shortly available. What would you say to God/the Devil when your case is made?
  • But you didn’t see that third pedestrian in the crosswalk. You never look. You are angry that everyone thinks you are Russian gangster, when all that you have ever been is a college graduate, and that’s not so menacing, is it?
  • There was an outrageous amount of crime happening. An exaggerated amount of crime. Non-believers doubted this. They made it fake news and covered it up as much as they could.
  • There are exactly three toilets in this household, one in the upstairs bathroom on NW corner, one in the downstairs bathroom, left of the door, and the other in the garage.
  • Next when you are in the shower, start to have this huge vision/experience. The kind that incorporates seeing, hearing, over-all body sensations all at once.
  • Direct the response to a sudden twitch in your body that you are unaware of and which seems horribly unflattering to everyone except you.
  • There’s a big difference between small town gossip and big city gossip. Big city gossip comes on softly. Small town gossip can wake you from a deep sleep.
  • The List is a very simple story building method. You have a number of objects, animals, characters…etc and you put them in no particular order.
  • It’s best to play it on the safe side when writing a humor story. Animals and children are funny. Spouses can be funny. Frustrated businessman can be funny. A kick in the pants is funny if it’s well placed. Police officers haven’t had many great roles in literature, but they could also make a great comedy.
  • Drama. Iphigenia leaves Agamemnon to marry Achilles for fear of prophecy, then her father spots her.
  • A man gets into a time machine to see his life as a toddler again, but he can’t get past the 1970s. Frustrated he jumps out of the time machine and whacks his head hard on the ground.  Now that he thinks about it, his life is pretty sad. He heads back into the time machine where he meets his toddler self.
  • My grandmother told me to stop being so lazy. She told me to get off of that couch and stop spending my 20s on the internet. She told me that you can’t find happiness behind the glow of a computer screen. What? Since when? A 65-year-old-maiden telling us young people to get their faces out of their monitors… You have to love that.
  • Four of the ten commandments will send you to heaven and four will send you down below. Aside from not murdering anyone, which ones are they?
  • Time marched forward in its relentless infinite. Everyone it touched aged, died, and became someone’s memory to be cherished or hated, feared or longed for. Some of us fell out of time. What can we do?
  • The frenemies. However close two people seem to be, one of them always secretly despises the other one.
  • “Let me show you how to make the waffles that John makes. With him you have to get everything just right or else you’re in big trouble. So…”
  • Sweet and innocent. So innocent you don’t understand that the old man is hitting on you and you are taking it.
  • Snapdragon is a flower that should be used more often in stories especially when it refers to someone who is too fat.
  • You’re walking along, casually, and you step on an electrical transformer, ending you in one lightning-explosion.
  • This would mean some of the steps in these writing processes will have to be tweaked, changed and deleted to fit this type of writing form.
  • There were two red headed boys walking in a park, and one did something that made his head turn bright red.
  • You are a significant historical figure for no other reason than living in the same time as another significant historical figure. Anyone want peanuts?
  • A secret code, a silly memory, an unexplained feeling of wanting to bolt, a suspicion is born. Claiming to be savvy, write a heartfelt account of this suspicion and all the silly little coincidences that surround it.
  • Wrong. Whatever wound up in your lawn was synthetic. It’s tough keeping up with the neighbors. Tough on your lawn. Tough on the environment. A little sanity here please…
  • A coliseum over a candy factory is converted into a cathedral over a bomb factory, forcing many humans to move while wolves eat puppies to get their greasy coliseum-candy fix.
  • Have you ever noticed how no one ever takes the time to ask the simple questions? We could all improve ourselves greatly by just taking time to ask the simple questions.
  • This is the opening sentence from one of the original Sherlock Holmes short-stories. You probably recognised it… Now, extend it.
  • 3. Consider recompense techniques. Teenagers are accustomed to getting what they want, when they want it. They want the iPod? Tell them there are two conditions, a gift for mom and a gift for the little brother. They want $4 of allowance? $4 of  laundry and $4 of help cleaning.
  • The boy kissed the frog, because she was enchanted… Because only the kisses of a prince would have been able to revive her and break the spell. What happened next was downright distasteful.
  • People. Lots and lots of people, crammed tightly together, packed into a small house, with no windows…. and then they woke up. Tell it from the point of view of someone who has no idea what they’re doing.
  • There once was a man who wanted to cross a river. The current was swift, the water deep. In a split second, he lost everything before he even had a chance to think to second what was happening.
  • Never take candy from a stranger.  Especially if it is red and white striped and has a white fluffy tip.
  • There are lights on the Christmas tree. Romantic interludes taking place. Aphrodite watched Aphrodite. The playful waves pull the hair in the wind. The stars glisten deep in the firmament. There is but one that twinkles.
  • Use explosive words. Don’t worry about being controversial, or even realistic. Follow your heart and spin a good yarn.  What would happen if?
  • It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a really huge and expensive diamond ring. The same held true for a young man in possession of five very large and very expensive rings…
  • At the stroke of midnight, all of your vending machine change became painfully  brightly colorful pieces of paper currency.

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